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Original poster

WYYD social services

41 replies

outofmycomfortzone001 · 12/04/2022 21:39

Need some advice. Obvious name change for good reason!

I've known friend for 3 years and she's getting worse. She has 4 children and has very little interest in them. She regularly says she'd rather be at work than be around her kids, when she's home she leaves DC with her partner while she goes out as she struggles to be around them.

It's effecting the children badly. Their behaviour from lack of routine is seriously bad. Her two youngest are constantly becoming unwell as she gives them dirty bottles and has admitted to me on a few occasions she's sent them to nursery with last nights bottles of milk by mistake and only known about it when nursery complained.
She regularly complains she has no nappies, can't afford food for the children etc yet she spends all her money on cannabis (I have no problem with cannabis but make sure your children are sorted first and don't smoke it around them!)
Her partner is violent and regularly smashes up their house with the children in the home. She also leaves her children constantly with violent partner.

Would I be wrong to call social services? She's disclosed more things and it's really worrying me.

OP posts:
DaphneSprucesPippasClack · 12/04/2022 23:04

It's wrong not to report it. These are infant human beings they deserve adults in their lives to look out for them.

Original poster
outofmycomfortzone001 · 12/04/2022 23:12

Thank you all I've done the right thing. Much as it breaks my heart, it'll break even more if something was to happen to them. Hopefully they'll help her.

OP posts:
EmeraldShamrock1 · 12/04/2022 23:18

The salmonella outbreak in Kinder eggs was caused by bad milk, she could kill the DC.

EmeraldShamrock1 · 12/04/2022 23:19

Good job. 👍

Lisad1231981 · 12/04/2022 23:20

Well done, you have done right by those children. Hopefully your call will start the ball rolling. They will likely contact nursery, GP and HV all of which should have small pieces of the jigsaw. They should also do a police check on the partner who might also be known.

They are the adults, they have control over their own decisions but those poor kids are at the hands of those decisions too. You have protected them

VVKills27 · 12/04/2022 23:25

Speaking as a social worker I urge you to refer this to social services as soon as possible. This situation reads like a potential tragedy waiting to happen - violence, drugs, neglect, disinterest in children, leaving them with a violent man who is only the parent one for days on end). You really have a duty to report this.

VVKills27 · 12/04/2022 23:26

So sorry I didn’t read the last few posts before typing. Well done OP, don’t feel guilty, you have certainly done the right thing by those poor children

autienotnaughty · 13/04/2022 05:31

Ss should speak to nursery but you could also ring them (anonymously if preferred) and explain your worries. They will have to record this and it may encourage them to keep a closer eye on kids.

Philisophigal · 13/04/2022 07:04

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn at the user's request.

JusticeSystem · 13/04/2022 07:26

@Benjaminsniddlegrass

Please contact MASH in your area, you can remain anonymous but please share your name, details and connection to the family with them as this lends more weight to the referral. I used to manage a MASH team, we would speak with you and properly understand your concerns, we would speak with parents and complete checks with other agencies (nursery, police, health visitors etc) to try and understand the full picture better. There may be other bits known and this would help to explain what is happening for the children. Alongside that if you have any evidence (texts/photos etc) please share when you refer them in, they can't be used in court but they are really helpful in helping us to understand who is telling the truth. Sadly there are many malicious anon referrals so anything you can do to support your referral is great. But yes in summary you should contact SS mash, don't bother with NSPCC - they just send it on to SS.
Alongside that if you have any evidence (texts/photos etc) please share when you refer them in, they can't be used in court but they are really helpful in helping us to understand who is telling the truth.

Why can't it be used in court?

girlmom21 · 13/04/2022 07:46

You're doing the right thing OP.

GrowingUpIsATrap · 13/04/2022 07:51

Well done @outofmycomfortzone001 you've definitely done the right thing.
I was thinking about this situation, i am sure you knew what everyone would say any you just needed a little bit if reassurance that reporting was the right thing to do.
I am really, really glad you have done it.

JeffThePilot · 13/04/2022 08:07

You’ve definitely done the right thing.

User0610134049 · 13/04/2022 08:16

I would speak to social services
And I would be surprised if she isn’t already on their radar via nursery but might just add a piece of the puzzle

Yerroblemom1923 · 13/04/2022 08:29

You've done the right thing, OP. Please keep us updated on how things turn out.

Giraffesandbottoms · 13/04/2022 09:43

I would leave well alone

That is so shitty and irresponsible of you then!

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