Staying off work sick.

[Somerset1972]

I’ve been off work sick for the last 2.5 weeks.
I’ve had a really difficult time recently, my mum has Alzheimer’s and I’m solely responsible for her, she started on some new medication that resulted in delusions and hallucinations, I don’t have any care input.
I also have 2 children with autism and type1 diabetes.
I usually manage things ok when I’m feeling well myself, but recently things have been really bad and I’ve ended up having a total breakdown of my mental and physical health.
I get really bad migraines and cluster headaches and the last year they’ve been completely out of control, the last month they’ve ruined my life! I’ve just started on some new preventative drugs that haven’t really kicked in yet. I’ve tried everything the last year to no avail.
Due to the whole situation and the pain I was in with having cluster after cluster one day I ended up taking an overdose. I didn’t really realise what I was doing at the time, it was out of desperation because of the pain I was in.
I’ve now seen my neurologist and he has booked me in to have nerve blocks injected into my head and neck in 2 weeks time.
I’ve also seen a new dentist as I’ve been getting a lot of pain in my jaw and face that seemed to be triggering migraines. After a few X-rays she found that I had a cracked wisdom tooth with some twisted roots. We agreed to have it removed as she thought it could well be contributing to some of the nerve pain in my face and head.

The tooth removal and the nerve block injections are within a few days of each other and my sick note runs out the day after my tooth removal so I’d be due back in work the day after.
I’ve never had nerve blocks before and don’t know anyone who has, so I really don’t know what to expect.
I’ve also never had a tooth taken out or even a filling! So I don’t know how that’s going to go either.
I’ve been told by another member of staff that I’m unreasonable expecting another week off.
I had a day off in January because of migraine. My employer is aware that it is a long term condition that I have and I disclosed it to them before starting my job. If either of the procedures go wrong and I need to go off sick again then it will be classed as another period of sickness. Meaning I’ll be put into the last tier of the absence management policy.
Am I being unreasonable in thinking it would be a better and more sensible idea to not go back to work until I’ve had both done?

I'm so sorry for all that you've been through and continue to face. Absolutely take some more time. I had my wisdom teeth removed (by general anesthestic) and needed a week off after as it wasn't healing very quick and I was still on liquid. With everything going on for you some more time off absolutely seems like the right move and I'm sure that your GP will also agree. It's not ideal for your employer but I've always maintained that after a period of illness (I have a neurological condition too) that I go back where I'm reasonably sure I can stay in work. Yes long absences are problematic but being in and out is more difficult for people to manage. Is there any support available for your mum?

I had 2 wisdom teeth removed in January (2 separate appointments) and went straight back to work after both.

It's different for everyone so I don't think anyone can predict how you'll feel.

If you need the time off though, take it. No one else knows how you are feeling!

I had a wisdom tooth while pregnant so the pain relief I could have was paracetamol. I booked it for a Saturday morning a while it was an uncomfortable weekend, I just chilled at home I was fine to work again on the Monday. So I wouldn’t worry about the tooth.

The other member of staff needs to wind their neck in.

Your mental health alone is enough reason to extend your sick note and a dr would have no problem extending it.

As someone who also suffers cluster headaches, Atypical facial pain, a host of other health issues & has a parent with dementia I’m sending you a (((((hug)))))

I hope the injection and the extraction go smoothly and you feel, at least, physically better soon

You will need a week off after the surgery it is extremely painful, but sounds completely necessary and could resolve all your migraine issues.

If it reassures you then I’ve had nerve block and Botox injections for migraines in my lunch break before (I was a student nurse and just went down to the clinic for my appointment). I found them totally fine (they sting a bit but don’t really hurt and I had no side effects at all afterwards).
I think if you haven’t had them before then I’d probably try to schedule the appointment for a Friday afternoon so you can see how you get on over the weekend.
(Also, if they aren’t effective then I had CGRP injections for migraines and they’re completely life changing).

I’ve also had a wisdom tooth removed with local anaesthetic and gone straight to work afterwards (although it was a fairly relaxed admin job and I’d taken some co-codamol). I think if I’d had a more difficult extraction that required root work or sedation then I’d have taken a couple of days off work (the day of the procedure and the next day, or tried to schedule for a Friday afternoon).

Ignore your co-worker, it has nothing to do with them. I think if your sick note runs out the day after the nerve block injections then I’d suggest speaking to your GP and asking them to extend your sick note until after you’ve had both procedures (it sounds like they’d only be extending for a couple of extra days anyway).
Your mental health in itself sounds like enough to extend your absence (especially if you’re feeling stressed about the procedures and going straight back to work/the sickness procedure if you can’t go straight back).

Hi, no currently no help available for my mum, although she’s had a more stable week.
If I was sat in an office I’d feel more comfortable in going back, but I have a very physical job. My GP has just this minute refused my repeat for my abortive drug I use as according to them I’ve used too much. So I know I’m going to be stuck in a cycle of migraines and clusters until I see the neurologist in 2 weeks. Occupational health from work called me yesterday and told me I need to recognise the signs one is coming and take the drug immediately, I can’t though can I! She also told me I’ve had cluster headaches long enough to recognise the signs and do what I can to avoid triggers. I get them every spring and every autumn and that is what the trigger is. It’s quite common apparently. Unfortunately I can’t avoid the seasons changing!

So sorry you are in such a difficult situation and yadnbu to extend your leave.

Is the other member of staff your manager or HR?

@Somerset1972

Hi, no currently no help available for my mum, although she’s had a more stable week. If I was sat in an office I’d feel more comfortable in going back, but I have a very physical job. My GP has just this minute refused my repeat for my abortive drug I use as according to them I’ve used too much. So I know I’m going to be stuck in a cycle of migraines and clusters until I see the neurologist in 2 weeks. Occupational health from work called me yesterday and told me I need to recognise the signs one is coming and take the drug immediately, I can’t though can I! She also told me I’ve had cluster headaches long enough to recognise the signs and do what I can to avoid triggers. I get them every spring and every autumn and that is what the trigger is. It’s quite common apparently. Unfortunately I can’t avoid the seasons changing!

I'm not sure if this helps, but as a fellow chronic migraine sufferer.... You can buy Sumatriptan otc. I find Asda the easiest place to get it from, Boots the hardest as you have to fill out a form and for the pharmacist to agree to supply it. I also find taking a dose of ibuprofen or aspirin in water, a triptan and a can of full fat coke works for me really well. Has your neurologist given you guidance on how many painkillers you can take at once? But also have a look at Medication Overuse Headaches, just in case that could be an issue for you.

As for increasing your sick note.... get in touch with your gp now and get it extended, as you need to be prepared I find. If only for your mental health, you need some time away from work.

Yes I’ve had Botox it didn’t hurt at all. I can’t schedule the appointment myself, it’s when the neurologist has it available, it’s a 3 hour round trip too. It’s to have my occipital nerves blocked, is that the crgp you had? I really hope it is life changing, absolutely nothing else has worked and they’ve had me trial everything, even the un licensed stuff.

The occipital nerve block is different to the CRGP injections (they’re fairly new and I think they’ve only recently been approved by NICE, you have to have them every month and they’re pretty expensive so most neurologists will try other things first. I’m also not sure how effective they are for cluster headaches, I had mine for chronic migraines).
I found the nerve block worked reasonably well at reducing the severity of pain with my migraines, and if you’ve had Botox before then you shouldn’t find it much worse (at least I didn’t). Although the CRGP injections were really game changing at reducing the frequency of my migraines and all the other symptoms that go with it.

Good luck! I had chronic migraines for years and literally tried everything, it’s amazing when you find something that works!

Wisdom teeth vary greatly, so please take your dentist's advice not random people on Mumsnet on how that will affect you. (Mine varied from just needing the afternoon off to ten days - the latter was a general anaesthetic job, so yours probably won't be that bad if the dentist can do it.)

@Somerset1972

Off topic I know, but have you had a needs assessment for you mum yet? This is the first thing you need to do, and support should follow from that.
www.nhs.uk/conditions/social-care-and-support-guide/help-from-social-services-and-charities/getting-a-needs-assessment/

Hi, yes, I’ve tried that, she is refusing any care from anyone else agency etc. All her needs are being met by me, so they have decided she requires no input from social care. She’s also self funding. They came out after I’d come out of hospital and I’d told them I could no longer cope. They handed me a care directory and left.