To be SO worried about pregnancy weight gain

[Hope90x]

So, usual story, lockdown was not good to me. I gained 2st in a relatively short space of time as I was unable to continue my 3x weekly gym sessions and of course indulged in too much comfort eating/drinking.

Anyway, I had slowly lost 1st however very much needed to lose another (if not 1.5st). Then, I fell pregnant, now currently 11wks and of course I am overjoyed as I really wasn't sure that this would happen for me (Thyroid issues).

The problem is, I can't shake this anxiety around pregnancy weight gain as I am still unhappy with my body image and when I was a stone heavier I was at my absolute lowest

My boobs have already doubled in size and I can feel myself gaining weight as I have been so exceptionally fatigued that I haven't been able to make my gym sessions.
I haven't had any trouble with sickness and don't expect I will do now at this stage.

Sorry, I'm aware this sounds utterly pathetic and I should be more focused on my beautiful little blessing but I'm so worried about feeling so low about my weight gain that I can't enjoy pregnancy or the early stages of motherhood. Sadly I am one of those people who's mental health suffers greatly when I gain weight, I have crippling self-esteem issues.

Any advice/tips?

Hey you don’t sound pathetic you sound like you have low self esteem and body image concerns that for some people will get worse during or sometimes after pregnancy

Please let your midwife know so they can support you with your weight gain concerns,
You might benefit from your GP referral to your local perinatal mental health team for the anxiety and difficulties you are experiencing

It's not all about exercise, it's mostly about a healthy diet which during pregnancy you might be more likely to focus on anyway, so try not to stress too much. Weight gain is not inevitable unless you're eating too much or lots of unhealthy food.

Hey op. Please please be kinder to yourself

I haven't had any trouble with sickness and don't expect I will do now at this stage.

That statement is alarming to read if I'm honest. Do you mean it would be a pro if you were throwing up because that would help with the weight?

Is this your first child? Your body will change in lots of ways during this time. Even if you weighed less when you got pregnant your body will still change. I know it's not easy when you're feeling bad about yourself already. Have you thought of speaking to a therapist to help with your self esteem issues? That will hopefully be a more productive use of energy, because it sounds like it's consuming you a bit. Congrats on your pregnancy

@Schmz

Hey you don’t sound pathetic you sound like you have low self esteem and body image concerns that for some people will get worse during or sometimes after pregnancy

Please let your midwife know so they can support you with your weight gain concerns,
You might benefit from your GP referral to your local perinatal mental health team for the anxiety and difficulties you are experiencing

Thank you, I didn't know there was such thing as perinatal mental health support so will definitely look into that.

@VyeBrator

It's not all about exercise, it's mostly about a healthy diet which during pregnancy you might be more likely to focus on anyway, so try not to stress too much. Weight gain is not inevitable unless you're eating too much or lots of unhealthy food.

I was doing well in the first weeks with cravings for fruit which made the healthy eating easier but somehow in the last two weeks this has totally changed to food aversions to anything that isn't beige and "Carby". I know I have been overeating in the last 2 weeks but I think stress triggers this in me. It's definitely the catalyst for me feeling like this tonight.

If it’s any consolation I gained 4 stone having 2 children with an 18 month age gap, lost all of the weight by the time the youngest was 2 and then got pregnant again when she was 4 and had 2 more with an 18 month age gap and gained just over 4 stone again - the youngest is now 2 and although I’m still a stone off my pre pregnancy weight (lockdown didn’t help!!) I am nearly there.

As others have said your body will change shape slightly but you can get back to pre pregnancy weight if you want to!

Looking back I have no idea how I ate so much 🤣 but I suppose with the small age gaps I wasn’t back to pre pregnancy weight before I got pregnant again!

@UmbrellaTime

Hey op. Please please be kinder to yourself

I haven't had any trouble with sickness and don't expect I will do now at this stage.

That statement is alarming to read if I'm honest. Do you mean it would be a pro if you were throwing up because that would help with the weight?

Is this your first child? Your body will change in lots of ways during this time. Even if you weighed less when you got pregnant your body will still change. I know it's not easy when you're feeling bad about yourself already. Have you thought of speaking to a therapist to help with your self esteem issues? That will hopefully be a more productive use of energy, because it sounds like it's consuming you a bit. Congrats on your pregnancy

Thank you for your kindness. I suppose in a way I did mean if I was sick then I wouldn't have had to worry about weight gain. I recognize that is unhealthy.

This is my first child and I suppose I'm anxious because people are generally negative about how pregnancy affected their bodies. I have had therapy once but it was for 6 weeks and honestly I didn't find it very helpful at all. Very generalised. I didn't really know where else to go from there.

And thank you, I really am delighted to be having a little baby I cried tears of joy for a week after I found out ❤️

Similar to pp I had 2 close together and ate so much rubbish I was truly massive. I lost 6st in the first year by having 3 meals a day, not eating any rubbish, and walking a couple of miles each morning with the pushchair and dogs.

@Matilda1981

If it’s any consolation I gained 4 stone having 2 children with an 18 month age gap, lost all of the weight by the time the youngest was 2 and then got pregnant again when she was 4 and had 2 more with an 18 month age gap and gained just over 4 stone again - the youngest is now 2 and although I’m still a stone off my pre pregnancy weight (lockdown didn’t help!!) I am nearly there.

As others have said your body will change shape slightly but you can get back to pre pregnancy weight if you want to!

Looking back I have no idea how I ate so much 🤣 but I suppose with the small age gaps I wasn’t back to pre pregnancy weight before I got pregnant again!

Thank you, this is comforting 💐 can I ask how difficult you found it to get back to pre-pregnancy weight? I do really struggle with excercise sometimes, particularly if I've had long breaks from it, I put it down to my underactive thyroid but maybe I'm making excuses.

Yabu. It's a shame your pregnancy is being blighted by this awful obsession. I don't quite know where you go to access it, but you do need some help with your mental health. Speak to your midwife as a first port of call?

Have struggled like mad after baby- he’s 3 in July. Weight didn’t want to shift. Just got a little off and 11 weeks with twins- focus is keeping healthy and exercising to keep myself fit but wow pregnancy fatigue with one is doubled! Better than it was though

I understand how you feel. I recovered from an eating disorder many years ago but some of the emotions came back in pregnancy. I ate well (I'm very disciplined about eating well now) and I gained "too much" weight according to the guidelines - went from 7.5st to 10.5st. I'm very petite so the difference was enormous, basically gained 50% of my original weight, I got PGP and struggled to walk.

18m after my c section and I'm only slightly above pre pregnancy weight and I'm choosing not to lose any more. So don't worry, keep eating well for your baby. You can focus on losing it after they're born, it's mostly fluids anyway. The post birth night sweats are insane!

Thank you all for your replies and sharing your experiences. It has reassured me somewhat.

I will just focus on eating healthy for now and then try to increase my activity levels as I feel a little better 🙂

I definitely felt the most bloated/out of shape in the first trimester. This really bothered me as I was post ED.

However once I got a bump, it's the most confident I felt in my body, EVER

I worried sooo much about this but found it easy to lose the weight with breastfeeding and wish now I'd wasted less time worrying and more time being amazed by my amazing body! Try to make healthy choices and you'll be fine x

I'm now a stone lighter than pre pregnancy weight at 14m post partum and haven't even really tried. Breastfeeding is amazing as is long walks with the buggy.

I don’t know how to properly reply!!! In all fairness the first couple of stone flew off quite quickly with me now doing a huge amount - eating sensibly and taking the baby out for lots of walks in a sling. With both weight losses I really plateaued after I’d lost 2 stone until I stopped breastfeeding (which I did until they were all pretty much a year old), the last couple of stone is really just watching what I eat - I barely do any exercise but I do have 4 kids and we live in a farm so I am quite active, I do often say I’m going to take up running but by the time all the kids are in bed I can’t be bothered!!! They’re 10,8,3 and 2 now so still quite young I suppose and my husbands a farmer so often works late so going to a gym would be a bit hit and miss!