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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for your best lessons learned as a SP

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Lux523 · 08/04/2022 14:06

Recently married. We share children on both sides.

I now have a SD13 and SS16. Neither children are particularly warm or enthusiastic about their Dad's new life, which I understand as their parents didn't have the best marriage and the divorce was very hard on them. They also have a lot of anger towards their Dad for leaving. He did not leave for me, we met after his Divorce.

I want my SC to feel like they're an important part of our household/lives and that we (my children and I), want to have a friendly and mutually kind relationship with them, which will hopefully develop into something deeper over time.

My SS says he wants nothing to do with me or my children. He can't give a reason, just that he doesn't have to be around us and so he won't be.

My SD has been very obviously upset with her Dad for leaving her Mum, this has then come out in her treatment of me and my children, she's been very unkind, mean and frankly, a bully.

My DH has definitely tried to discipline the recent unkind behaviour and he has tried a lot to talk with his children. I think they're in denial over mine and my children's existence.

I want to try and aim for unity, how can I do that as a step parent? For what it's worth, my children have a very close bond with my DH, the love is mutual. They are open and warm to my SC but they are increasingly noticing the horrible behaviour directed at me and them and my DH.

Step parent veterans, help!

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