Aibu? Unreasonable neighbours, had to report

[ChartingBloopers]

AIBU? Just reported my neighbours and feel like a snitch.

So I got new neighbours about 4 months ago. I know of her, I know she likes her parties. My Dh knows a few of the blokes that come round for a drink with her and others. She regularly parties until about 4am on weekends or one or two days through the week. It's very loud, and she sometimes has fires in the garden while drinking, below my kids window. (Terraced house, thin, shitty private house) few times dh has had to ask them to keep noise down with the shouting when putside drinking as it inevitably wakes the kids up. So.. she knows we have young children at school ages. But I can tolerate that. What I can NOT tolerate is this:
Every 2 to 3 nights I can hear her having sex. I know its completely normal and I accept that, but it's fucking loud and not normal. Very loud deep moaning which turns to screaming moaning. You can hear it iver my frigging tv when it's really loud. It's getting to point where she's waking my kids up and they're repeating the noises she's making the next day because... Well, they're kids and have no clue what it means and thinks it's funny.

So I have reported her to the council. I can't take it anymore. I refuse to go round to speak to her about it as I am totally embarrassed and honestly couldn't imagine bringing a conversation up like that to someone I've never spoken to.
It's that bad with the overall noise, the other side of her has even sold her house and is moving else where!! Her parter has be round numerous times asking them to keep the noise down as their young child is unable to sleep most nights, which has lead to violent outbursts. Also another reason for me not wanting to go round. 😭

Aibu in reporting her? I can't take it any longer. I am also looking for elsewhere to live. I feel like I'm watching the time at night ready to turn my TV up for "moaning time" 🤢🤮

Bloody hell, she sounds like a major pain in the arse. Does she work, or is this going on all the time?

Why did you not speak to her about the sex noises yourself? What did you say when you reported it to the council?

Sorry just seen that you’re too embarrassed. She will know it’s you that’s reported which arguably is even worse in terms of neighbour awkwardness.

I appreciate it’s really not on, I have had neighbours like this before

Omg, I think you must have the same neighbour we had a few years ago! Same behaviour, particularly the s.e.x.... deepestvsympargy, you did the right thing!

I also think you have my old neighbour! And I did the exact same thing by contacting the council. I had initially popped a note through the door which helped for all of a couple of weeks. The council took it seriously, thankfully. Not that anything changed, the neighbours ignored the council warnings and then ended up just abandoning the property one night.

Isn't it classed as child abuse to force children to hear people having sex? If you were reported for the same thing you'd be investigated by SS. Definitely NBU.

YANBU. Your DH has spoken to them about noise and they’ve continued, so you are within your rights to complain.

You say you have reported her to the council, what is their response?

As her overall behaviour is antisocial this is a very difficult situation and I hope you manage to move or get help from the council.

Do you rent or own your property?

If you own your property and sell I think you have to legally declare details about neighbours, not far from us was some awkward people and their neighbours got into bother for not declaring the issues.

Hopefully things will be resolved soon.

Well within your rights, that sounds horrendous! I certainly would not want to knock on her door and complain about her screaming orgasms.

Does she rent or own? If she rents get on to the landlord. I had a tenant and within the first weeks the neighbours were complaining about these kind of noises. It was my responsibility to deal with it.

Thank you all for you comments. I appreciate it so much. She rents, I'm going to try gather her landlords details as its just becoming a nightmare. I've to wait 10 days for the council to get back to me. I am definitley expecting some sort of outburts from them when they receive a letter or something..
Luckily I rent, but have will have money to go for a mortgage in the next upcoming months. This has been our home for 7 years, I feel so saddened I'm having to move us all because of her. We didn't want a mortgage just as yet with the current prices. Ugh.
Can not believe how many others have had similar issues 😔

Her landlord won't do anything because there's nothing they can do. They are either on a fixed contract or if on a rolling one, could give notice, but that won't make them leave and could end up in court and costly, and ultimately, your welfare is not their responsibility. Calling the council was the right thing to do.

Ok, I'll leave it with the council for now. Hopefully they resolve it quickly. Thank you.

Change your Wifi name to "Karen I can hear you shagging"

Can you scream and moan back one night to get the message across?😁😅

Why would you ever feel guilty? Someone making that kind of noise knows very well what they're doing. Sex doesn't have to be that loud. She simply doesn't care that she's imposing her irritating noises on everyone in earshot. (Wouldn't be surprised if she gets an extra thrill from the exhibitionist aspect.) I question whether complaining will make a difference, but it's worth a try!

Good luck!

play Bolero each time she (fakes) her orgasm - different guys by any chance maybe she is a working girl? Landlords can't do much - what can they do? evict her? On what grounds & it will cost them meg bucks because she would probably stop paying rent & in even pre-covid days it would take 6/7 months to evict (probably without rent) let alone legal costs
Best route is keeping log & possibly recording the noise & noting if it is many men rather than a partner because if she is "working" that would be a cause for landlord to evict quite quickly as antisocial (criminal?) behaviour & the police might be interested

Years ago, a friend had a similar problem with his upstairs neighbour.

One night, when there were quite a few of us round at his place, we all gave a resounding round of applause when Mrs Upstairs got particularly vocal.

Her sex life got much quieter after that.

Normally I would suggest applause at a certain point or fake noises to put them off. However, given that the other neighbour has talked to them to no avail, I think you did the right thing.

I rang noise control. I very apologetically said I didn't know whether to ring them or the police, as potentially it could be a rape, and said, somewhat hopefully, that I was sure that they got calls like this all the time.

There was a lengthy pause, and then the man on the other end of the line said in a very carefully controlled voice, 'not so much ma'am'.

Anyway, noise control went and had a very noisy word with them and at least the sex noises got quieter. This was in detached houses with a good eight feet between them. . .