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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think OH is a selfish c***?

39 replies

hadenoughofcovid · 28/03/2022 10:35

Not really a swearer but can't help but think he is a selfish knob!!

We've been stuck in the house with covid now which feels like years. I've finally got rid of it but DD & DS & OH are still testing positive.

He got me nothing from the kids for Mother's Day blamed it on us having covid. Even though he has been the one popping to the shops to keep the fridge topped up he could have grabbed one then or he could of got me something online if he wanted too. But no he stood and watched me in the kitchen cooking for hours yesterday at 39 weeks pregnant even though I was very uncomfortable.

He's got up this morning and has said he can't cope he needs a break from me and he's going to have a McDonald's breakfast with his brother so that's where he has gone now.

I just feel so shit I feel like no one appreciates me at all. I was trying not to get upset yesterday about having nothing and just blamed it on us being home with covid. But if he really wanted to make an effort he could have.

DS is 5 and he felt so bad he didn't even realise it was Mother's Day, he went and made me a card Sad

I just feel so fed up!

OP posts:
Howareyouflower · 28/03/2022 12:30

What amazes me is that only one person has picked up on the fact that despite having Covid the arsehole has been going to the shops and now to MacDonald's. THAT's selfish. If you've got any sense you'll leave him.

maddening · 28/03/2022 12:40

I had noticed the covid point but with the rule changes , whilst it is selfish it could be argued that it is allowed.

arethereanyleftatall · 28/03/2022 12:42

Yes, he's a selfish, thoughtless horrible man.

It is not your fault he's awful, that's on him, but you have made choices along the way here. Choices to have 3 children with him. Why? (And I am not judging because I did the same and am now divorced).

Why I did it is because I wanted a relationship and children beyond all else. Missed red flags all over the place. I wrongly thought a relationship, any relationship, meant success and happiness.

The choice I made to get divorced was the best one I ever made for myself and my children.

Your little boy is lovely now, but if he views the behaviour of his male role model day in and day out, his chances aren't good.

You still have future choices.

lifeuphigh · 28/03/2022 13:00

I noticed the covid thing too and thought it was extremely selfish, but what’s to be expected from someone who treats his wife like this?!

Sprucewillis · 28/03/2022 13:02

What a spiteful man. Sounds like he can't cope with you having any attention. Get yourself something nice from your DS and let him give it to you. It's all about the DM's and the DC's.

As for the DH. I hope he pulls his socks up for the arrival of DC#2 Thanks

HeArInGhandsgirl11 · 28/03/2022 13:07

@cstaff

It sounds like your little boy has a big heart which is more than can be said for his Dad. Hope he stays that way.

Sorry you had such a shit day but Mothers Day seems to be an "all or nothing" day depending on your kids or husband.

Agree, what a sweet little one

Sorry OP sounds like you had a crappy day! Take some time and relax

soootiredddd · 28/03/2022 13:09

He’s a twat for the Mother’s Day thing and for going out when he has covid
YABU for not caring about him “popping to the shops” when he has covid. Get online deliveries.

TheMarvelousMrsMaisel · 28/03/2022 13:10

Treat yourself to a divorce. Smile

HollowTalk · 28/03/2022 13:12

This man is utterly selfish and doesn't have your back. You don't have to do anything immediately but it would be a good idea to think about how a life without him would look, both emotionally and financially.

sillysmiles · 28/03/2022 13:22

But no he stood and watched me in the kitchen cooking for hours yesterday at 39 weeks pregnant even though I was very uncomfortable.

You need to be your own advocate first. Don't be a martyr please. I'm sure there was a reason why you had to but remember you need to take care of yourself first.

Ionlydomassiveones · 28/03/2022 13:25

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the poster's request.

incognitoforthisone · 28/03/2022 13:26

Yeah, there's no excuse to do nothing, Covid or not. He could have taken your little boy aside with his crayons and said 'Let's draw a nice card to give to Mummy tomorrow' and either cooked a meal for you or ordered in your favourite takeaway or something, at the very least.

skodadoda · 28/03/2022 13:46

He's got up this morning and has said he can't cope he needs a break from me and he's going to have a McDonald's breakfast with his brother so that's where he has gone now

What’s he going to be like when the baby arrives? Says a lot about him.

ChloeHel · 28/03/2022 13:50

@AgathaOvercome

He sounds awful but again I despair at yet another woman with a useless DH who is heavily pregnant. Please don’t have any more children with this waste of space.
Was going to say the same, all these threads about how awful and selfish their husbands are and how they have little to no help! Stop having more children with them. That increases the pressure on you and gives them even more of an excuse to get out of the house!
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