Baby feeding.

[charlottecruz]

AIBU for wanting to kick off at a people who want to have a say in everything?

I'm often very calm and take everyone's advice but it has started to really grind my gears when I get unsolicited opinions regarding me feeding my child.

My 12 week old has fallen into the habit of sucking on his fingers and hands, when not hungry. Initially i thought was hunger too, but he does this even after taking a bottle. I see why people would think him pushing out his dummy from his mouth and replacing it with his fingers might seem he's hungry, but when I insist 2/3 times he's not, it's too far.

We have finally got him to feed more and less often, as he used to want less ounces more often. He's now feeding usually ever 3/4, 5-6 during the night, so when people question and insist DS is hungry and force me to give him a bottle earlier, it irritates me, especially when he doesn't finish the bottle.

Does anyone else have this issue and how do you deal with it in a nice way, because i'm really losing my calm and I don't want to cause an argument, but it's really annoying me now. AIBU?

My baby my decision- and stare them out. You are the grown up op. Tell them to stfu if necessary..

It depends on who makes the comment. If it's the older generation, I'd say something like "things have changed since you've had a baby 30 years ago". If it's someone in your generation, which I'd be surprised at, I would just tell them to fuck off depending on your relationship with them. I had so many comments and still do from my mum and family and their friends, they don't actually remember what it was like to be in the thick of it. just remind them that they are old 😂

No idea how to deal with it as I haven't been called out on it yet but I just wanted to say my DS is also 12 weeks and he is exactly the same.

Recount the time that someone made you feed early and they weren’t hungry based on this.
My in laws were awful with saying DD didn’t look tired when I’d go to put her for a nap yet she’d be asleep within 5 minutes (because I was trying to not get to the point of her being over tired) so when they’d say that I’d say lightly “oh you always say that but then she always falls asleep because she needs the nap, remember last time”

I would just tell them that I know my baby and not give into what they think I should be doing. Everyone has an opinion when it comes to babies and parenting but you are the only one that knows your baby like you do. I'm sure you're not depriving your baby of food! If that means saying something bluntly to shut them down then so be it.

thank you! it's really been aggravating me lately, because a little advice is fine, but the constant remarks or insinuating that my child isn't fed enough has really crossed a mark. i didn't want to cause a scene or be unreasonable. but i really will stand my ground and be firm, after all you're all right, he is MY son.

next time i get a remark about him being hungry i'll respond with "it's clear i deprive my child of food, that's why he gets called "michelin man" (as a joke, because of his slightly chubby little legs)

Our little man is currently 5 weeks old. Since he was born he has struggled to poo, when he does he seems in pain (pulls knees up etc) and when he does poo its very runny !! He was also bringing his milk up. He was on Cow and Gate.

we took him to our GP who prescribed sma alfamino, he has been on it for 4 days now, poo is still the same and still bri gi g up his ilk although know more watery and mucasy. Anyone else had this issue??

I remember my daughter found her fingers and sucked her thumb about this age. I had a few unwanted comments about how thumb sucking is terrible and she might be hungry? She wasn’t hungry it was how she learnt to self-sooth herself, often she would settle herself back to sleep this way. She’s 3 now, thankfully sleeps well and never sucks her thumb. These are all phases, I think hand to mouth is a normal baby development. Good luck you’re doing a great job.

We have finally got him to feed more and less often, as he used to want less ounces more often.

The reality is your baby is sucking fingers etc because they suckle not only for milk but for comfort. It's a bottle feeding drivem (and thus relatively recent, in evolutionary terms) thing to stretch the time between feeds, with breastfeeding on demand they tend to feed far more little and often because babies love to suck.

Babies suck on their fingers to meet that desire to suck and because skin feels nicer in their mouth than a plastic/latex etc dummy.

If people question you just laugh and say "oh he loves to suck. He's just had a feed, he's not hungry."

You need to be firm because this is only the start of the unsolicited advice. My fil used to do this and a few times out of respect I would give in and make my ds a bottle which he wouldn't finish because he wasn't hungry. When fil would start making comments about someone being hungry I'd respond that he wasn't, as he'd just had a feed or rhat he wasn't due yet. I would then give it to ds when he showed actual hunger cues and ds would drink all his milk. I was consistent when fil behaved this way and he backed off. It is annoying, yanbu.