To defer child starting P1

[Sandles12]

Have a June born son who is at pre school and due to start school in Sept. However the law has just changed allowing him to defer for a year. At present he would be the youngest in his year.

However the nursery he is in is oversubscribed for next year (unless of course some who have applied defer) so I would have to find him another preschool place for the year.

Anybody else in Northern Ireland in this situation or anyone else have a younger child for their year? At present is can only just about count to five, can just about hold a pencil, can't write or recognise sounds. Interested in your thoughts. I'm leaning towards deferral to try and give him the best start.

None of those things matter if he can do them yet

Can he put on shoes/coat?
Toilet and hand-wash totally independently?
Can he follow simple instructions?
Can he feed himself/open a water bottle?

These are the things that really matter.

As a teacher I tend to focus on social and emotional development rather than anything academical.
How is he with making friends and playing with others?
As the pp said is he able to put his shoes on his feet and zip up his jacket? Can he follow a set of instructions?
Overall you know your child better than anyone else.
It doesn’t matter if he’s the youngest in his year.
Focus on if you think he is ready to move on.
Always easier to defer now rather than struggle at school!

It depends if you think another year would benefit him and whether you think he is ready. I'm in Scotland so don't know if the school years work the same but my oldest was a November birthday so was 4 years and 8 months when she started but I had no worries I knew she was ready and would be fine. My youngest is going to be 5 in May and due to start this August. I was approached by the nursery at then end of last year and advised to try and defer her as she didn't seem anywhere near ready which I agreed with. Because her birthday is May it would be more complicated to defer and she had to be assessed by people from the education board etc. As it happens she has actually improved a lot in the past few months and it's been agreed that there would be no benefit to defer her but I know I made the right decision at the beginning of the year to attempt to defer her because at that point myself and the nursery were concerned. What I'm trying to say is you make the right decision for your child and if your gut tells you deferral then that's what I would go for. I was also told if the deferall was approved I could still change my mind right up until August!

I was also advised it was the emotional side of things they were concerned by and that was the reason we attempted to defer. Shes bright as a button but behind in maturity where as my oldest was the total opposite she was emotionally ready but absolutely not academically.

I’m also in Scotland. Deferral is very common where I live. I have/will defer all the children I can. There are so, so many benefits to deferring. Check out Upstart - Let Them Play for the research.

Back in the 80s, when they let kids join whenever I started p1 after turning 4 in July. My sister was 4 in the august before starting. I was more than capable. Both of us went to grammars. Did maths gcse age 14.

My niece was born on 19th June and is one of the smartest kids in her year (she's 14 now and at a grammar school with v high transfer test result).

The month does not maketh the man.

Unless you genuinely think your child has developmental delays, I wouldn't even think about it. I actually put my son into nursery a year early (July birthday). He was the only child who could use scissors in his nursery class and was made Joseph in his class nativity play. If they had allowed him into p1 at 4 I would have jumped at the chance. If anything, I think being older in his year has made him lazy.

@PivotPivotPivottt hi and thanks. School years work differently here. He would only be 4 years and 3 months. So if you are 4 before 1at July you start in Sept, but if you are five between 2ND July and end August you also start Sept. So the oldest in any P1 class is 5 and 2 months, and the youngest 4 and 2 months.

I kind of feel that an extra year of pre school play can only be beneficial. I still feel he is a toddler and is prone to the odd tantrum, very immature behaviour etc. I have been dreading the homework etc and imagining fighting with him to get it done. My concern is getting him into pre school for another year and the logistics of childcare etc.

@Hiddenvoice able to do his shoes when he chooses but gets frustrated. I still dress him. Can't zip jacket but getting there. Yes was thinking school could be a struggle in terms of structured work. He is sociable and loves imaginary play etc...part of me wants to give him another year of this gun in pre school without the 'pressure'. Logically he has to be more ready for formal learning a year older. NI has the youngest school starting age in Europe so he would still be starting younger than children in a lot of other countries.

I can see that in the end most people achieve what they are capable of, it doesn't mean some didn't struggle in the early days. A lot to think about...

My child will literally only be 4 in august but starting school first week September (England) so others will be a whole year older than her. Following this thread with interest! I am v worried as it seems so young but she can put shoes coat etc on and is v bright; would love to let her play more in an unstructured manner but she’s desperate to go to school so I’m going to let her and see. She’s done with nursery, can’t imagine another year of it; I think they say worst case scenario she can repeat reception year at her school and then be one of oldest in Y1.

I’m from NI but living in England. Deferred for my son. He’s doing brilliantly. No regrets (particularly after lockdowns and school closures). There is another thread on here about this from earlier today/ yesterday. For me, deferring had many benefits that were too important to ignore.

I would defer - I deliberately had two autumn children to make sure they’re the oldest. Can make a big difference

My son is August born and ‘should’ have started school last August but we deferred him and he will be starting this year too.

It’s a big decision to make and me and my husband spent months deliberating over it not ultimately, after doing research and speaking to teachers we came to the conclusion that deferring him was the best option.

I would defer - I deliberately had two autumn children to make sure they’re the oldest. Can make a big difference

My friend did the same. My friend has 4 sons and they were all born between October and December.

I know it’s not as easy as ‘planning an autumn’ baby for many couples, but it’s very common for people to try and do this.

We deferred our son and we have no regrets. He is currently in P1 and is the 2nd oldest in his class, had he started last year he would have been the youngest. He is doing really well at school, he's one of a small group who could take on slightly harder work if others in the class weren't holding them back.

We couldn't get a nursery place for him for last year though, all the nurseries were over subscribed and as I'm a SAHM I just had him at home with me.

The only downside was that his friends from nursery are now all in P2 but he's made plenty of new friends in his current class.

Hi, just wondering if you made a decision on whether to defer? I’m in the same boat with a June baby so am really interested in this too!

If you have any doubts about your child starting school i would advise defering.
Mine were born late August several weeks premature, i went against my gut instinct when they started as the nursery said they were more than ready. They are in ks2 now and meeting expectations the school are not interested when i tell them about the meltdowns when they get home, the friendship difficulties and emotional problems my gut instinct is still that they should be in the year below but its to late now. i feel guilty all the time.

Hi yes I did defer and he's attending another pre school. Just thought it can't do any harm, only good.

When people say about being ready to start school and all that jazz and how if they can go to the loo or put on their shoes they'll be fine. Well that’s probably true but really the benefit to deferring comes years down the line. Once they’re at high school and taking exams and making big decisions being that year older is a huge help. That little bit more maturity.