Best place to live with special needs children?

[FatEaredFuck]

I have 2 children both with SEN and live in an area of the country where it's difficult to access support. The LA is sluggish, there is no charity set up to support parents and children etc.

Money no object, where in the country would you suggest moving to for better support?

Not Norfolk or Suffolk. Woefully awful provisions and sen schools totally oversubscribed. Many children travelling 1.5 hours each way plus just to attend suitable sen schools.

Friend in south Manchester seems to have decent support for her ASD children. I think as a very general rule of thumb labour controlled councils are better than Tory ones.

I live in Merton and have had very good support in getting EHCPs for my sons but outside of that it’s not so helpful.

There are several primary schools with additionally resources provisions but secondary is patchy.

If money was no object I’d look at a private school like Blossom House or Kingswood House in Epsom.

Honestly, nowhere is a good place to live - every local authority fights against SEN expenditure (because they’re all cash strapped) and in all but the most obvious cases you end up at Tribunal. But the area with the highest number of special school places per capita is probably Gloucestershire?

And what other support you have? Family etc nearby

Going against the grain here and sharing that our experience in Scotland has been pretty amazing.

We have:

A fantastic 1-2-1 in mainstream completely full-time

An amazing speech and language therapist who's engaged and super helpful

Full support with AAC communication therapy (DD is nonverbal)

Were offered an OT, but didn't accept

Support from a council communication team to the school and home

I truly think it's a postcode lottery.
We sold our home and moved council areas before DD started primary school because we were horrified after touring available facilities.

Her school is unbelievably supportive and have done miracles.

Use the money to pay for support, private education and all the things that would make your life easier - cleaners, gardeners, a fully accessible house that meets their needs.

There is nowhere that can support children with SEN any better than you as a parent with (theoretically) an unlimited budget.

That’s true when they’re young - but as they grow up, their parents are aging too. It’s good to get outside objective help if possible so the individual has an opportunity to cope long term.
My daughter has her own problems, one of them being that she is on the autistic spectrum. She wasn’t diagnosed as a child, and received no help.
We were told there was an adult autism service in our locality - turns out it works for 4 hours a week.
Unbelievable. So they have a massive waiting list, but can say they have an adult autism outreach service.
I just wonder if she’d had professional help younger - would she have been more receptive- and would it have made a difference to her life now

Nowhere. I'd just fund privately everything needed too.

I would imagine tgat, generally, a city would offer more options than a small village

And do your own research, so you know what is available. Don't wait to see what you're offered

Definitely not Essex. They are an absolutely appalling LA in terms of EHCPs and SEN.

We are planning to move away, free money from our house and put our autistic daughter in a non selective independent school

@nellytheelephant1980, Essex have gotten so much worse haven’t they. Our area lacks specialist schools and both my kids go to specialists in different counties.

[quote Ohquietone]@nellytheelephant1980, Essex have gotten so much worse haven’t they. Our area lacks specialist schools and both my kids go to specialists in different counties.[/quote]
Yes they’re hideous! The only school that would potentially suit my daughter is 1.5 hours away, and considering Essex fought me for a year to even issue her EHCP, they would be another fight and I just can’t stand it again. The tribunal destroyed the LA representative which was fun to watch. Essex conceded an hour before the tribunal but of course it was too late and it had to go ahead.
There are no provisions, no support. It’s so bad. So sorry you’re under them too

@FatEaredFuck

I fought for my dd to get any support, I think that's typical. Where I live now seems better, more affluent city - Bristol but she's grown up

I would say it depends on the needs of the child. Ultimately though it’s rubbish wherever.

@IBelieveInAThingCalledScience what council are you in? It's not East Renfrewshire by any chance is it? I've heard a few good reports from parents there. We are Argyll and Bute, it's just "ok" here I would say.

Any area that has excellent provisions is because at some point parent have been proactive in fighting for and setting various groups. People have campaigned and fought for more accessible transport and amenities in their area.

They have made the local issues known to their mp, petitioned government, got media attention, raised funds, gone down legal routes and much much more.

Systems have always been based on healthy children. Some are better than others and a lot still need improvements, just look at the ridiculous attendance awards that some schools still insist on whilst claiming they are inclusive. One good thing that do come out of corona is that schools for example can no longer deny children an education whilst they are at home, although of course some will have already gone back to thinking education can only be done whilst sitting at a desk in a classroom.

Camden/Islington can be good because they do share services and resources. But even then it's not all easy to access and families can still spend years fighting the system.

I'd honestly start looking at places that has a decent CAHMS department and schools that meet your needs. But anywhere if you don't already learn how to drive using the mobility part of dla/pip to finance a mobility car if needed. As even with decent accessible and frequent transport systems you will find yourself standing endlessly at bus stops far too often.

For the amount of money the LA spend taking parents to bloody tribunal, that could go towards the support for the kids. It’s utterly soul destroying. You fight to get the ehcp, fight to have it written in a way that isn’t totally shit and then fight to have what is actually written in it delivered. I despair of the whole system. I’d like to move when my kids finish education as I think we need to be nearer a city that provide more work opportunities rather than a posh market town.

@Ohquietone

For the amount of money the LA spend taking parents to bloody tribunal, that could go towards the support for the kids. It’s utterly soul destroying. You fight to get the ehcp, fight to have it written in a way that isn’t totally shit and then fight to have what is actually written in it delivered. I despair of the whole system. I’d like to move when my kids finish education as I think we need to be nearer a city that provide more work opportunities rather than a posh market town.

Absolutely this. Makes me sick.