To think she should have been aware of this ?

[PinkAndViolet]

Friend came out of a long marriage and just a few months on, got together with a woman who had lost her husband a year ago. She said it was love at first sight and that they have both never been happier.
However, despite it being several years together now, she admits she feels some jealousy when he talks about his deceased wife and today, they are having a party to celebrate what would have been her 50th birthday. Friend is not going and has not contributed to any of the social media posts about it. She keeps telling me she feels jealous and upset. Aibu to say that it takes a strong person to go into a relationship with a widow/widower especially when the previous marriage was so strong and there was so much love there?
Personally I couldn't do it but friend is even more insecure than me so I'm not sure what she was expecting? It was always going to be tough.

Just tell her what you think - that she’s a bit shit. Then she’ll know what you think of her and she’ll confide in anyone more understanding and sympathetic. You have a nerve talking about her like this, it’s really nasty.

So in a nutshell - you’re bored of your friend moaning about her husband and his dead wife, and think she should just suck it up as she knew he was a widower?

I don’t know why you think she would be helping to organise the party or posting about it on social media. It makes complete sense that she wouldn’t be involved.

OP’s friend:

m.youtube.com/watch?v=WbyoQXPXZRI

you would have thought that she would have been aware of all all beforehand.
expected that new partner would not forget a long and happy marriage with a woman he loved? absolutely
50th Birthday party for dead woman several years after her death? not so much.