Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think kids have phones too young?

17 replies

Superunknown1 · 09/04/2022 23:39

Sure this has been done to death before but I’ve noticed it so much recently with my partner’s 10yo daughter. She has a phone that her mom got for her and it scares me that she could be looking anything up, she’s got a lot more attitude than she used to (not necessarily down to her phone use but it does correlate) and picks fights online sometimes and I just think it’s not the healthiest thing to be doing? I grew up w the internet and have seen so much awful stuff online. Plus the way kids can’t switch off from school because of texting, it’s constant and they can’t read the tone of messages well sometimes and it causes fallouts between friends.

Am I being unreasonable/uncool or is the fact that kids in primary school have smartphones terrifying?? What is a good age for a phone/what age did you get your first one? Am I simply worrying too much and need to get with the times? 🙃

Just pondering and wondering if I’m being overly stressy about it! I’m kind of strict when she stays here with phone use (time limits, no TikTok) and she sometimes thinks I’m a bit ridiculous/overprotective. I can’t remove the phone as her mom gave it to her. Just hoping it’s not just me being paranoid!

OP posts:
Original poster
Superunknown1 · 09/04/2022 23:41

Last line is meant to say that I hope I am being paranoid Blush

OP posts:
AHungryCaterpillar · 09/04/2022 23:45

Mine are 10 and 11 and have a Phone, they don’t have SIM cards though, I was shocked
The other day to hear of a woman whose 10 year old was in a “class WhatsApp group” at 10! He was being bullied in the group, good knows why parents would allow 10 year olds to be on a Class WhatsApp group, seems to be asking for trouble.

VyeBrator · 09/04/2022 23:47

What's her dad's view on it? Is he strict with her about it?

gogohm · 09/04/2022 23:48

Phones don't have to be a problem with adequate parental supervision, the problem is that they are given to kids as electronic babysitters

Whatwouldscullydo · 09/04/2022 23:49

I've said before, I wish schools would go back to homework diaries etc

I feel phones make what used to be a life skill, like organising yourself re homework, making sure you understand every befire you leave the class so you can do your homework, and planning around extra curricular activities, are all now a.massive source if stress. But it used to be normal behaviour amd.normal skills.

You meed a.smart phone in school now. Not only do you not have access to your homework app otherwise you have to.live with the fact that when you go back to school the next day you are miles behind the conversation, if you don't have one.

As adults we understand but 11 year olds just can't.

I feel it all puts them.in positions they shouldn't be in and it's impossible to police their usage 24/7

DoucheCanoe · 09/04/2022 23:49

I got my first phone at 11, not a smart phone though obviously.

My eldest got a non-smart phone at 10 as he had a long walk to school that he was desperate to do on his own. He got a smart phone at 12.

My youngest is 9 and desperate for a phone but won't be getting one until atleast 10 and I'll be accessing it/ using parent account until 12/13 as a rule (we've already discussed this).

I agree with you that they're not great and there is so much going on with them now compared to when I got mine that's makes it much more of an issue now. We just need to keep an open dialogue and explain the dangers/importance of keeping safe online.

XenoBitch · 09/04/2022 23:50

Maybe reframe the question.... why does a primary school age child need a smart phone?

Danikm151 · 09/04/2022 23:50

I think secondary age is ok as they will be travelling independently so will need to contact in an emergency.
Younger than that is unnecessary

Whatalovelydaffodil · 09/04/2022 23:52

@XenoBitch

Maybe reframe the question.... why does a primary school age child need a smart phone?
They don't. In fact, most people don't!
LondonQueen · 09/04/2022 23:55

There are children as young as 7 with mobile phones at the school I teach in. I got one at 9 years old but it was a basic blackberry.

NuffSaidSam · 09/04/2022 23:56

I wouldn't get a primary school aged child a smart phone.

It's ridiculous and unnecessary.

elliejjtiny · 10/04/2022 00:02

My dc get one when they start secondary school.

Original poster
Superunknown1 · 10/04/2022 00:07

Her dad was against it, but her mom had already gotten it before he found out. We are stricter as in we set time limits, and we are lucky she confides in me whenever there are issues, relieved it’s not just me!
My first phone I got at 10 but only had my family’s phone numbers in and no internet access at all, a slidey Samsung thing!

OP posts:
Bubblesandsqueak1 · 10/04/2022 01:15

Most of my ds 9 s class have phones i think its crazy my ds asked for 1 and I have said secondary school he can have a basic phone also seen alot of 7 year old with phones

Hospedia · 10/04/2022 01:23

Kids here tend to get them around age 8-9. From year 4 (age 8-9) school expects they'll be walking to/from school themselves and certainly by year 5 (age 9-10) when they go up to middle school, parents aren't allowed in the yard so the vast majority of the kids walk/bus by themselves or with friends. They get given phones (as did my DC) so they're contactable if needed.

Newhousesad · 10/04/2022 03:14

I believe that over 12 is fine personally

rolllan · 10/04/2022 03:33

I was very against a phone until teenage age, but got pressured into one and 10 year old got one. To be honest I'm quite glad as they were young enough to give privacy but monitor more with the groups and show responsibility before they were older and didn't want to show parents anything

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread