Swapping god fathers to my son

[Lj99]

So my whole life I have had an incredibly close relationship with my cousin, we’re close in age & spent almost every day growing up together. Fast forward 23 years, i fell pregnant & when me & my partner done our gender reveal party we chose our god father and god mother. My son is now 17 months and we are thinking of getting him christened. Now I know the whole christening/god father/mother thing isn’t a massive thing anymore for people but since my cousin got with his girlfriend I haven’t seen or heard from him. He’s only ever seen my son 3 times in his life and yes we do only live down the road. I understand he works and everyone else has there own lives but surely to have a title in my sons life you should at least be apart of or make an effort. Not even a text to ask how he is. Am I right in deciding I want to change my god father to someone who has been around my son since day 1?

Have two Godfathers to keep the peace.

Both of my DS’ godfathers were pretty hopeless. One remembered some birthdays the other showed zero interest. The godmothers were sweet and have remained in their lives.

Ask someone else and possibly ask your cousin if he still also wants the role. Be aware that even someone who is around a lot in the initial stages can drift away very quickly.

I suppose whichever person you believe will be better at encouraging your DS to talk to about the bigger questions of life – questions about hope, faith and love.
Which one will encourage them to develop Christian values – being kind and compassionate towards others, being generous towards others in need with time or money and standing against things in the world that cause injustice and suffering.
Also of course a Godparent needs to pray for your godchild through the ups and downs of their life and their faith journey.
These things can all be done by someone who doesn't physically see your DS that often.

I suppose it’s a question of what did you expect or want him to do as godfather, and did he agree to that? A godparent is normally someone you appoint as the person to guide your child through the faith you’re introducing them into if you’re not able to for some reason, not a title you infer on them at the sex reveal. He’s only 24/25, work, socialising and his girlfriend will be far more important to him at that age.

You can have who you want as a Godparent ,neither of my kids see their godparents now

Have two.
Honestly if you want to keep the relationship appositive one it's not worth causing agro.

Despite being the same age, you've both entered very different stages of life & are bound to drift apart for a while.

The people who will be a constant presence & good role models for your son, will be there regardless of a title.

Also, some people struggle with very young children - your cousin may may be an amazing godparent to a teenage boy, not so much a toddler... Or he might be crap altogether, it's a gamble.

In Christianity you can have two male godfathers and one female for a male child. And vice versa for a female child.

Outside of Christianity it is an honorary title and you can have as many as you like.

I’d suggest that 17 months is not very long so why not keep the one who’s seen your son three times (in a pandemic that’s not bad) and add the new contender.

In Christianity you can have two male godfathers and one female for a male child. And vice versa for a female child.

In Christianity you can have as many of either sex as you want.

I think it depends on how strongly you believe in the Christian faith and what that means for being a Godparent. If this is more of an "honorary title" to you then just have multiple and keep the peace. If it is important to you from a perspective of Faith, you need to go with what fits that view for you and your family.

Hi OP, I'm a celebrant, and often do Naming Ceremonies where the parents have chosen several people as Supporting Adults for their child. I once did one where the parents chose everyone at the ceremony, as they were so set on having their friends and family playing a positive role in the child's life.

There are no 'hard and fast' rules here...so choose whoever you like!

Congratulations on your forthcoming ceremony...naming ceremonies (or Baptisms if you are having it in a church) are my favourite ceremonies to do 💗