To go away with just one child...

[Tealember]

Hi all,

So I have a dilemma.

Partner and I have one son each from previous relationship (DSS 15 and my DS 12). We have a 2 year old together.

Partners dad lives 50/50 UK and in their second home abroad. However since Covid it's more 70% abroad.

Before being with me partner would visit around 6 times a year.

Here's the dilemma. He wants us to go and visit his dad next month but just me, him and our DS. Not the older 2.
His dad is 89 and partner is ways worrying he may not get to see him again every time he leaves.

Several reasons

1. Cheaper out of school time
2. It's not a holiday as such but he wants to visit his dad.
3. The youngest has to come as we have noone to leave him with.

I have an issue with my son being left out, so I'm worried my DS will feel he's missing out on a holiday. He would always day he wants to go away.
We have looked at us all going, which is a lot more expensive. However realistically it would be a bit of a disaster.
DSS hated leaving the house or going out for food and addicted to tech (honestly just the weekends are a disaster).
Plus the Vila is in the middle of nowhere, when we have gone historically we just stay at the villa and use the pool. When we go, it won't be hot enough for the pool. So the kids won't have anything to do.

My partner thinks it's simple and I shouldn't have an issue going as it's not a holiday as such and his eldest isn't coming.

I feel stuck as I feel bad going but my partner really wants to go with our son to see his dad (hasn't seen him in 10 months).

So, what do I do??

Let your partner go alone it’ll be cheaper?

Do the boys normally live with you?

I’d let your partner go alone, you can leave your child out as he will feel massively abandoned since he lives with you.