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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have refused to take DD to A & E

269 replies

Polarbearstar · 21/03/2022 12:16

‘Refused’ sounds more aggressive than it actually was, but DD has not really been quite right for a while now with a perforated ear drum, high temperatures, cold, streaming nose.

Doctor keeps saying to take to A and E and I am unclear what A and E can do that they can’t?

OP posts:
user1477249785 · 21/03/2022 12:17

Ummm. Your GP says you should go to A&E? Yes, yabu

Sebastianthecoo · 21/03/2022 12:18

Has the GP seen the child? If so then I’d imagine they would send you with a letter outlining their concerns.

If not YANBU

Littlemissprosecco · 21/03/2022 12:19

They can do blood tests and other tests and get quite wick results, to check that there’s nothing else going on. If it’s on the doctors advice, I’d go

LongCOVID · 21/03/2022 12:19

Sorry to hear your DD is unwell.
If you GP has advised you to take her to A&E, I would suggest you go. They will be able to access other services within the hospital and get more specialist support quickly. It might be that it ends up being something the GP could have dealt with, but unless it is checked they might not know. The GP doesn't have access to the imaging, tests or specialist knowledge that the hospital will.
If I was you, I would take her to A&E (and I'm generally reluctant to head to the hospital unless essential).
Hope she gets better soon.

thehistorymum · 21/03/2022 12:19

Doctor keeps saying to take to A and E

YABU

VelvetChairGirl · 21/03/2022 12:19

if the GP says take her then take her.

Mummytobe93 · 21/03/2022 12:20

How old is your DD?

RedHelenB · 21/03/2022 12:21

Yabu, if the Dr has said that take her.

Original poster
Polarbearstar · 21/03/2022 12:21

This is what is baffling me.

No letter, it’s just that if symptoms continue to go to A and E.

@user1477249785 on the face of it it does look like I’m being most unreasonable, but the problem is when this happened before, we ended up stuck at A and E for hours and hours only to be seen in the early hours of the morning with the same treatment the GP had given us. I’ll admit, I’m completely lost with the current healthcare system. Nothing seems to make any sense at all.

OP posts:
MalbecandToast · 21/03/2022 12:21

Is this a wind up?! Confused

Emelene · 21/03/2022 12:21

It’s pretty dodgy ground from a safeguarding perspective not taking your child to hospital when you have been advised to do so by a medical practitioner… is there more to this story?

Original poster
Polarbearstar · 21/03/2022 12:21

@Mummytobe93

How old is your DD?
16 months
OP posts:
vodkaredbullgirl · 21/03/2022 12:21

Gp say take her, then go.

Rainbowx · 21/03/2022 12:22

Yes very as your Dr has said take them

Whinge · 21/03/2022 12:22

Another one saying YABU. Doctors / GPs don't say go to A+E for no reason. If they're suggesting it (and it seems like they've suggested it more than once) then you should listen.

Whatdramain2022 · 21/03/2022 12:23

I'm guessing that your GP is worried about her hearing. Take her to A&E.

Original poster
Polarbearstar · 21/03/2022 12:23

No, it’s not a wind up, I’m hoping someone can help me understand.

To be clear, she hasn’t looked at her and said ‘she must go to a and e now’, she has said that in future when her temp goes up or her ear leaks to go to a and e, but a and e say the same as the GP.

If there are safeguarding follow ups (there won’t be) I’m happy to justify my point but what I’m really about here is trying to understand why we are being sent to A and E.

OP posts:
MrsSkylerWhite · 21/03/2022 12:23

Your 16 month old is sick, doctor says A&E and you’re refusing?
Yes, yabu. Obviously.

thebellsesmereldathebells · 21/03/2022 12:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Original poster
Polarbearstar · 21/03/2022 12:25

@Whinge the problem is that historically, they have. Perhaps they were sending to A and E with a particular intent but this wasn’t conveyed to me or the staff at A and E, so I literally sat for hours with an unwell child before being told identical information that I’d heard a few hours earlier.

Clearly everyone else is none the wiser. I am lost with what’s going on and why.

OP posts:
Xmassprout · 21/03/2022 12:25

A+e can do more extensive testing, they can get a specialist to look over her, they can do bloods with results expected back within a couple of hours.

00100001 · 21/03/2022 12:26

Jeez, your baby has a consistently high temperature, the GP has said take then to A&E and you think you know better??
If you're right as nothings wrong, you'll have just been hanging around for a few hours and being sent home with nothing being done...

OR

Maybe they will be able to do blood tests, give better anti biotics, admit her, identify the cause etc.... And actually get her well.

I'd rather go and be proven right and have a grumble on MN, than not go and be proven wrong....

Cherryblossoms85 · 21/03/2022 12:27

I think my favourite part of how the heallthcare system currently works is the constant refrain of "There are no appointments with the GP today or for the foreseeable future. If you're concerned about an urgent issue, please go to Urgent Care". It's indeed baffling - what's the point of GPs at all? Just dishing out a bit of HRT and that's it?

IDidntKnowItWasAParty · 21/03/2022 12:27

Wtf is wrong with you OP - your baby is ill, Gp tells you to take them to A&E, yet instead you come on here?! Jesus wept, your poor child. Go to A&E.

Original poster
Polarbearstar · 21/03/2022 12:27

I will take her to A and E when there is an accident or an emergency, of course.

I think people are completely and deliberately misunderstanding.

The doctor did not look at her, gasp and say ‘A and E! Now!’

The doctor looked at her, said what the condition was and diagnosed some antibiotics but said that in future to go to A and E with her, ie for routine childhood illnesses, not life threatening emergencies or things that clearly can’t be dealt with at the GP (ie broken bone.)

It would seem no one else has any idea either.

OP posts:
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