To ask my kids nicely to do something & expect it done?!

[vinoinveritas]

I always ask my children nicely to do something eg please can you lay table, please can you throw ball for dog in garden, please can you pick your dirty clothes up off the floor & put them in laundry basket etc.

They literally NEVER do it on the first request. I ask again, then normally on 3rd or 4th ask, I am either shouting or threatening with a sanction: if you don’t do it now, I will turn the wifi off/no chocolate later/take your phone etc
I find it incredibly draining that they never just ‘do’ something without complaining/refusing etc. How do other people get their children to co-operate without a drama?! DS (13) is the worst but DD (10) is pretty bad too. Both seem naturally very lazy. Help!

You could warn them in advance that you wont be asking multiple times anymore, you will ask once and give them a timeframe, then if its not done, there will be punishments. They are old enough to be forewarned about it and comprehend what you are saying, and im sure itll take a couple of times of following through with the threat and they will quickly catch on.

Just now they know they dont habe to do it until the 3/4th time asked, so you need to bring the consequences earlier if you want them to react earlier

sorry Op, no answers here just a similar sufferer here. Single parent so everything falls to me and its utterly relentless.

I did 'ask once, tell once, and then 'do' - as in I'd go stand over them until it was done, and that would invoke a consequence.

I hear you sister - only here in the hope of picking up some tips

Honestly I think most kids of that age are like this a lot of the time. Sorry OP!