I’ve been such a mug 😢

[CharlotteRose90]

Been dating a guy for a few weeks numerous dates and we talk constantly when we can through phone and text. Neither seeing anyone else supposedly.

He was open when we met that he’d been in a long term relationship 10 years before that they’d bought a house together and we’re in the process of selling it after she cheated on him etc.

Stupid me fell for it. No issues on the dating front and then on Thursday after making plans for next week he told me that he was meeting his ex yesterday to discuss final decisions on the house that either she’d buy him out or they’d sell it.

Well yesterday happened and he rang me drunk saying they’d had a chat and that she wanted to move back in the spare room but not only that was he misses his old life and half of him wants her back.

I think he wanted her the whole time and I feel so used. Really liked him and honestly thought I’d met a decent guy. I’m not an idiot I know the moving in the spare room means they’ll get back together. It’s bloody obvious.

Do I wish him well by text or what? I don’t want to ghost him and be rude but I’m struggling what to say.

Aw OP I'm sorry, that sucks. There is someone better on the way for you. You don't have to reply, you could just block. Or a "thanks for letting me know."

He sounds like a nice honest guy. He told you the truth and didn't cheat on you. I'd say, "okay, thanks" then block him.

@VladmirsPoutine

You aren't a mug and he did the right thing. A few weeks really shouldn't have your feelings thrown into a hurricane like this. Just reply back saying "Hope it all works out for you" and leave it at that. The most important thing and I can't stress this enough is to not be dragged into any potential psychodrama over him still loving her yet developing feelings for you and feeling lost and needing to meet with you to 'see'. That way madness lies.

It was a few weeks but we both said we liked each other so I know my feelings are valid. This was seeing each other 2/3 times a week etc. Just makes me laugh as after the date Thursday he invited me to spend the night and I said no . I do wish him well we all deserve love in our lives and for him it’s her so fair play.

His name doesn’t begin with T does it?

@Marshmallow2419

His name doesn’t begin with T does it?

Nope it’s a W haha and he’s a police officer so I’m hoping it’s the right name 🤣

Does it make you feel better or worse that someone else (me) had the exact same dating experience, literally the entire tale was the same but a different name!
I’ve given up now too 😂

I would text something like-

Hi, how are you? Just wanted to thank you for being honest with me the other night. I wish you both all the best. Take care x

Of course you don’t owe him anything but I think it’s nice to be the bigger person, and you can walk away without feeling you didn’t close the chapter.

Bit of a generalisation, but I’m going with it, you probably dodged a bullet there anyway OP, every police officer I know is / has been unfaithful! It’s a notorious profession for it. I might be a little bitter - having picked up the pieces of my poor friend’s shattered heart when her policeman DH upped and left her for OW

@Marshmallow2419

Does it make you feel better or worse that someone else (me) had the exact same dating experience, literally the entire tale was the same but a different name! I’ve given up now too 😂

Oh no. Actually it makes me feel worse that you’ve been through it too. Men are shits. I’ve given up for a while.

@NellyDElephant

Bit of a generalisation, but I’m going with it, you probably dodged a bullet there anyway OP, every police officer I know is / has been unfaithful! It’s a notorious profession for it. I might be a little bitter - having picked up the pieces of my poor friend’s shattered heart when her policeman DH upped and left her for OW

Sadly he’s not the first officer I’ve dated . So I know their reputation and most of it is true. My ex was an officer and left for another woman