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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder how people afford to travel the world?

126 replies

chatterbug22 · 10/04/2022 18:07

I’m 20, partner is 23. No DC yet but a consideration within the next several years, as a personal choice I would rather be done in 20s if at all possible.

We both have good jobs and our first home together, we’ve chosen to rent under one of the government schemes with the idea of buying our house at the end of a time period. We get a hefty discount to enable us to save for a deposit on the house however we won’t necessarily buy it as it’s a 2 bed and in time we’ll need more space. Redeeming quality is that it’s way cheaper than extortionate private rent, does not tie us in and enables us to save for a house deposit - whichever house that we choose.

I only just turned 18 when COVID started kicking off hence haven’t had the chance to experience youth and travel, etc. It is something me and my partner both want to do but despite our good, full time jobs, I can’t foresee how we will manage to do this yet also save for a house? I am on a healthy salary for my age and so is my OH with overtime. We are in the north so not having London prices. I don’t know how others get on. I made the mistake of joining a Facebook group for people who travel and seriously can’t comprehend how people leave or quit their jobs for 3-6 months and just go round the world? Where does the money come from? How do you sustain yourself out there? I do appreciate the people in those kinds of groups probably represent an extremely small margin of society but all the same, it leaves me wondering if I’m boring or if they’re out of touch with reality Grin

It’s so hard to know whether to put savings for a house first, or trust that income will go up once we have fully progressed in careers and not to worry about that right now.

I would love to just spontaneously book Bali but also, responsibilities!

Thoughts?

OP posts:
newgateshead · 10/04/2022 19:36

Nothing is promised in life.

There may be a huge house price inflation and you won’t be able to buy anymore. You or your partner might have an accident and not be able to work anymore. A baby might not happen at the snap of your fingers just when you want it, maybe you’ll end up needing to pay thousands upon thousands for IVF to make it happen and you’ll be in your 30s anyway by the time you have one. All 3 of these things could happen, that’s life. Be financially responsible but you don’t need to plan out your life so meticulously like this.

I really strongly encourage you to go travelling. I’m in my 40s now and having lived 4 decades, gone through various life events and witnessed stuff my friends have gone through, I really think you should live and have fun whilst you are young.

Skinterior · 10/04/2022 19:38

We both got a nice redundancy put out at the same time and did it that way - we were much older though and we had to rent out our flat too

isthismylifenow · 10/04/2022 19:43

Imo you have your whole life to pay off a mortgage, when you are more settled and with DC it is more difficult to travel (in the cheap). I did it and I haven't suffered financially. I'm 50 now and have a house yes, like most my age. But I have been to 40 counties as well.

My dd is about to be off on her adventure. Will have money to start off with, and will move around and pick up little jobs along the way to fund the rest. It not luxurious by any means, so not staying in posh hotels etc. It's backpackers lodges, a couch, or the prize will be a job with accommodation offered.

I learned more life experiences whilst backpacking than I feel I would have if I had gone to university.

The world is open to go see. You may very well regret it if you don't take the chance while you can.

newgateshead · 10/04/2022 19:47

Also OP, one more thing. You say you can’t go travelling because you have ‘responsibilities’?

What responsibilities? You live in a rental which you can leave any time. You’ve have no kids or dependents. Your job isn’t a responsibility, you owe your bosses nothing, you can pack it in whenever and look into working abroad.

You’ve literally got nothing stopping you here.

ShanghaiDiva · 10/04/2022 19:49

We lived overseas for 25 years: 13 years in Europe so able to drive to many countries (ideal when the dc were young) and 12 years in Asia so long haul became ‘short haul’.

Blossomtoes · 10/04/2022 19:49

@Twinsmummy1812

You used to be able to buy a round the world plane ticket for about £2,000 with One World Alliance. We did it and took 17 different flights in 7 months travelling. Worked like a charm.
My son did that. Saved like crazy for about two years and travelled for almost a year. The last thing he had on his mind was buying a house.
cakeorwine · 10/04/2022 19:50

Once DS is older, then I have plans to do more travelling.

Just need to find a way to maximise income at the same time.

Sure there's a way

teaandcake22 · 10/04/2022 19:52

I lived at home, had a decent job and saved 12-18 months. Then came back, paid off some debt I had from travelling and then started to save for a deposit. Agree your young to save for a mortgage if you want to travel. Travelling is absolutely the best, I would recommend it to anyone. Good luck!

ForeverSingle881 · 10/04/2022 20:03

Priorities.The catch is they haven't decided to settle down and have kids so young. A baby is the end of all your adventures for a good 20 years. If you're happy to wait until your 40s, go for it. There's a lot of disadvantages to having a baby young just get it over with in your 20s.

Dontlickthetrolley · 10/04/2022 20:11

I was lucky and bought a house in the early naughties before prices sky rocketed. I've never back packed but I have always prioritised holidays, even now with 2 kids in tow (majority UK, but you need to start somewhere 🤣) . Pre children Australia for 5 weeks, Carribean, New York, Africa and loads of weeks in Europe in different locations. Since having kids, disneyland Paris twice and a week in Spain. I have a 6 year travel plan with 3 major locations so have been saving for our next big holiday for the past 3 years. At your age I'd be saying sack off the house savings and go and enjoy yourself, you lost your time to have fun due to covid, go and do that now.

RosesAndHellebores · 10/04/2022 20:20

I haven't read the thread op.
I bought my first flat at 21. I worked my socks off in my 20s and all my friends said I was mad and should be enjoying myself. They were all having 18 months in Bali, Aus, etc.

Met dh at 29/married at 32. As did many of my friends. I gave up work and we could stay in London; they said "oh you are so lucky it's not fair"

The harder you work, the luckier you get. TBF DH and I aren't that intrepid but between us have been to: LA, Boston, NY, Washington, Chicago, Hawaii, Kaui, Maui Shock, HK, Singapore, Australia, Montreal, Sri Lanka, and of course most of Europe!

PatientlyWaiting21 · 10/04/2022 20:25

I worked full time abs has a PT waitressing job. Quit both when I was 23 and went travelling for 18 months. Best thing ever!

givingupchocolatemonday · 10/04/2022 20:25

When I was 23 I was travelling Asia. Spent a fortune and don't regret any of it!
Your still so young plenty of time to buy a house.

newgateshead · 10/04/2022 20:27

@ForeverSingle881

I don’t understand why people have a baby just to “get it out of the way” or “get it over with”. It’s bizarre. Have one when you are ready AND you want one.

A baby is a lifelong thing, yes they grow up but you are a changed human being. Having one to “get it over with” sounds like you don’t actually want one at the moment but feel you are obliged to have one.

Porcupineintherough · 10/04/2022 20:28

Room in a shared house and not saving for a deposit was how I did it when I was younger. Then VSO.

SalsaLove · 10/04/2022 20:31

Hold off having children is my only advice. You’re only 20 and there is still so much time to do everything you want to do.

HomeprideSaucy · 10/04/2022 20:34

They're not trying to buy a house at the same time!

cjpark · 10/04/2022 20:35

I'd pack up and go travelling asap OP. life is too short. You're only 20 - hold off on buying, forget kids and save hard to travel.

RoseGoldEagle · 10/04/2022 20:43

I worked every shift going for a year when I was 27 and went travelling for 7 months at 28. Never regretted it. Had no money when I came back but slowly built up savings again. Am 40 with 3 kids now and am so glad I did it (and will do it again one day, but you can’t beat the travelling in your 20s buzz!)

kitcat15 · 10/04/2022 20:45

I travelled Europe, israel and eypyt in my 20s for 2 years....starting as an affair in France....stopping to work on a kibbutz in Israel for 6 months and fruit farms in several Greek islands, farm work in Sardinia , working at a diving school on the red sea...then finished off with a 5 month stint working in Channel Islands...this was the late 80s .....didn't get to the exotics places youngsters go to today....but stopped off at around 15 countries .....no regrets at all....got my first house at 25 which was about 4 to 5 years later than my peers as everyone bought young back then....but it was definitely worth it

ComtesseDeSpair · 10/04/2022 20:45

@RosesAndHellebores

I haven't read the thread op. I bought my first flat at 21. I worked my socks off in my 20s and all my friends said I was mad and should be enjoying myself. They were all having 18 months in Bali, Aus, etc.

Met dh at 29/married at 32. As did many of my friends. I gave up work and we could stay in London; they said "oh you are so lucky it's not fair"

The harder you work, the luckier you get. TBF DH and I aren't that intrepid but between us have been to: LA, Boston, NY, Washington, Chicago, Hawaii, Kaui, Maui Shock, HK, Singapore, Australia, Montreal, Sri Lanka, and of course most of Europe!

But equally, I spend thousands on travel and fun in my late teens and early twenties, still bought a London flat at 26, sold it several years later with enough equity to buy a London house and have kept on with the travelling and fun ever since. It doesn’t have to be either / or; and in your case, you also weren’t doing it with a partner, as the OP is. I know that a small number of people do spend the rest of their lives with the person they met at 18, but the reality is that most people do an awful lot of growing and changing between the ages of 20 and 30 and the likelihood of the 20-year-old OP still being with her DP at 30 is, quite frankly, not especially high. Best not to tie yourselves together with a house and babies young and make the separation so much harder.
kitcat15 · 10/04/2022 20:45

Au pair not affair!!

Kite22 · 10/04/2022 20:49

Because most 20 year olds aren't looking to buy a house and start a family.

It's priorities.

Evoll671 · 10/04/2022 20:51

I went travelling whilst young before settling down and buying a house. Yes it meant I bought a house later than most of my friends but I don't regret those experiences.

Bornsloppy · 10/04/2022 20:53

I never understand why people are so hellbent at buying houses in their early 20s - houses are just money pits, something is always sodding breaking. When I'm on my death bed what am I going to remember: an insane trip we made across Asia or how I brought an efficient boiler.

Anyway in answer to your question, we saved as much as we could, lived relatively cheaply for years in a rented flat, didn't buy a house or a car or have kids until our 30s, had a cheap wedding. We prioritised doing stuff rather than having stuff.