To be f*cking terrified 😢

ElfAndSafetyBored · 20/03/2022 22:30

I’m really sorry you are feeling like this. Can you talk to your mentor?

stunurse · 20/03/2022 22:33

Beta-blockers for nerves as a short term fix?

Whereverilaymycat · 20/03/2022 22:33

Is there someone you can talk to about your worries? Your mentor? My experience of being in difficult situations like this (I have an anxiety disorder) is to take all help offered and then keep trying. The only way you’ll get better is with practice and they should be able to support you with this.
You’re far from alone with this kind of thinking. Try not to force yourself to toughen up. It’s confidence in yourself you need. By what you’ve said, your sensitive nature could be a real asset in the future when dealing with people in your care.

Shinyandnew1 · 20/03/2022 22:36

Speak to your mentor. Are you doing medicine or is it something else?

AlizeeEasy · 20/03/2022 22:38

I’ve not been in your exact situation but I have experience of being nervous about speaking up in work meetings. I have grown in confidence more recently and for me it’s about being knowledgable about what I’m talking about, I’m not a fake it till you make it person, I have to know for sure what I’m saying.

Some other tips that might help:

Being easy on yourself and practising as much as possible, the more times you do it the more natural it will be.

Therapy which is specifically about helping with anxiety, hypnotherapy or cbt could really help

Being honest with your mentor about how you are coping, they may have some really useful tips

I wish you the best of luck with it, anxiety can be crippling, but it doesn’t have to define your life

Iknownothing · 20/03/2022 22:41

Is there anyway you can practice with family and friends - just to build up confidence. Maybe start with very close family and then broaden out to people you’re less close with so they’re almost strangers but not.
Definitely talk to mentors or tutors- you’re there to learn and they give you tips. Hang in there - this is the purpose of these - to practice.

watchingthedetectives · 20/03/2022 22:45

At the beginning it is like acting/performing and some people are naturally better at this than others. If you are not then this is very stressful

After a while it gets easier as really it is just talking to people and knowing what questions to ask and tests to do. Once you get used to it and the performance element goes you will be fine. A lot of how well you do is just a combination of experience and pattern recognition and you just have to persevere and you'll get it

Just keep going

Breaking it down and reframing in your mind what you are doing also helps

Good luck

WorryMcGee · 20/03/2022 22:50

Oh OP, I know how this feels. I was like it too. Not especially shy, can make small talk, not particularly introverted especially when I know people, but if I was dealing with someone in a professional setting - I’d just break down. Face started to go hot, heart would race, couldn’t get words out and then the tears would come. I was even worse if it was a role play exercise for some reason, which makes no sense at all as it’s not even real! Written exams/work - not a problem. I studied law.

What helped me: rescue remedy drops (I was skeptical but it worked! Didn’t turn me into a super confident person but it took the edge off so I could relax into it a bit more and get through the class. The more I got through, the better it got over time and I passed the modules I needed to pass) CBT (for other anxiety issues but the tools are transferable) - and age, unfortunately.

I ended up working as a police officer for nine years and now I’m in a similar job where I spend a lot of time interviewing people - sometimes very difficult/senior people - but if you’d met me at uni you’d never in a million years think I’d be capable of that.

You CAN do it and the empathy you’ll have for others when you conquer this will be an asset. Good luck x

Kego · 20/03/2022 22:51

You can do this. You really can. Is this where your passion lies? Patient facing? Have a long think about your skills and how you want to apply them. If it will include patient facing work, that’s a skill all in itself, that needs to be built on. Sometimes it’s easier to remember your practical skills and be SO confident in them, everything else becomes easier because you’ll doubt yourself less and the small talk is just dependent on the chatiness of the patient

frostedfruit · 20/03/2022 22:55

You just have to keep doing it, over and over again. The more you do it, the less nervous you'll be, until eventually its a piece if piss.

Do more, do extra, keep going!

Antigonads · 20/03/2022 22:56

Is patient facing for you?

Looubylou · 20/03/2022 22:56

Do you suffer from anxiety at other times? If so, time to speak to your GP. Would you be better if your mentor wasn't on your shoulder constantly - so you can practice talking to patients without the pressure of being judged? . It's easier to put a professional act/face on then - and you've got to do it as there is nobody to step in. The more you do it, the more relaxed you will feel. Be honest with your mentor.Another approach is be honest with patients - tell them you need practice chatting with patients. There are always patients who love talking about themselves. Get over the notion that you have to know what you are talking about - you are learning. Everyone has to fake it 'til they make it, whilst practicing in a safe environment. You can do it. You don't have to be perfect or even close - you are a student. Be willing to step out of your comfort zone and accept everyone makes mistakes and looks silly sometimes. Good luck.

nuttybiscuit · 20/03/2022 22:56

by username i think heart specialist training or something

sadly i cant advise op, but i wish you all the best of luck, some great points on this thread.

Haveyoubrushedyourteeth · 20/03/2022 22:58

I've got uni age children OP and as I tell them, they're there to learn - they're not expected to know how to do everything straight away, otherwise what would be the point in them being there.
You're clearly good at exams and retaining knowledge, don't dismiss that. Give yourself credit and appreciate that others around you are probably struggling with both the knowledge and the patient interaction, so how lucky are you that you're only really worried by one of those elements.
Everyone feels overwhelmed at some point during their degree, it's completely normal I promise. My dd is also very clever, and the first time she came up against something she wasn't a natural at it knocked her confidence completely. It happens to everyone, some people are in primary school, some doing their degree - You'll get through it though by talking to your peers/parents/tutors, and you will get better with practice.

polarbearoverthere · 20/03/2022 22:58

Hey, sending a big deep breath your way!

It sounds like I might have done a similar training to you and I promise it gets easier with practice. A helpful exercise might be to reflect on what your expectations are for yourself in these patient interactions; what pressure do you put on yourself that you could be more aware of and negotiate?

In the short term, thinks like positive self talk or self affirmations could be helpful, as could deep breathing to regulate some of your anxiety. Try to stay in the moment with your patients, listen to them and ask questions rather than to your own thoughts of self doubt.

Nothankyouv · 20/03/2022 23:00

Get your GP to prescribe propranolol. I take it before situations I am nervous about and it is incredible!

Nightdancer · 20/03/2022 23:02

You most certainly can do your degree and you'll probably pass it with a first. Podiatry? Look, I studied physiotherapy and my practical exams were my nightmare. I could answer any clinical questions written, but when it came to a tutor standing there with one of my students as a model, I went to pieces. Whilst I was out on clinical placement, I had great mentors and I'm a people person and so it was fine. Got to practical exams - failed loads and had to resit.

What is scaring you? You know your subject and you know you can do it. Is it the fact that it is a real person in front of you? If so, just ask yourself why you chose the degree. No doubt it is because you are extremely intelligent, but I bet there was also an element of you wanting to help others, because you care for others, and can therefore be yourself in front of others. They will have also agreed to have been seen by a student. It won't be a surprise to them.

So, take a deep breath, you know your stuff. Go in with your scalpel, or whatever tools you use in your subject, and be confident. They are in your hands .

Also, if you are really struggling, please do get support from a mentor or lecturer.

Holskey · 20/03/2022 23:03

Sounds like it's just nerves. Understandable that it's making you feel shit and undermining your confidence but you have to get it into perspective. You'll get used to it with practice and you'll improve. Don't make more of it than it is - that wont help. You just have to get through this embarrassing, awkward bit, but you can do it 🙂

littledrummergirl · 20/03/2022 23:03

In one of my first retail jobs I was so anxious on a number of occasions that when I went out to the back to check on stock levels I would duck into the toilet and vomit before returning to the customer as if nothing had happened.

Some things that I find help:
Smile, be conscious of your body language and keep it open and relaxed. Make eye contact.
Slow your speech so that you don't sound rushed.
Write down some generic questions that you can ask to break the ice, open questions work best.
Write down a greeting and read it before you call them in and again while you are waiting.
Practice, role play.
Own your space. They are coming to you for a reason, they will be as nervous as you if not more so.

My current job involves making phone calls. I have my opening and closing statements including my name written down as its very easy to become flustered and miss something.
You can do this.

7eleven · 20/03/2022 23:07

Just to give you a chuckle, to lighten your mood - when I opened the post I thought you were saying you had started to ‘see’ people and it was some sort of ‘sixth sense’, blimmin spooky thread! You’ll be great once you got a few cases under your belt.

alwaysachore · 20/03/2022 23:07

@Aortagggghhhh haven't had a chance to read through the other posters but just wanted to say that this will get easier - as a student nurse I was awful at speaking to patients, particularly in front of mentor/others, as would be very anxious about getting it wrong. It hasn't held me back (now clinical lead) and you gain confidence along the way! The imposter syndrome is here to stay though! It sounds like you are very capable

Rachaelrachael · 20/03/2022 23:08

Sounds like a panic attack. I have been through exactly the same in business meetings, 1st time it happened out of the blue and I then developed a fear of it happening again, which triggered more panic attacks. My Dr prescribed propranolol and it is a wonder drug! Completely took away all the physical symptoms and I was able to think clearly and just be myself

rhizobium · 20/03/2022 23:12

@Aortagggghhhh

Posting as I’m sitting here terrified and would really appreciate if anyone has been in a similar situation. I’m a student and we have practicals, skill based-labs with real people and placements.

We have recently started seeing real people and I’m not doing well at all. I have been getting close to 100% in my exams and if anyone asked me any clinical based questions I would be able to answer them correctly, but when it comes to actually being with a patient I just fall to pieces and can’t do it. I’m absolutely rubbish at it and it’s so humiliating and I feel completely utterly useless.

I start off ok but then the panic starts and I feel my chest go in knots and I get a lump in my throat and cant talk. My mind goes blank and I feel myself sweating and panicking, then the tears start. Im so useless at my own degree and I just can’t do it. I can make small talk usually and my parents have always said I can talk the hind legs off a donkey but I just can’t do it when it’s in this setting😢

I’m being supervised at all times by my mentor/supervisor who would step in if I made any clinical mistakes so I’m not worried about getting it wrong, and I’m not expected to diagnose or treat or do anything at this stage, it’s just purely to get us familiar with seeing and interacting with patients. But I can’t even do that right. We carry out some basic tests but everything is checked by our mentor.

Im terrified of doing this class again. How do I toughen up and get better at this?😢💔

Each time you do it will get easier @Aortagggghhhh

I used to be exactly the same, to the point where I wouldn't be able to do any work or focus on anything in the lead up. But gradually gradually it becomes routine and you'll wonder why you were so intimidated by it in the first place.

It sounds like you're doing brilliantly academically, the bedside skills will follow If you've got a good relationship with your mentor I'd have a chat to them about it.

And this is exactly why you doing labs & practicals as a student - you need experience and everyone will make mistakes! As you've said there's no way a mistake can harm a patient as everything is being check, so the absolute worst scenario is a bit of social awkwardness (which will be much worse in your head and likely the patient doesn't even notice).

Chewedcarpet · 20/03/2022 23:13

Hi @Aortagggghhhh. I'm an academic skills lecturer. I'm a very nervous speaker as well so I get it (and hence my interest!). You are welcome to PM me for some advice if you like as I'm always keen to learn more about different kinds of learning format.

Whatever you do, try to identify what you need to do in the interaction in quite a detailed way, such as show empathy, ask the right questions, present information in a clear way to the lay person. What are the stages in these interactions eg small talk first, and what things can you prepare to say in advance eg quick chat about the weather? Does your department have an assessment rubric that tells you what you get your grades for and what is expected of you? Are there videos on Youtube of someone doing a similar type of interaction that you can learn to "act" it from? How about a classmate role-playing it with you?

Once you have some targets, evaluate how good you are at each thing. You will probably say you're crap at them all, so identify the better and less good things. Now the latter are your focus for each interaction - take a targeted approach rather than trying to get it all right in just a couple of weeks. Reflect on just one aspect after each interaction - what went OK, what didn't, and how you can improve for next time.

Do any of the lecturers have office hours for you to seek some more personalised advice?

godmum56 · 20/03/2022 23:15

oh my goodness OP, many if not all of us have been there. In some respects all of us clinicians are putting on an act and you have to learn to do it well. First thing is to speak to your mentor about it and be completely honest. Sometimes meds are needed/helpful, sometimes not. It happens and it happens often and its not the end of the world.