to wonder how much drink is reasonable?

[TabithaTwitchett]

Following on from the WS thread, I was in a bar last week where there were six week old twins in their pushchair with their parents and two empty wine bottles on their table. I feel guilty having a second drink when out with DD (1) most times. Is this acceptable or should I be glugging without shame?

How much you drink depends a bit if you are BF or not. As to the other people in the pub, do you know for sure that they weren't the last to leave out of a group who had drunk some of the wine?. Either way, what other people do is up to them.

I am not BF and I know for sure there were no other people at the table. Saying what people do is up to them is not really the point of the question.

How do you know the twins were six weeks old? . maybe the bottles were there before they sat down. Anyway, its up to them if they want to down a bottle or two.

I think you should concentrate on deciding how much you feel comfortable drinking rather than looking at what other parents drink!

I agree with the others, it's up to them how much they drink.

There are thousands of middle class parents out there who drink a bottle of wine per person every single night, but when it's done in the privacy of your own home, people somehow seem to think it's not as bad as when your in the pub doing it.

It could be that the man drunk most of it!

IMHO even one drink when caring for a child is unecessary.

How do you feel knowing were i there, i'd be looking at you with as much disapproval as you're looking at them.

Me and my DP often take our dd (ten months) out to restaurants/bars for lunch and we share a bottle of wine. We are not getting pissed!! I think it's good to be able to take your kids out and enjoy eating together. Ok, they were young but so what??

The last time we went out the bar said they had no high charis. It was not a problem. DD sat in her buggy at the table with us and ate her lunch without a fuss. I think its good to get them used to this sort of thing from an early age.

6 week old twins and they've managed to get out of the house?!!!!! Well done them is what I say! And I'm guessing they well and truly deserved the wine! Kaishay - seriously - are you saying you won't touch a drop for the next 18 years then?

Titchy - I'm not much of a drinker, i'm almost tee-total so even one glass of wine can affect me.

I happen to think that drinking while looking after a baby is as irresponsible as drinking when you're driving. Even one can impair your judgement.

Its just not worth the risk if something does happen, imho i don't need alcohol that badly that i'm willing to put my child at risk.

As for not drinking until he's 18.. dont be silly. If i want a drink, i'll have one, but DS will either be DH's responsibility or with my mother so we can both go out and relax.

Ok so you and dh wouldn't ever have a couple of glasses of wine at home, just the two of you while your dc was asleep?

The idea that moderate drinking in appropriate circumstances while in charge of your own children automatically places them at risk is daft.

If you are teetotal, or nearly so, Kaishay, then that's fine. It does not, however, follow that anyone who does drink alcohol is being careless of their children's welfare. Parents might neglect their children and some of them might do so in a way that involves alcohol but that's all.

I will drink around my dd, including out at a restaurant, but will not get drunk and I am quite happy that alcohol is a substance that it is legal for me to consume and safe for me, and my dd, to consume in moderate quantities (for me to consume, not for my dd to consume!. In fact, given that I do drink alcohol, I am absolutely determined to show my dd what responsible drinking looks like.

It might be unconnected but, in a family of my acquaintance, the parents were teetotal but their son often drank to excess as a young man. Perhaps he considered it "forbidden fruit"?