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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parents at soft play

24 replies

twinnie22 · 16/03/2022 08:28

Good morning everyone. Just here for some opinions .. as this kept me up all night

I have twin boys who are 2y 7m.
Took them to soft pay yesterday to let some steam out as they were going insane indoors.

Twin mums will know that sometimes it's hard to keep both in the same place so you end up running up & down trying to be present for both.

As I was helping one of them get out of a little car. The other one was going up the steps to the slide. When this little girl decided to stop & block his way and give him a little push. Which I saw but said nothing as he would normally just ignore and make way to pass. But instead he grabbed her and pulled her down 🙈 and she fell to the bottom of these steps. At which point I ran straight over to tell him off & apologise. But by the time I got there... this girls mum was giving him abuse calling him a "little shit / ffing bully etc " I have to say I was in shock. I don't speak like this towards my twins so how dare she?!
I asked her if she'd noticed that her DD was the first to push and block his way and she said yes but she's a girl .. boys shouldn't pull little girls and I should teach
Ahhhhh she was sooo precious about her DD like how dare my son touch her! Am I wrong to think you shouldn't take your children to soft play if you're that precious about them and also expect the other children to react back if yours is pushing?
I left in tears and shock as no adult has ever spoken to my children in such manner & I can't get over it 😅
Is this normal? Would you shout at the other child? My twins have always pushed / been pushed or hit and I never took it on the other children. Normally I would wait for the parent to sort it or just remove my child.

OP posts:
Baaaa · 16/03/2022 08:31

I'd find another soft play if parents at that one swear at kids. Sounds rough.

SuperSleepyBaby · 16/03/2022 08:32

No - i wouldn’t shout at all - i know what kids are like - i have 4 - it would be water off a ducks back for me!!

Strugglingtodomybest · 16/03/2022 08:33

Wow, if an adult had spoken like that to my kids when they were that age, I would have been furious, and I'm normally very laid back.

I'm not surprised you were upset.

Tiredcatmum · 16/03/2022 08:33

YANBU - I would have reported her for verbally abusing my child.

Original poster
twinnie22 · 16/03/2022 08:34

@Baaaa

I'd find another soft play if parents at that one swear at kids. Sounds rough.
It really isn't 🙈 there's always lovely mums & dads around. I really like it but yes it's not appropriate language around children. That's why I was in shock.
OP posts:
Original poster
twinnie22 · 16/03/2022 08:36

Yes I should've reported her. Instead I left in tears. I'm a little annoyed with myself now

OP posts:
Coronado2 · 16/03/2022 08:36

I would say that's not very nice or we don't push, although I'd have already told my child off for the push straight away. I'd never shout at someone else's child and never even consider wmswearing at them! I'd complain to staff if someone swore at my child.

Baaaa · 16/03/2022 08:37

@twinnie22

Yes I should've reported her. Instead I left in tears. I'm a little annoyed with myself now
Oh no don't be annoyed at yourself. I'd be upset too. It's such a nasty thing to do. And she might have been having a bad day or whatever but you never call a child a little shit. That's vile.
NinaDefoe · 16/03/2022 08:38

You have had the misfortune to cross paths with Idiot Mum OP.

The little girl shouldn’t have blocked & pushed, your little boy shouldn’t have pushed her back. BOTH should be told firmly no pushing and moved away from the slide.

TBH, the ‘never touch a girl’ mantra is massively flawed.
I work with teenagers and have seen girls hitting/kicking lads who aren’t ‘allowed’ to retaliate. One lady ended up with a black eye. Girls can be vicious.
Bottom line is, girls shouldn’t hit, lads shouldn’t hit. Teach all DC THAT.

NinaDefoe · 16/03/2022 08:38

One LAD not lady!

Baaaa · 16/03/2022 08:39

And I agree with previous PP girl or boy there is no acceptable violence.

purpleboy · 16/03/2022 08:39

Don't blame yourself for not saying anything.
I would be gobsmacked if someone started swearing at my child, I have no idea how I would react.
I would possible email in a complaint with a description in case she is a regular, probably wouldn't be going back either. Doesn't sound like a nice place.

MrsSkylerWhite · 16/03/2022 08:42

It was sux of one, half a dozen of the other. Ideally, each mum should have told their child to apologise to each other.

Swearing like that is totally out of order. If it ever happens again, report to management. There’s no place for language like that in a kids’ play area and we’re it my business, they’d be barred.

Theblacksheepandme · 16/03/2022 08:43

People are assholes OP. There isn't too much you can do to change people. I completely understand that your upset but you will get this a lot. Some parents never see what their precious child is doing but jumps straight in if a child retaliates. Her use of bad language was unacceptable and I'd be having a word with the manager. She shouldn't even have approached your child.

takealettermsjones · 16/03/2022 08:43

She sounds bonkers OP. Hope you and your DTs are okay!

Original poster
twinnie22 · 16/03/2022 08:44

@MrsSkylerWhite

It was sux of one, half a dozen of the other. Ideally, each mum should have told their child to apologise to each other.

Swearing like that is totally out of order. If it ever happens again, report to management. There’s no place for language like that in a kids’ play area and we’re it my business, they’d be barred.

That was my intention as I made my way towards "the incident" to tell MY child off and make him apologise and apologise to the parent but by the time I got there. She was already shouting at him. He looked so scared 😭 think we were both a little shocked.
OP posts:
Mumdiva99 · 16/03/2022 08:45

Not OK to swear at kids at all.

I have spoken to other kids that are being mean/rough. But equally in that situation both children needed reminding to take turns and not push.

If anyone is abusive again you now know to report them to the staff.

Danikm151 · 16/03/2022 08:48

How old was her child and wasn’t she properly supervising her?

Some parents at soft play are horrendous. Rise above it and if you spot her in the future then give her a shove 🤣

Looubylou · 16/03/2022 08:50

Please still ring and complain with descriptions. Just incase she kicks off again, either with you or another unfortunate child. I was going to say "unbelievable" but sadly it isn't. I hope your son is OK.

GreenWheat · 16/03/2022 08:51

She was totally out of order to speak to your son like that. She sounds like a sexist areshole who would not have sworn at him had he been female.

WTF475878237NC · 16/03/2022 08:51

I often told others kids off when the parent was MIA. However, I never raised my voice or used bad language and wouldn't have said anything whilst the other parent was clearly coming to address it themselves.

MajorCarolDanvers · 16/03/2022 09:01

Swearing at kids is appalling. I'd have complained to the staff about her behaviour.

CrabLegs · 16/03/2022 09:03

This is one of these situations where I look at my own family and friends and people who are in my life and feel happy.

Just think...she's someone's mate and someone's daughter. Going around causing chaos and drama. At least you only had her for two minutes!

Original poster
twinnie22 · 16/03/2022 10:37

@CrabLegs

This is one of these situations where I look at my own family and friends and people who are in my life and feel happy.

Just think...she's someone's mate and someone's daughter. Going around causing chaos and drama. At least you only had her for two minutes!

😂😂👏👏
OP posts:
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