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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Unfollowed on Social Media

49 replies

Opal93 · 28/03/2022 16:31

I know this is the epitome of a first world problem… and Similar to a thread I’ve done before. Recently two followed me on social media, one of these people I would consider to be a good friend. I know it’s just social media, not real life, we shouldn’t care but I do think many of us DO care more than we would like to admit when this happens. AIBU for feeling a little bit offended at this? Its happened a few times with people I am on good terms with as far as I know, and I don’t post anything offensive or political so just wonder what has upset them so much as to delete me. AIBU for wondering if I am posting stuff that upsets people?

OP posts:
FTEngineerM · 28/03/2022 16:51

God I deleted my own nan because of what she shares (missing man in Brazil from 2015) relax it’s not that deep

Saucery · 28/03/2022 16:51

Are you doing Wordle? I’m finding those updates incredibly tedious, even from good friends and the only way to stop them is Unfriend or Unfollow, unlike other online games in the past where you could choose not to see posts about that game.

User48751490 · 28/03/2022 16:51

@coodawoodashooda

That's why i don't do social media
This
VainAbigail · 28/03/2022 16:56

Which platform are you using?

Can other friends see their pages still?

It would suggest that you’ve been blocked and not just unfriended if you’re not seeing anything from them, can’t message them but others can.

BurntEnds · 28/03/2022 16:57

@Saucery

Are you doing Wordle? I’m finding those updates incredibly tedious, even from good friends and the only way to stop them is Unfriend or Unfollow, unlike other online games in the past where you could choose not to see posts about that game.
God yeah.. stop sharing your wordle if you are no one cares
OverWorking9to5 · 28/03/2022 17:08

@Saucery

Are you doing Wordle? I’m finding those updates incredibly tedious, even from good friends and the only way to stop them is Unfriend or Unfollow, unlike other online games in the past where you could choose not to see posts about that game.
Oh same, especially when a friend posts that she's pleased she got it in three and you've already seen somebody got it in two. Kind of a strange feeling passes through my head.
galacticpixels · 28/03/2022 17:17

Hard to know! Someone unfollowed me last year but they forgot to remove me from their followers - I only noticed because this made them show up my "people you don't follow back" list on Instagram.

DP saw a Tweet from that person the next day saying they'd deleted lots of people from Instagram that "don't interact with them enough" and it was "hilarious" seeing people try to follow them back who never cared before. So I guess it was some weird experiment to see who cared?

I thought this was funny as people were likely sending follow requests because she was still following them, and it was showing up in their lists like it did mine.

TunaTastic · 28/03/2022 17:17

I unfollowed a woman I like in real life.
She is lovely but her marriage is dull and her kids problematic in a dull way (first world problem or due to parenting eg ocd father produces nervous ocd kid)
I never minded her off loading stuff but I can't stomach the social media COVID update of missing hugs with this cherub or 'love these munchkins'.

It bizarrely made me dislike her and I'm not normally a misery friend.

Spectre8 · 28/03/2022 17:28

A 'friend' (no longer a friend) unfollowed me because I wasn't checking their posts enough and that meant I didn't care about them Hmm and ended the friendship completely because of that.

They didn't think to even check in if I was okay as it wasn't like me, I was going through dealing with suicidal thoughts at the time so wasn't really on social media.

If a person wants to determine a friendship is based purely on how much I check their posts then I think thats pretty fucked up to be honest.

McFuckSake · 28/03/2022 17:29

@Opal93

KrisAkabusi possibly so but as I mentioned, they have kept some friends in our group who post similar stuff to me (often with me doing the same activities) and she hasn’t deleted them
If you can't get to her page then how can you see she's still friends with everyone else? Surely if you can't access her page then you wouldn't be able to access her friend list?
something2say · 28/03/2022 17:33

I read a mumsnet thread last year which indicated how much people have changed regarding social media. As a result I came off fb and deleted most people beforehand.

Its not about you. Its about that person. And what they think of you is none of your business. Dont read into it. Maybe they are struggling. Maybe social media is too much for them right now.

IndoorsyImogen · 28/03/2022 17:36

Not U to find it a little hurtful, but it could be for any number of reasons. Surprised she didn't just mute you though that's what I do

Original poster
Opal93 · 28/03/2022 17:37

McFuckSake I asked mutual friends did she delete her SM and they said no, they still have her on it and she is very much active on it so that’s how I know

OP posts:
lickenchugget · 28/03/2022 17:53

Wordle updates
Political messages
Photos of mundane life
Daily photos of kids doing completely average things

Checking in every time anyone goes to a restaurant or bar etc
‘Repost you love the NHS/ I bet I can’t get 20 people to say I’m here for you if you need to talk’ posts etc

I unfollow for all these reasons and more, I am getting more intolerant with age. More than happy to meet up and chat in real life, but SM can be so boring and fake.

LazyDoll · 28/03/2022 17:58

lichenchugget snap. I unfriended and unfriended for these reasons and 14 months ago just deleted everyone and then ultimately came off all together. I don’t miss it at all. The expectation to know what’s going on with everyone just because they posted about it is gone. It’s changed my whole outlook. Wouldn’t go back.

oioimatey · 28/03/2022 18:02

Some people follow and then unfollow because they want their following to followers ratio to be a certain rate.

Maraa · 28/03/2022 18:06

I wouldn’t take it too personally. I used to have a ridiculous amount of friends on Facebook, I was the kind of person who would meet someone once and add them, that kinda thing. As I’ve got older, I realised I don’t need to see the life of these random people and decided to delete anyone off Facebook I wouldn’t invite to my wedding. It wasn’t anything personal but I like having less than 100 friends and only being updated on news I was actually bothered about. I have had a few people message asking why I deleted them and I was just honest, think one or two got the hump but that’s life.

VyeBrator · 28/03/2022 18:11

Why have you decided they've unfollowed you because they're 'upset'?

Crazycrazylady · 28/03/2022 18:29

I did a cull recently and was pretty cutthroat..
I got rid of

People who post daily ( no ones life is that interesting)
People who only post about their amazing kids
People who wish their partner happy anniversary / birthday when he is likely sitting beside them on the sofa
People who try and sell stuff
Contestant gym stats
People who most picture of their meals constantly Grin

The left over number was very small but makes much more interesting reading.I still would count some of these are friends, I just don't enjoy their sm content.

It's really not personal

Electrox · 28/03/2022 18:38

Maybe you're just boring?

Well done on the least helpful post on the thread 🏅

JudgeRindersMinder · 28/03/2022 18:42

@Saucery

Are you doing Wordle? I’m finding those updates incredibly tedious, even from good friends and the only way to stop them is Unfriend or Unfollow, unlike other online games in the past where you could choose not to see posts about that game.
Oh dear god bloody wordle-I hope they get bored of it soon!
DilemmaDelilah · 28/03/2022 18:49

I don't 'follow' any one but I recently had to hide posts from some body because there were just so many of them! I don't dislike her at all but I really don't care whether she had one sausage or two for breakfast, I don't want to see her memories from 2 years ago, and I don't care that her little dog has a new coat. I freely admit that I'm not a social media addict though.

Bessogon · 11/05/2022 20:21

Today, when we are isolated from each other, many lacks live communication. We try to make up with the help of social networks, posting photos of family, conversations with friends, and opinions on the current plan, which every day gives new reasons for discussion. But sometimes, we get bored with each other's content, and something makes us unsubscribe from each other on social networks. Many unsubscribe on social networks from people who, in their opinion, publish too much information about their personal lives. Others unsubscribe from people with whom they have different political views. Someone uses the strategy https://1394ta.org/blog/social-media-strategy/ due to a large amount of advertising, it loses old subscribers.

Alcibiade · 11/05/2022 20:36

Social media is not the real world. Stop treating it as though it is and you will be much happier.

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