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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to ask when and why it became the norm for schools not to allow juniors to make their own way home?

335 replies

RedHelenB · 02/04/2022 04:03

Seems they need parents to collect them from the class teacher up until y5 or 6 now, whereas a few years ago my dc orimary school.Just let them out at hometime and stonewalled home, somewhere collected by older siblings and some by oarents. Just one staff member by the junior entrance.

OP posts:
Chewbecca · 02/04/2022 08:35

I walked home on my own, well, with my friends, throughout infants and juniors in the late 70s. It was fun.

No rules at my primary school.

Lovemusic33 · 02/04/2022 08:35

My dc haven’t been at primary for 5+ years now, when they were there only year 6’s could walk home and a parent would have to call in each day to say that their child was going to walk.

EV117 · 02/04/2022 08:35

Surely it depends on the location. If the school is set around a housing estate or you’re just a short walk from home why wouldn’t they. Many children in year 4, 5, certainly 6 go and play outside and walk places with their friends why wouldn’t they be able to walk to and from school?

lollipoprainbow · 02/04/2022 08:36

My dd9 is badgering me to let her walk home alone when she moves to year 6. She's autistic though and the idea horrifies me.

Lieinrequired · 02/04/2022 08:36

If your year 5 or 6 child is walking home alone, are they going into an empty house? I am not worried about the walk home - busy area with several schools so plenty of children and adults around. At what age do you think it is ok for children to have a door key and go into an empty house and be unsupervised at home for a couple of hours?

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 02/04/2022 08:40

@Lieinrequired

If your year 5 or 6 child is walking home alone, are they going into an empty house? I am not worried about the walk home - busy area with several schools so plenty of children and adults around. At what age do you think it is ok for children to have a door key and go into an empty house and be unsupervised at home for a couple of hours?
DD will be one day next term... she wants to do a Club so won't be home until after I take her sister to her swimming lesson. I think last term of Yr6 (which she will be) will be perfect practice for Secondary (which finishes at the ridiculous time of 2.50...)
HeatherShiver · 02/04/2022 08:44

Mine were allowed from year 4, (market town North Yorkshire) and more or less the whole class did. This was just before the pandemic.

Sux2buthen · 02/04/2022 08:49

@Lovebroccoli

I walked to and from school on my own from age 5. This was in 1958. Society has changed.
Thank goodness for that
TheYearOfSmallThings · 02/04/2022 08:50

We are in East London and Y5 and Y6 children are allowed to walk home. Everyone lives very close to the school (like 5 mins).

Porcupineintherough · 02/04/2022 08:51

@lollipoprainbow obviously you know your child best but autism isnt necessarily a barrier to independence. Several of the autistic children I know are very rules focused, so once they know the rules about where and how to cross the roads, which way to go, not to speak to strangers etc they are far more likely to follow them than their nt peers. Ds2's best friend is autistic (ds2 is being assessed) and rigidity is more of a problem than reliability - if they say theyll be somewhere at a given time, they are. In fact, theyll be 10 min early to avoid being late. Nt ds1 and his friends are quite another matter...

MrsLangOnionsMcWeetabix · 02/04/2022 08:53

1980s Scotland and walked home myself from age 8. DS is 8 and school just let them out the gate from P4 onwards. The only reason he doesn’t walk at least some of the way home is some days he goes to a CM and I worry he’d get confused and end up heading home on one of the CM days.

Neongoddess · 02/04/2022 08:53

@Lieinrequired

If your year 5 or 6 child is walking home alone, are they going into an empty house? I am not worried about the walk home - busy area with several schools so plenty of children and adults around. At what age do you think it is ok for children to have a door key and go into an empty house and be unsupervised at home for a couple of hours?
No because I wfh. So he gets in, comes says hello, let's the dogs out, gets a snack and sits with the dogs watching TV until I am done.

I would let him be alone if I really needed him to be for a couple of hours. He goes to secondary next year, I will give him a key. Just incase

FoggySpecs · 02/04/2022 08:53

I would not let my DS walk anywhere alone, he is 11 and although his friends do it he is a liability, he is too dreamy.

FoggySpecs · 02/04/2022 08:54

He can be at home alone but not on the road.

user1471474138 · 02/04/2022 08:55

My dd, currently in yr 6, started walking to school on her own in yr 3 and then home from the start of yr 4. She wasn’t the first in the year to do so
and now hates it if I have to come anywhere near the school!
But equally her friends mum walks with her dd and has said she will continue to do so even at high school next year. Really think it depends on individual

MajorCarolDanvers · 02/04/2022 08:56

At what age do you think it is ok for children to have a door key and go into an empty house and be unsupervised at home for a couple of hours?

High school age 12 for mine

lollipoprainbow · 02/04/2022 08:56

@Porcupineintherough she just seems so young and not worldly wise !! I can imagine her panicking on the way home and I won't be there to help her !! Things might change though as she gets older, plus she'll be allowed a mobile phone then which she can call me on.

Flipflopssndsocks · 02/04/2022 08:56

For most kids year 5/6 seems right. Obviously it won’t hit I skids and some routes are more problematic than others. I find an assumption that kids need to be high school age part of the trend that infantilises children to their ultimate disadvantage.

user1471474138 · 02/04/2022 08:57

She has also this year started to be allowed to come back to an empty house a couple of times a week for around an hour

Clockstooforward · 02/04/2022 08:57

@mocktail

I don't agree with schools being rigid on this. Different kids have very different routes home as well as varying levels of maturity and common sense. Once at junior school it should be primarily a parental decision.
Agree with you 100% . Also how do they supervise every single pick up ?!!! It was only the infants school at my children’s primary which had any set rules about pickup. I used to always meet my children at the park right beside the school because I would have the dog with me. It was the general norm at this school.
kittensinthekitchen · 02/04/2022 08:58

Scotland. They expect P1 to be collected by an adult, but after that kids are given more independence. Even after the first week or two of P1, they encourage parents to wait outwith the school playground.

SnowingInApril · 02/04/2022 08:58

My DC’s school allows them to go by themselves from yr 6.
Having seen some of those children run across the road on multiple occasions, I won’t be letting my DC do that.

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 02/04/2022 08:59

I walked home at the age of five. I was neglected though.

I let ds1 walk home along a short, safe route at age 7, but ds2's school insisted parents collect them from the playground at that age even though we were parked in the carpark a few metres away 🙄 I don't feel it promotes independence.

lottiegarbanzo · 02/04/2022 08:59

When did it change? Probably in line with the increase in road traffic and at the same time as children have moved to doing more organised activities in the evening and at weekends, rather than just 'playing out' together.

Our love of cars has a lot to answer for. We have certainly, collectively, prioritised the freedom and convenience cars offer us, adults, over children's freedom to roam and to grow up independent.

A parallel question I would ask, is how many of us knew children who were hit or killed by cars, when we were in primary school? I remember one serious head injury in my junior school years.

Changes in rules and attitudes, even against a backdrop of increasing road traffic, have saved a lot of lives.

I never hear people seriously propose the opposite approach; a drastic reduction in car use and ownership for the sake of children's health, safety and freedom.

Buffalostance89 · 02/04/2022 08:59

In the 80’s, I walked alone from around age 8 I think 🤔 had to cross one road and down a passage and over a hill