Social media with your true reality.

[ChocolateIsAlwaysTheAnswer]

People always say social media is just the highlights of people's lives. So am trying to test this theory. What would people think if they viewed your social media and what is the reality?
I don't post much but the other day I posted a photo of myself in my friends garden. I look very happy and glowing in it. The reality is I was feeling extremely anxious and unhappy yet you would never know by looking at that photo.

Mine is true to type. I post the odd thing, far less than I used to when it was more of a novelty. It's all cats and crafting. It's just me. The odd family social. Who wants to see someone's messy home though tbh. I like seeing people having fun, think it's sad if you weren't really but just pretending.

Mine strongly implies I spend my entire life on horseback. Obviously one has to dismount occasionally to sleep, but it's actually not that far from the truth

That I do a lot of walking in beautiful countryside (It's true actually)

@ohCARP

I don't have Facebook or Instagram so I probably come across as grumpy and anti social. Which would be correct 😂

Well, I don’t have either, and while I’m intermittently grumpy, I’m pretty sociable. I just don’t post about my sociableness.

I very rarely post but I get tagged in things a few times each month.
If you were to look you'd think I have a charmed life - lots of posts of days / night out, holidays, romantic nights away, lots of time with nieces, nephews, siblings, parents, friendly relationship with colleagues.

The reality is that I push through anxiety to do a lot of those things. I was in debt until 2 years ago. I would love to have children but infertility has made it very unlikely to happen, and a lot of the trips / holidays etc are planned in to distract me from rubbish test results / treatment failures.
I spend a lot of time with family but we're not close enough for me to have told them about my fertility struggles.

@Charette actually this is true. I am very sociable with close friends. I'm just at the stage now where I can't be bothered to make too many new friends haha

@CatLikeEyes

That we're a happy, close family that do a lot of activities together.

Reality, I worry my kids see too many arguments. I'm unhappy in pretty much every part of my life. I don't know that I can live like this for much longer. I don't know how to get us out.

After reading a friends SM I realised I didn't announce to the world that my DD has Covid .... then realised I could have had loads of support and nice comments wishing her better....that might have helped !!! NOT!!!!

[quote ohCARP]@Charette actually this is true. I am very sociable with close friends. I'm just at the stage now where I can't be bothered to make too many new friends haha[/quote]
Alas, I moved countries in 2020, had a house move fall through, and spent most of two years moving around — so I’m still in full on post-Covid ‘find new friends’ mode!

But I’m meeting some wonderful people whom I feel lucky to have in my life, so I’m not much to be pitied.

@Notdoingthis

I don't understand why people are bothered about other people only posting the positives. That's normal. Why would I post if I had an argument with my husband or skipped dinner because the kids take ages to go to bed? Who cares about that? I want to see and celebrate and share in my friends' hobbies and achievements and happiness. I am here for them if they need me, but I don't need every friend to know all the mundane, boring bits of my life.

I agree. I think, for the most part, that the argument ‘You only see the positives on social media’ comes from a good place; it’s meant to reassure people that they don’t need to negatively compare themselves to others. But there are some people who say this as a criticism; they actively want to make a point of saying ‘Their lives can’t be that great’. Well of course no one’s life is great all the time - but why would you feel the need to share every average moment of every average day?

That I'm a grumpy,boring,antisocial,snarky fucker with a lot of issues and I love my daughter very much.

It's all true.

Personally I want to see people's highlights and best bits- luxury holidays, beautiful house, lovely garden, cute dc/gc and pets, great night out, gigs , posh meals, days out somewhere pretty, a great cake they've made or piece of artwork etc.

I get very bored seeing breakfast/Sunday roast photos, hospital appointments, nails/hair/make up/tattoos, moaning, anything work related, or checking into the same place every week.
I enjoy the escape bits.

I rarely post on social media but it’s normally of holidays, home decorations, eating out, days outs, or random memes

Social media - confident, have a care free attitude & no worries. Spontaneous. Always going for adventures outdoors with my family.

Reality - anxiety ridden & have to really build myself up sometimes to venture outside. Cry a lot. Overthinker.

@Dameputtingonabraveface

I do not do social media. Teen DD does and is under strict instructions not to show the general chaos! I am always suspicious of proper grown ups who need to post everything and convince the world their family life is amazing. The making memories posts make me question why they are not fully engaged in a family day out rather than trying to create photos for people who do not really care and are just doing their own thing. Same with posts of Christmas trees, baking with children, family walks. Lovely but really not something out of the ordinary that really needs drawing attention to. To be fair, only a certain type engages in this madness but they are unstoppable.

This is exactly how I feel. How it ever became normalised boggles my mind. The posts wishing ones own children happy birthday with a photo montage mystifies me too. Why not wish the person you live with happy birthday in the flesh privately? "To Johnny, the kindest sweetest son a Mother could ever ask for. I love you." Just why!? Boke.

Of course people only put the best bits on social media, who wants to look at piles of dirty washing, or trudging into work. My Facebook has lots of beach photos and pictures of my cats looking stupid, and days out. Which is a fair enough representation of my weekends, but I don't think any of my friends and family want to look at pictures of my dinner, or my commute. I do try to ration pictures of my pool though ( I am in Oz, its normal not posh), as my mates back in Ireland and the UK take the piss.

I post highlights, which are genuine moments that made me laugh or smile. My children were babies in the early days of sharing from camera phones so there was a lot of that. As they've got older, that's naturally dwindled and I ask if I can share. There's a lot of nice scenery from runs. Moments when I've had dumb fails (I have a lot of friends like that too) Posting has gone down with time. Probably one or two updates a week? I'm more active in groups than my own status.

Back when I did bump pictures, there was a certain spot where I could set up the camera and stand. On one of the last ones someone commented on DH's pants on the floor... I couldn't bend down to deal with them