To be annoyed at this? School/Bullying related

[TheyCallMeJune]

DS is 13 and was getting bullied at school in the term leading up to Xmas. After ineffectual complaints to his year head and form teacher the deputy head finally got involved and stopped it. We heard nothing else from school regarding the situation until today when his year head phoned me to check that DS is no longer being bullied.

AIBU to be annoyed that her wording was 'DS got himself into a bit of a pickle last term, how is he now?'. I'm annoyed because a) DS didn't 'get himself' into anything and b) Bullying is NOT a fucking 'pickle'

WIBU to also put her straight that he was bullied not 'in a pickle' during said call?

Schools are very good at victim blaming.

Yeah, victim blaming is their usual thing, even with SN pupils in some cases.

I hope your ds is okay now.

Yanbu - I can’t think of any incident at school which would be serious enough to discuss with parents which I would call a ‘pickle’.
Though it could just be poor literacy/lack of understanding of a phrase.
My mother once really wound me up when she said I was ‘throwing a wobbly’ when I was justifiably worried about something.
Just have all your dealings with the effective Deputy in future.

Yes. My own childhood was blighted by bullying and the impact of it lasted well into adulthood. It isn’t trivial. It ought not to be framed as the responsibility of the victim to manage - hence the completely useless directives to ‘stand up to’ bullies (generally they go in mob handed and kids who’d usually not get involved are too scared to do more than stand aside). It needs adult intervention, and anti-bullying policies with teeth. It’s bad for all concerned if bullying is normalised in childhood. I’d be tempted to ask the year head if it would seem quite so much of a ‘pickle’ if they had to turn up for work every day knowing they’d be subjected to anything from name-calling, ostracism and violence. I hope your lad is doing ok.

YANBU - you wouldn't say this about a burglary or mugging victim.