Does anybody else ever feel guilty for posting on here

[Sugarisaddictive111]

I tended to post about my partner in the past if we had an issue etc (I'd also talk the issue through with him too) but i never spoke about it to family or friends really, for some reason I didn't think it was fair to discuss him like that with family and friends and I still prefer not to.

I no longer do that on here (still post about other things) but for some reason I feel awful about doing so. I've either had most deleted or moved to 30 days only and so on.

I did tell my partner that I tended to consult online rather than speak to friends etc. And he said he would speak to me and then friends and such.

Does anybody else feel like this, I just feel horrible for some reason

My exh has never forgotten or forgiven my discussions about our relationship on here (he snooped and found them). But my argument was exactly the same as yours OP - would he rather I sought advice from people who know him in RL? Also MN is totally anonymous so nobody could know who we were. This was 8 years ago and he still mentions it sometimes. It hurt him deeply but I think that was just because he saw my raw, unfiltered thoughts, not wrapped in cotton wool to appease him. He says I wrote about him on the internet but that makes it sound like I publicly humiliated him. It wasn’t like that. You can’t publicly humiliate someone who is anonymous.

The overwhelming advice I received from MN at the time was LTB.

Reader, I LTB.

On the one hand, it is a one sided portrayal, so rather unfair. If one gets advice from friends, they have more contexts, they can say 'but he does your manicure and pedicure without fail on Fridays, and he just bought you that thing, it's a bit unfair to say he is stingy and inattentive.'

BUT

Friends aren't there when you make up. They don't get the flowers, or that thing he does with his tongue...So all they are left with is a bad impression.

So overall, better to sound things out online, get some perspectives you may not have thought of. Of course friends are better for important support, but running to them for every little thing is destructive.

I feel guilt today for something I posted yesterday. Can't take it back but wrote something too abrupt (sometimes my filter fails!).
I'll probably be thinking about it for years now.

I’ve started a post a couple of times and then thought better of it in case I was recognised. I don’t know if there’s an element of ‘I’d feel guilty if someone involved saw it’ in that.

An awful lot of people seem to get an attack of the guilts when a vote doesn’t go in their favour…

I also LTB after posting on here - the advice and opinions were very useful and not one sided like friends would have been. I also navigated to a much better place with narcissistic family members and came out of the FOG.

It's helped me loads

So no, I don't feel guilty

If you are posting on here about your relationship 9/10 that relationship is not worth saving sadly. If gets to the point where you need advice but would be embarrassed to tell your friends and family why, you need to think about that. And its not about you needing advice.