Covid

[Stirling2701]

Last month I met up with an old friend who has made racist comments which have bothered me in the past, but we go back a long way so I have ignored them. I have had three Covid vaccinations and my husband is clinically extremely vulnerable so I am being very careful. I had been under the impression that she too had been vaccinated although she does not wear a mask. Halfway through our meal she told me that she had not had any vaccinations; did not wear a mask; and has never taken a test. I had purposely done a test before meeting her so that I would not put her at any risk. She now wants to meet me again but another friend said that she had been very selfish and I should not go. AIBU?

The racism needs to be called out! The covid thing wouldn’t bother me so much but I understand why you’re anxious. Most people I know have ran out of tests so no one would know if they had it or not if it wasn’t for the stash in my garage from work I’ve been handing out!!

The racism would bother me greatly.

The Covid stuff not so much.

At the end of the day only YOU can decide whether to continue with the friendship. No one else.

I’m triple vaccinated but would have no issue meeting someone who wasn’t.
The racism would be the dealbreaker

I've got a racist friend, and whilst I think she's entirely wrong, I don't fall out with people because they hold stupid views. Many people who hold stupid views have been manipulated for someone else's political ends, and/or have a psychiatric condition that makes them pitiable.
I would not look kindly on someone who wilfully endangered my husband though.
Now you know she is such a risk to him, you could insist on only meeting outside perhaps?

They sound horrible with the racism. I'd end a friendship for that alone.
However, in terms of Covid, it's everyone's choice. To be vaccinated or not to be, to wear a mask or not- if you feel uncomfortable to be around people who have not been vaccinated, that's your own personal choice and risk assessment to make.

@MarthaFokker

The racism is a red herring here. Not everyone you meet will have had Covid vaccinations or taken a test, in fact there will be a huge number of people who haven't.

How are you going to get through life if it bothers you to this extent? Did flu bother you to this extent? I assume that would be just as bad if your DH caught it?

Flu is nothing like Covid for someone who is cev. Those who are still on the cev list and their carers have been advised to avoid contact with anyone who is unvaccinated. How the fuck we're supposed to know who those people are though I don't know.

Thank you all for your comments. My husband has COPD so is very vulnerable. She gave me the impression that she had been vaccinated but I guess I must have misinterpreted her. Silly me. I still can't decide whether or not to meet her in June. Incidentally she has told me that she is autistic which is why I make allowances for her.

"... an old friend who has made racist comments which have bothered me in the past, but we go back a long way so I have ignored them."

Pathetic. If you'd done the right thing and ditched her as soon as you found out she was racist you wouldn't have this side issue of her vaccination status to worry about.

She probably has few friends because the rest of them had a bit more backbone and called her out on her horrific opinions.