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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have finally cracked.

12 replies

Lottiebugz22 · 17/04/2022 11:45

My partner does nothing.
I have 2 kids who are up all night under 4. Its me that gets up with them. He works so apparently he's exempt from parenting and housework. I'm burnt out and quite frankly feel depressed. I finally cracked this morning told him to fuck off and everything that has been building up I've let out. I've spoken to him countless times over this and nothing ever changes.

OP posts:
Quincythequince · 17/04/2022 11:46

He’s a selfish, useless arsehole.
What did he say/do in response?

Chely · 17/04/2022 11:47

LTB and still do everything

Unanananana · 17/04/2022 11:48

LTB. You'll still do everything but there will be less of it and no useless great manchild lump watching you do it.

Original poster
Lottiebugz22 · 17/04/2022 11:51

He said I'm a miserable person to be around. And I shouldn't of had kids in that case? The entire reason I'm miserable is because of him not helping. His response is that he works and is tired so expects to relax when he gets home. I understand that I really do but I never get to relax. Ever. I don't do anything for myself as I am constantly with the kids which I adore but I need some time out. Even a bath on a night would be nice instead of a 5 minute rushed shower.

OP posts:
Quincythequince · 17/04/2022 11:51

Who on earth voted YABU?

Unanananana · 17/04/2022 11:55

Well, if you leave him and he has contact like a decent father should the jury will be out on that one by the sound of it you'll get some well deserved time to yourself.

If you don't want to leave him, I suggest telling him its no longer the 1950's and he needs to step up or fuck off. No longer do women worship at the altar of Men With Jobs. And don't have any more children this disgusting, sexist specimen.

Quincythequince · 17/04/2022 11:57

@Lottiebugz22

He said I'm a miserable person to be around. And I shouldn't of had kids in that case? The entire reason I'm miserable is because of him not helping. His response is that he works and is tired so expects to relax when he gets home. I understand that I really do but I never get to relax. Ever. I don't do anything for myself as I am constantly with the kids which I adore but I need some time out. Even a bath on a night would be nice instead of a 5 minute rushed shower.
Tell him to leave. Go. If you’re that miserable, tell him to go and do better. Useless man.
Laserbird16 · 17/04/2022 11:58

Fuck this for a game of soldiers. Pick up and go to your parents or a friend's. Have some sleep and then get job searching. You need an exit strategy. He's not participating in family life if he can't pitch in his 120 plus hours a week he's not working. You're worth more than just his live in servant/nanny/easy shag.

Merryoldgoat · 17/04/2022 12:11

Men like this aren’t worth the skin that holds them together.

You’ll be better alone without him making you miserable.

CurlyBurley · 17/04/2022 12:14

@Quincythequince

Who on earth voted YABU?
The men on the site I expect.
LaurieFairyCake · 17/04/2022 12:35

You need to leave

But be prepared that he may not want to see them at all

And you will still be doing everything Thanks

Luredbyapomegranate · 17/04/2022 12:43

If he really won’t change you will have to leave.

Go see a solicitor and start making plans

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