Fairly short notice given (invite sent in Feb, wedding in May). In another country. Will take me around 2 hours to get to the airport and it's a 3 hour flight to get into the country in question. Then it's another 1hr flight within the country to get to the town where the wedding is with a 40 minute transfer window to get into that flight. Or alternatively a 4 hour train journey. Costs at least £300 just for the flights. On top of that I will need to add on the cost of accommodation, food, taxis etc. I would need to travel on the day of the wedding as well, as before that it's not an option for childcare reasons. I adore the friend in question, we used to be firm friends when we lived close to each other, and over the years we've kept in touch by video calling and messaging and seen each other a handful of times. Myself and husband are on a low income (I'm on maternity leave) and the cost alone is putting me off but at the same time I'd love to attend. It just seems like a lot of effort and probably getting into more debt, which I'd hate. What would you do and say to this friend?