To think DM is trying to push me over the edge?! (Lighthearted)

[yyydelilah]

I'll preface this by saying I love my DM wholeheartedly she's an amazing mum and nan, but some days I do wonder if she's trying to push me over the edge...

An example of this, I'll call her and explain at the beginning of the call I can only chat for 10 minutes due to a meeting or dinner nearly being ready, but I just want to say hello to her.

She'll then launch in to a story with a cast of characters I've never met or heard of, and the tale will be in such excruciating detail I want to scream.

Literally ten full minutes this afternoon telling me about putting air in a tyre. What time she got up to go there, which parking space she used, how long it took to unscrew the thingy, where she's parked when she got home, how many cups of tea she's had since returning I couldn't get a word in edgewise.

As I say, this is lightheaded, and I do laugh about it, eventually, but dear God it's the same thing every time I speak to her.

She's not old, or bored or lonely. Just detail focused!

AIBU to think this is outrageous behaviour 😂

My mum likes to tell me in detail about her friends.

Who I haven’t met.

One of whom has passed.

She talks about them as though I meet them weekly for coffee and gets stressed that I don’t know what she’s talking about.

Mine is old. It can be 15-20 minutes before I get a word in edgeways when I ring her, I kid you not. Other than, 'hullo, it's me', 'how are you', 'gosh really, no, you're absolutely right, that's terrible', 'DID she, well I never!!' and the suchlike.

I'm glad it's not just me then!

It's becoming a running joke between me and DH. The absolute granular level:of detail is shocking.

I have taken to trying to prompt her to skip forward, especially when we've discussed the subject several hundred times before. But no we got from square one, with additional details added. Every. Single. Time.

Yep me to, I know all about DM next door neighbours who have split up, ive never even met them 😂

This is my brother
You and I could tell a story about walking down the street-‘I walked down it,nothing happened’
He’ll tell it with no details missing-from the leaves on a random hedge to the ladybird on the car he passed (and great detail about the bloody car)
I’m now nc-not the only reason but it was a relief

A recent addition to the story telling is a refusal to let me hang up.

Example, we've spoken (I've listened) for 20 minutes about nothing on my drive home. I park up and say okay DM I'm going to go now as I'd like to see DC before bed. She'll say okay...and then launch in to a brand new, loooooong story.

Before I realised this was a new thing I'd sit in the car getting more and more frazzled trying to wrap it up. Now I just say. Sorry I have to go. Right now. Speak tomorrow.

Poor DM find this very offensive but I'd be in The car until the kids were in uni if I let her carry on 😂

@Horaceandgus yes, this is exactly it! Such minute and unnecessary detail 😩

My db jokes that he can go to the toilet and return and dm doesn't even realise he's not been on the phone because she's in full flow!

I have a friend like this . Very hard to listen to as she goes into great detail , unnecessary to the story. Was in her house recently when her sister called in. She proceeded to tell her story in the same way ! Must be a family trait .

My mum used to do this. She’d do a complete run down about every tv show/ soap that she’d been watching. I had no interest in watching any of them but had an in depth knowledge of Coronation Street by proxy.
She died three years ago and I really do miss her nonsense.

Oh wow I had no idea so many other people had this issue!

You all sound more patient than me, I’ll have to work on it!

Do the stories also include sub plots about other things that the digress to before continuing the main dialogue?

I'm lucky, in that, I'm the one that calls, because I get one hour free with our plan. So, calls are max, one hour. Downside? They're always one hour, lol!

You are looking for different things here - she isn't trying to pass on information as an efficient message towards a goal of yours, she is trying to give you time/attention/interaction, like a monkey grooming another monkey....

My mother’s the opposite - talking to her is like trying to get blood from a stone. Most of the phone call is awkward silences. She’s even phoned me before, and then said nothing after the first “hello”. And no, not because she couldn’t get a word in, just that first “hello”, then dead air!

I really do get it, OP, but one day you will long to listen to her nonsense just one more time. I'm so pleased you love her and see the funny side of her chattering away, and that you indulge her. Make the most if it xxx

I can relate to this!

Mil like this too - but usually leaves out the answer to what you are asking. She went for a meal on Tues- I know almost everything about it. Who sat where, how late it was, portion sizes ! I asked how the meal was (stupidly), and still don't know if she actually liked the food or not!