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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

sending a nearly seven year old alone on a plane to Germany...

423 replies

emkana · 05/01/2008 16:51

... for a holiday with her grandmother, for five nights?

Dd1 keen to go and not scared. Have never done this before, but as I understand it airline will look after child?

MIL so upset at the thought that she can't even talk about it.

Have to go now, but will check back later.

OP posts:
gibberish · 05/01/2008 19:21

We have sent our two on flights on thier own - dd1 was 9 and dd2 10. They were very much looked after, infact were spoilt rotten (VIP treatment in the executive lounge) and dd1 was even allowed into the cockpit. They absolutely LOVED it and I would have no hesitation sending my younger two, even at 7, if we needed to do it again.

Waswondering · 05/01/2008 19:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wb · 05/01/2008 19:21

If you think your daughter will be OK then go for it. I can't see a problem, esp on such a short flight.

ScaryHairy · 05/01/2008 19:28

I used to do it (but longhaul) all the time as parents were overseas and I went to school in the UK.
It will be an adventure for your child and it is perfectly safe. As Megglevache says, unaccompanied minors get spoilt rotten. Seriously - I had upgrades galore and usually left the plane with a haul of freebies. Those were the days...

As a parent whose child has grandparents in Germany, I can honestly say I would let my DD do this when she gets to this age.

ivykaty44 · 05/01/2008 19:28

I think this type of adventure builds up the confidence of the child and they begin to realsie that they are trusted to be a big grown up child and go of to grandmas on a plane without mum and dad - wow. To give confidence to a child is worth its weight in gold.

I would see it as a positive and go for it.

Reallytired · 05/01/2008 19:40

I think children should build their confidence by walking to school on their own before flying on their own.

Tamum · 05/01/2008 19:41

I'm really surprised at the strength of negative feelings on here- there's no way I'd force a sobbing 6 year old to fly on their own, but if emkana's dd is (as she says) keen to go then why not? It's not like getting a train on your own, is it- she'll be accompanied and looked after all the way. Go for it

hatwoman · 05/01/2008 19:42

dd would, without a doubt be better behaved on a plane if neither me nor dh were there.

ivykaty44 · 05/01/2008 19:53

Reallytired - with the way people in this country drive? Planes much safer to start with

FourPlusOne · 05/01/2008 19:53

If she is happy to do it then I think it should be fine. I am quite over protective of mine, but I don't see anything wrong with it. Sounds like they are very well looked after and it's a short flight. Have never heard anything on the news of something going wrong with this type of scheme. Children are put into others care in school before this age, sounds like they are well supervised.

ScaryHairy · 05/01/2008 19:58

Reallytired- there isn't really a comparison to be made between a child who walks to school alone and one who flies as an unaccompanied minor. Emkana's daughter will not be alone; she will simply be being (well) looked after by people other than her parents.

yogabird · 05/01/2008 19:58

my dd would hate it but my nephew 7 on the 9th \Jan woudl absolutely love it and relish the socialising and attention that he would get. We and our children are all different and we should treat them as such and allow them to develop at a rate suitable for them, IMHO

tortoiseSHELL · 05/01/2008 20:01

If she's happy then yes. My kids just wouldn't do it, but you know your dd, and reading that link, it's fine. They are supervised, looked after etc.

It's only a short flight, no different to using the creche at IKEA I would say, in fact much better supervision!

Those people who say no, would you use a holiday club at school or in a resort? Or a creche at a shopping centre etc?

Dh took a train journey when he was 6 - London to Felixstowe - he had to change trains at Ipswich I think it was, and he managed fine, unaccompanied - his dad dropped him off at London, his grandparents met him. That's far more risky (and no way would I do it with our kids) - but he was fine.

MinkVelvet · 05/01/2008 20:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

malfoy · 05/01/2008 20:12

You are NOT being unreasonable. I did Paris-Manchester from age 7 & loved it.

Unaccompanied (sp?) minors get looked after very well.

BroccoliSpears · 05/01/2008 20:13

LMAO @ Cod. You're typing what I'm thiking - it's almost spooky.

DO IT!!! She'll love it. I skittered all over the world unaccompanied and can't tell you a single bad story.

She'll hardly be left alone for a second anyway.

To be honest I'm a bit stunned that so many people have said no. Not been this shocked by my out-of-touchness with modern parenting since I learned that some people don't put up Christmas trees in case their toddlers mess about with the decorations.

Unfitmother · 05/01/2008 20:14

It's up to you and your DD, I wouldn't as my 7 yr old DD won't let her out her sight but only you know your DD.

hercules1 · 05/01/2008 20:16

I bet my 4 year old would jump at the chance if she had it to do it. Really, realistically what could happen that would be so dreadful.

Original poster
emkana · 05/01/2008 20:58

I must say I am really stunned that so many on here are adamant they wouln't do it. I really do worry quite easily but really what's the worst that could happen? Like somebody said, an airline like Lufthansa would hardly want to get into the headlines "Lufthansa loses child" would it? Of course it makes a big difference what kind of child you have, and dd1 is very very sensible, and does not get bored easily. She will be perfectly able to keep herself entertained for the time of the flight.

frogs, I will phone Lufthansa to confirm, but it does say on their website that you take children to the gate.

OP posts:
Original poster
emkana · 05/01/2008 21:02

Oh and also what gives me reasonable confidence is that dd1 is not a child who gets poorly quickly. In fact the only time I was ever called to playgroup/school to get home was the one time I couldn't go - when I saw Dr. Chitty in London for that scan when pregnant with ds...

OP posts:
darlink · 05/01/2008 21:09

A friend of mine regularly sends her 6 year old daughter on long haul flights , business class no less!
The little girl loves it

DaisyMoo · 05/01/2008 21:11

I reckon there's more chance of them getting lost in a supermarket!

I'd do it happily, my 7yo would adore it and be so proud of himself. But then I've been waving him off on a school bus since he was 4 when loads of other pansies parents are still driving their children in 3 1/2 years later!

frogs · 05/01/2008 21:12

Ok emkana, dd1 went BA, so just going on our experiences.

Original poster
emkana · 05/01/2008 21:14

I really think there's a cultural element to this. As berolina hinted in her post, Germans are quite mad sometimes in their strive for their children's independence, and certainly overdo it at times IMHO, but I am 99 % certain that the response to my question on a German forum would be overwhelmingly in favour.

This does not mean to say, though, that I haven't appreciated all viewpoints - it's made me realize that I really have to discuss all possible scenarios with dd1 in detail, so that she is prepared. So thank you to all of you.

OP posts:
sazzybeehomeforxmas · 05/01/2008 21:15

Blimey - you people who never let your children out of your sight - how on earth do you imagine they're going to learn about how to manage risk? Tsk

If she is keen on the idea emkana then yes, definitely. She will have a guardian with her the whole time so she won't be left alone