Yes I am.

[choccohoopz]

Neighbour I've always judged from my perfect little glass house since moving in a few years ago isn't a drunk - she has bloody Huntington's disease.

Her older daughter lived with her and there was always drama and often had police turning up, it's been better since she moved out a year ago thank god. House is a mess, garden is chaos. But yea, she's not a drunk who staggers along walking her dog, she's actually really sick.

Dog was barking all night, I told other neighbour who had a key - they told me she'd had a fall the day before so we're worried as the dog isn't usually left at night (even then I assumed a drunken fall). I ended up looking after the dog and when she got back (hospital transport) I found out about her health. I now have her number and have offered everything but I feel awful.

There are still issues but these are all from her kids who turn up every now and then, cause drama and then bugger off.

Now I know I can see it so clearly in her. Not sure what the point of this post is. Just that I am a twat, generally nice and empathetic but not this time.

Off to buy her a plant and reinforce my offer of help in a selfish attempt to feel like less of a dick.

AIBU? Maybe not so much now, but definitely before. What an actual idiot.

All to easy to judge but everyone has done it if they're honest.
I would be neighbourly but most certainly not get involved too much otherwise could end up picking up the pieces after the 'dramas'.
Please don't beat yourself up with the guilt thing, but then you don't need to put on the horse hair shirt either.

It's an easy mistake to make. I know it's not their duty to, but they could have given you a heads-up about her condition.

Don't beat yourself up this is very common for Huntington's disease patients to be seen as a drug or alcohol missuser due to the symptoms they display. The main thing is you know now and are clearly being as supportive as you can. Sometime HD patients can present as rude or abrupt etc If this happens it is down to the changes in the brain so don't take it personally.

Please be kind to yourself. You didn’t know and as far as I’m aware you kept all your judgment in your head, no one was hurt.

My dad has MS, for many years until he started using walking sticks he used to get off the train at the end of the day and wobble and sway to the train station exit and people were incredibly rude assuming he was a commuter on his way home pissed. It happens! But you haven’t hurt anyone by judging in your head. So don’t worry too much :)

Huntingdonshire is genetic, the kids could well be suffering too. Horrid disease but some very encouraging research just recently

You couldn't have known her condition until you were told. Does she have any carers supporting her?

Each of her kids has a 50% probability of having the condition, so things are pretty bad for them, too.