What should I do?

[Harriet901]

Posting in AIBU for traffic. I am going to accept my stupidity here but here goes…I am 30 with 2 kids, I always assumed my partner asked me to marry him but he hasn’t yet, we have been together for 13 years. Anyway, if, to him, I am not worthy enough to marry, surely I am young enough to start again, but is it fair on the kids? Should I stay for their sake?

Yes I know your probably going to say I should have got married before kids but I didn’t and now I am in this situation. I have a job etc so haven’t given up my security?

I don’t think I can give me all to him if he can’t give it back?

I have a feeling that one of the ways that you are disadvantaged if not married is inheritance tax, Op.

My dh and I married after 30 years together for the legal protection, the vast majority of which as others have said you can organise outside of marriage.

It has made no difference to the way that we feel about each other, nor our commitment to each other.

Maybe check out civil partnership it gives rights ..but is not marriage!
Wills etc yes can all be changed instantly..
I would ensure that how you bought the house protects you if you do split up/ one of you dies.....you want your half to go to dc...
Next of kin equally changes things as dc get older when her dp died their daughter was nok as 18!

Many people are unaware that if you are not married or in a civil partnership you will not be automatically entitled to inherit anything when your partner dies. As an unmarried partner, the survivor will also have no say in important subjects such as funeral arrangements and the distribution of the estate
If unmarried partners have children together, and die without a will, then the children will inherit everything that their deceased parent owned.
If the children are under 18, whatever they inherit will be held for them in a trust until they reach adulthood. While this money can be used for a child’s benefit and education, a surviving partner will not have direct access to what is held in the trust. For someone who was financially dependent on their partner, this can cause serious problems in terms of what they can afford and their lifestyle. It may even threaten the security of their home.
In some cases where there has been no will, bereaved partners have been forced to bring a claim against their own children and other members of the family for financial provision.