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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think people look down on care assistants

173 replies

Fjdowkrialkakvk · 16/04/2022 19:38

And many other low paid jobs in general.
I went to university but I work predominantly as a HCA. I also work one day a week in a 'professional' role related to my degree.
Fortunately I am a relatively well-paid care assistant, earning £2 an hour more than the minimum wage. Many care homes or companies pay the bare minimum wage. I also get time and a half on all bank holidays which not everyone does.

Part of my role involves community care. I've had a client's daughter tell me she was 'surprised' i was in this role as I seemed intelligent and like I had more to offer.
I just take comments like that as tone deaf. I've also had some families of clients who clearly look down at you even though you're assisting their family member to live.
Just earlier I was at a lady's home and her granddaughter was there staying for a couple of days. She asked me to go and do her Grandma's washing up.
The Granddaughter could have bloody done it herself, it's just laziness and probably thinking they're too good to do it themselves.

It's considered a low skill role, and there's a common misconception that high pay must always mean high responsibility and vice versa.

I am physically and verbally assaulted by dementia residents, deal with medication and care equipment, I believe care assistants have a lot of responsibility. Luckily we have many appreciative residents and families.

Has anybody ever felt that such work is looked down upon or considered lowly?

OP posts:
cansu · 16/04/2022 20:20

I would like to see a degree level course with courses in special needs and other health conditions, psychology. The job needs to become a profession with a progression ladder and appropriate pay.

JollyWilloughby · 16/04/2022 20:22

@Fjdowkrialkakvk

The pressure for overtime is obscene. All throughout the pandemic I was doing 15 hour shifts 7am - 10pm . Never stopped, it felt like the modern day English slave labour.

Nothing was ever enough.

I remember one hot day last summer feeling dizzy with blistered feet. I had solely changed one residents pad with him hitting me at the same time. Very dangerous practice but no staff and no instruction. He soiled again…. I changed him again…. He hit out again ….. he did this 3 times. I could feel myself getting angry. I didn’t want to be that person.

I took a deep breath, sat on the floor and cried. He looked confused.

I composed myself.

I changed him for the last time. He smiled.

Honestly …. I had to leave. I couldn’t carry on.

overitall1 · 16/04/2022 20:26

The carers we had for my DM in the 4 years before she died were absolutely incredible but we know we were very lucky. My DUncle in a different part of the country had a very different experience and he ended up covered in bedsores.

Good ones: worth their weight in gold.

traygreyplay · 16/04/2022 20:26

I'm an AHP in hospital and the HCAs are the people that know everything and are a massive help to my role. I always go to them first for the info on what's going on. I'm in awe at everything they do and know and are the backbone of the NHS. It's shameful how much you get paid and the disrespect you are given.

starlingdarling · 16/04/2022 20:27

I've never looked down on care workers. They are woefully underpaid for what is a high responsibility job. Anyone who can last in that job is a saint in my eyes.

AChocolateOrangeaday · 16/04/2022 20:32

As someone with disabled 17 yr old DS I have nothing but the utmost respect and admiration for care assistants, same as I do SEN teachers and TA's.

I am the full time career for DS and as his Mother I don't have a choice, but no amount of money could persuade me to do it otherwise.

You are actively CHOOSING to do one of the hardest jobs there are for crap money and very little reward.

Don't you dare ever think you are lesser than anyone and Thank you for doing what you do.

flowertoday · 16/04/2022 20:36

HCAs, support workers and carers are so valuable, and are absolutely the beating heart of health and social care. I started as a support worker and am now qualified to do a more important/ respected role ( well all relative - this is social care still! ). I feel that support workers and all of those workers doing the hands on care are far more important than me, or what I do.
It is a real skill to be able to care well, never mind all the extra skills and knowledge for different needs. You are amazing - thank you for all you do.

MrOllivander · 16/04/2022 20:38

Definitely. I have a business degree and people always seemed confused (like if they asked about personal stuff or we got chatting)
Honestly? I took it because I needed any job at the time. Turns out I was pretty good at it!

It's the small things like always wearing the same perfume/deo so someone with sight difficulties knows it's you coming in before they hear your voice, remembering someone likes sugar in their tea or talc or their top inside out because of the seams. And always looking calm!

Original poster
Fjdowkrialkakvk · 16/04/2022 20:38

Thanks so much everybody!

OP posts:
AliceMcK · 16/04/2022 20:46

YANBU

I have many relatives who are care assistants. I will admit to telling them they can get better jobs. This is not because I think the role is beneath them or anyone, it’s because I know how shit they get treated. Also how shit many of their clients get treated. They don’t just do these jobs because they have to, they do them because they actually care and love what they do.

During the pandemic care assistance were treated appallingly, many buying their own ppe. My DH got given 4 large bottles of hand sanitizer and gloves when he went to clear his desk to start wfh, he was one of the last in the office so the manager gave him everything that was left to take home. I gave it to one of my cousins, she almost cried. She went round her friends and colleagues filling up all their little hand sanitizer bottles so they had some.

I have the upmost respect for care assistants. Sadly though because it is a low paid job, you also get low rate people doing it which tars the rest of the people who do care and do amazing jobs.

MardyOldGoth · 16/04/2022 20:48

I was a carer in a nursing home 20 years ago and I loved it, but you are right, it is (massively) underpaid and undervalued! To be fair to the general public, I think a lot of people do have a great deal of respect for care assistants. I've been asked about it by people who were genuinely interested in what I did, received thanks and praise from clients' families, and heard the words 'gosh, you're wonderful, don't think I could do that' a good few times, but there are still people who think it's a menial job done by people who can't get a better one. And the low pay and poor working conditions of care workers does not help disabuse people of that belief.

dollydimple123 · 16/04/2022 20:50

YANBU they absolutley do look down on them. I've experienced this both as a carer and as someone working in management in care when others speak about the careers like they are beneath them. Really annoys/upsets me as a good carer is worth their weight in gold!

saveusernamee · 16/04/2022 20:53

This makes me so so so sad.
Care workers are there because the family isn’t capable or doesn’t want to care for their family member. It’s harrowing to put such a cheap price of familiar care. They/you deserve a wage that allows you a comfortable life. Like the one you’re giving to them….

LetitiaLeghorn · 16/04/2022 20:55

We employ three private carers for my mum with dementia. Of course my mum doesn't think she has any problems and although she's not outright rude, she's not welcoming. Previous to them we employed carers through an agency.
All our carers have been so lovely to my mum. I think it takes a special kind of person to be a carer that actually has nothing to do with qualifications but to do with a kindness and understanding.
Employing our carers privately means we can pay well above the minimum wage and we have just given them Easter off on full pay or they can work for time and a half. We also give them time off if we visit mum or stay over. It's really important to us to treat them well so that they want to stay.
Please know that there are ignorant people around but the vast amount of peoole who use your services are grateful and really value you.

abc123doh · 16/04/2022 20:59

I have a law degree and went into care. I was in a management role at one point but it wasn't for me and went back to being a care assistant instead. Occasionally I would tell clients and their families about my degree because of their negative attitude towards me and suddenly I'd be treated with more respect after they'd got over their disbelief. Sometimes people would find out about my degree and start being off with me because obviously having a degree means you're not able to be a carer.

Imlovinglife · 16/04/2022 21:02

I don't know if "look down" is the right word.

I will, however, admit that when I see people doing hard and low paid jobs, I quietly thank my stars I was born with a good brain and the ability and discipline to learn and study.

Obviously, I keep that to myself.

We all think that a bit sometimes. Admit it!

Countdownis35 · 16/04/2022 21:06

Look down is definitely the right word and that's putting it mildly go on admit it

MyMoneyIsAllSpent · 16/04/2022 21:08

I've been a carer off and on for over ten years. Before that I had my own successful business and previously to that I was a PA to a 'Sir' and I have to say caring is the hardest job I've done. There's no room for mistakes. It is also highly qualified. I am constantly training and retraining. I've never felt looked down on, luckily, I've always felt appreciated. Remember, as a carer, you are required to follow the care plan... it might not include doing the washing up, the washing or walking the dog. Night to all you angels out there. You are angels and I'm sure much more appreciated than you know.

JollyWilloughby · 16/04/2022 21:09

@Imlovinglife

I felt relieved to leave, knowing that it was not my future, however that's not because I think I have a great brain in comparison to carers.

Some carers, and I use the word some have had very difficult lives themselves and they can often be from disadvantaged backgrounds. In my experience having worked with them, they need more self belief in their abilities to branch out, but they often find themselves stuck in poverty traps and unable to see other career paths.

The job is hard but it is made so much harder than necessary. Working 7am-10pm which was a normal shift pattern for our (national, private social care provider) at minimum wage is bordering on abusive surely?

You cannot care for anybody doing those hours. Your reserves are far too low.

BotterMon · 16/04/2022 21:09

It really needs to be a recognised role. The number of care staff who I've heard say "I'm just a carer" drives me mad. It's an extremely highly skilled role.

I think a lot of it stems from years ago when carers were known as 'home help' where now you are doing more of a district nursing role and it needs to be recognised as such.

If Joe Public knew the amount of knowledge you have around medication, moving and handling, infection control, nutrition, fluid intake, dementia etc. etc. - the list is endless. So many carers do catheter care, stoma care, monitor insulin, use the dreaded convenes and yes, you are right - you should have told the granddaughter to do her grandmother's washing up! Yes she would have complained but would she have asked the GP do the washing up? No of course not so why on earth does she think she can ask you to do it when she's there?
You are wonderful and do stick up for yourself re the constant demand to do extra hours. Yes recruitment is the worst it's been ever but that's not your problem. You need to take care of you!
(I'll get off my soapbox now).

doggiescats · 16/04/2022 21:10

I work in a care home and have the utmost respect for each and everyone of our carers.Absolutely lovely,caring,compassionate people who deserve so much more .
They work long hours up to 48-50 a week for shitty pay and are treated so disrespectfully by the management ! Sometimes I wonder what makes people behave how they do towards the workers!!
Anyway the carers have now voted with their feet and over half the workforce have resigned!
Absolutely shocking that they have been pushed this far that they have taken this action for their own mental wellbeing.
I guess it is all down to greed…very sad for everyone concerned!

dangermouseisace · 16/04/2022 21:10

Totally agree. Caring is actually a highly skilled and difficult job, and it requires constant training! The rate of pay should be much higher to attract intelligent and skilled people into the caring profession, and to retain them.

LakieLady · 16/04/2022 21:16

My friend is a care assistant in a dementia care home. I am in awe of what she does, and I couldn't do her job in a million years.

I think they're worth several times the hourly rate they're paid, too.

Onlyforcake · 16/04/2022 21:18

Definitely. I'm a care worker now. I don't even think people are aware of the obvious contempt they demonstrate.

mrshoho · 16/04/2022 21:19

I highly value all of the hca who care for my mother and the other residents. The salary for carers should be increased to reflect the important role they play and the responsibilities they hold. With our ageing population we need to encourage more people into this sector. Some people are put off simply because the salary is not enough to live off.