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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for feeling uncomfortable with being the subject of MIL April fools?

73 replies

JakeyRolling · 01/04/2022 16:31

My MIL April Fooled my BIL.

When she told me this I said I was uncomfortable she'd done that.

She said she didn't think I'd mind as I'm usually a good sport.

We have a DS and would like one more and while we aren't actively trying (ie tracking ovulation) we aren't not trying, but it hasn't happened yet.

She doesn't know this.

AIBU for being unhappy at her using my womb as the subject of her April Fools joke?

OP posts:
balalake · 01/04/2022 17:49

Awful, YANBU to be upset.

SnowingInApril · 01/04/2022 17:52

YANBU, I don’t understand why anyone would think that was a funny ‘joke’ to play.

MiL is a dick.

Vapeyvapevape · 01/04/2022 17:56

Mil: Op is pregnant
Bil: Oh that's great news
Mil:April Fools ! She's not really
Bil: Confused

She's an idiot.

Heyisforhorses · 01/04/2022 17:58

@WinniesHunny

At least you've got justification for going NC with the pathetic old trout.
Really? It wasn't a funny joke but it's not like she knew they are thinking about another child. I'd let her know I don't find it funny purely cos that's not my humour, but wouldnt be falling out with her over it. Its not a massive overstep (and yes I've had issues conceiving myself so I do understand).
Legoisthebest · 01/04/2022 17:59

That's a bit random because surely the average blokes response to finding out their sister in law is pregnant is "that's nice" and then not really giving it too much thought.

Afterallsbeensaidanddone · 01/04/2022 18:01

She sounds a bit desperate to be found funny and too immature to think of how that will feel. What fun for you!

RiojaRose · 01/04/2022 18:02

It might perhaps have been funny if she’d told BIL that she herself was pregnant. Just weird to tell him you were pregnant.

StoneofDestiny · 01/04/2022 18:02

That's not a joke. That's crass.

Futuroute · 01/04/2022 18:03

I would have expected any sensible person to realise pregnancy is too sensitive a topic for this kind of joke.

mummabubs · 01/04/2022 18:04

Not funny at all. Huge YANBU and she sounds deeply insensitive.

ManateeFair · 01/04/2022 18:07

@Nightlystroll

What did she do? Tell your bil that you were pregnant? If you hadn't been trying (which she doesn't know about), would you have been offended? If my mil had told my bil I'd broken my leg and I hadn't, I wouldn't be bothered. So I don't think I'd be bothered about a joke about my personal health. Maybe you're just understandably over-sensutive at the moment. But if she didn't know you it was something you were worried about, it's hard to blame her really.
I don’t want kids, so have zero sensitivities around pregnancy etc, but if anyone told someone I was pregnant as a joke, I’d be really pissed off. It’s in really dubious taste to use other women’s reproductive choices as a joke. It’s just unnecessary and a bit weird.

To be honest, I think it’s a really odd ‘joke’ anyway. What exactly would the BIL think about the OP being pregnant anyway other than “Oh, that’s nice”? It would only really be an OMG moment for a parent or grandparent, not an uncle.

OverByYer · 01/04/2022 18:07

Not funny. I hate pregnancy being used as an April Fools. Your MIL is an idiot

Topseyt · 01/04/2022 18:09

Not remotely funny, and quite embarrassing for you too.

I'd be telling her in no uncertain terms that it wasn't appreciated and that I expected an apology from her.

Watermelon44 · 01/04/2022 18:15

That’s on the same level as what my mil did to me a few years ago….

We went to visit for the day on April 1st and my (young) kids convinced mil to play a prank. They were trying to prank my dh (her son), but unfortunately they got me instead.

Mil put cling film over the toilet, and my eyesight isn’t great so I didn’t see it. I was desperate for a wee…..(well you can imagine the rest).

So my pelvic floor isn’t amazing after 3 dc and stopping mid flow isn’t easy, so it was pretty annoying as well as embarrassing.

They found it funny, I did not… I felt a bit bad for the dc really but I felt that as an adult mil should have said no.

WrongWayApricot · 01/04/2022 18:20

@Watermelon44

That’s on the same level as what my mil did to me a few years ago….

We went to visit for the day on April 1st and my (young) kids convinced mil to play a prank. They were trying to prank my dh (her son), but unfortunately they got me instead.

Mil put cling film over the toilet, and my eyesight isn’t great so I didn’t see it. I was desperate for a wee…..(well you can imagine the rest).

So my pelvic floor isn’t amazing after 3 dc and stopping mid flow isn’t easy, so it was pretty annoying as well as embarrassing.

They found it funny, I did not… I felt a bit bad for the dc really but I felt that as an adult mil should have said no.

That's an awful one Sad

The OP one I don't get though, it's not funny or April foolsy. But it's not something to go NC over? Am I missing something that makes it terrible? I think a toilet prank is much worse.

PatientlyWaiting21 · 01/04/2022 18:21

Are people still telling this “joke?” It wasn’t funny then, it’s not funny now. Super insensitive!

butterpuffed · 01/04/2022 18:25

Not only is it not funny, you'd need to have a strange mind to think of it Confused

Nightlystroll · 01/04/2022 18:25

The idea of April Fools jokes is convincing people that something really incredible/unbelievable/shocking has happened such as her being pregnant again.

No, its not. April fools can be all sorts of things. It doesn't have to be incredible, unbelievable or shocking at all.

Futuroute · 01/04/2022 18:31

Am I missing something that makes it terrible?

The OP is hoping to become pregnant, so it's in poor taste.

It's generally not something you should joke about because you don't know whether the subject of the joke might be struggling with TTC and be upset by it.

Watermelon44 · 01/04/2022 18:34

Yes poor taste as someone may be trying to ttc and sensitive or could have suffered a loss etc etc

Swayingpalmtrees · 01/04/2022 18:34

oh my, that is not even funny. What if you had an early miscarriage and hadn't told anyone. Dh needs to have a quiet word, it is not appropriate and I think most people would feel uncomfortable.

oakleaffy · 01/04/2022 18:37

@JakeyRolling

Sorry half a sentence disappeared - she told BIL I was pregnant.
@JakeyRolling That’s bang out of order. Not remotely amusing or funny.

April fools ‘Jokes’ as done by the papers&c are tedious, too.
I think there was one about having to train Police horses to avoid Trans and Rainbow flags painted on roads..
It sounded silly.

Topseyt · 01/04/2022 18:47

Am I missing something that makes it terrible?

Is that a serious question?

OP is ttc. There could have been any number of issues to which MIL could not have expected to have been privy, and which OP may not have wanted broadcast.

WonderfulYou · 01/04/2022 18:57

I hate April fools jokes anyway but lying about someone being pregnant is beyond a joke and is not funny or acceptable.

CharlotteRose90 · 01/04/2022 19:08

I don’t get the joke. Telling someone you’re pregnant isn’t a joke. I’m sick of the utter scum that use it as one. It’s hurtful and I’d be blocking her for it.