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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To make a complaint about a GP?

81 replies

BowsandBaking · 15/03/2022 15:06

I called the surgery to request a routine appointment for my 3yo who has been having increasing joint pain and headaches for the past month and a half.
I explained he has been struggling to climb the stairs over the past week and recently fell down from half up when his legs gave way. The receptionist and she told me to call back at 2pm for a same-day appointment. She said “I’m not medically trained but I feel this should be dealt with today”.

I called back at 2pm where a very harsh, second receptionist told me calls after 2pm are for medical emergencies. I told her that her colleague told me to request a same-day appointment. She reluctantly issued one.

The GP was fuming from the start. Sarcastically reminding me around four times during the call that the afternoon service is for emergencies only. I explained that I tried for a routine appointment but she’d made up her mind by then - she clearly felt I was an over-anxious first time mum. She suggested maybe I had traumatic birth.

She wouldn’t let me go into any detail. I tried to explain that he started new medication around the onset of symptoms and she cut me off. I tried to explain he cannot use his language to fully explain his symptoms as he has additional needs. She was questioning what I define as “additional needs”. I tried to explain that he’s under multiple of consultants for various complex medical needs and is awaiting an MDA for the additional needs.

She kept sighing. She ended up giving him an appointment to be seen tomorrow in such a way that it was very clear it was extremely unnecessary in her eyes. I felt so belittled.

The most important thing is that DS will be seen tomorrow, but AIBU to complain to the practice manager? I think this kind of belittling could prevent somebody seeking medical advice.

OP posts:
BattenbergdowntheHatches · 15/03/2022 15:11

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

Sirzy · 15/03/2022 15:12

If he has just started a new medication then to be honest my first point of call would be the person who prescribed that.

I’m not saying she wasn’t rude but given the complexity of the situation I’m not sure it’s a GP issue

TatianaBis · 15/03/2022 15:15

If you think it's medication linked then you need to go back to the prescriber.

Also a consultant who's up to speed on all his medical needs would probably be better value than a GP.

Original poster
BowsandBaking · 15/03/2022 15:22

He isn’t due to see the prescribing consultant for another month and seeing as he was in a lot of pain yesterday - and unable to walk downstairs this morning, I felt he needed to be reviewed sooner. Even if only for advice as to which of his consultants to contact. He’s on a lot of medication and it could be a coincidence that he started taking a new one but thought it was important to mention it.

OP posts:
RobertSmithsLipstick · 15/03/2022 15:27

I have a sighing gp, too.
Sighing, tutting, eye rolling.
It's just horrible, and it means you end up not saying what you need to.

lemonnandliime · 15/03/2022 15:29

Sounds like an absolute witch.
Absolutely complain.

bigbluebus · 15/03/2022 15:30

Sounds to me like your child's condition is beyond the remit of the GP anyway if he is already under the Consultant with medication prescribed by them. Your better route would surely be to ring the Consultant's secretary to ask for an urgent call or for a message to be passed on to see what you should do.

RobertSmithsLipstick · 15/03/2022 15:35

I would have thought the gp should check the child out physically.
It's not necessarily anything to do with medication.
Then, if the gp determines that perhaps it could be a possible meds issue, then she can refer back to the prescriber.

AnneElliott · 15/03/2022 15:37

Definitely complain - no excuse for a GP to behave like that. Far too many of them do.

TatianaBis · 15/03/2022 15:42

@BowsandBaking

He isn’t due to see the prescribing consultant for another month and seeing as he was in a lot of pain yesterday - and unable to walk downstairs this morning, I felt he needed to be reviewed sooner. Even if only for advice as to which of his consultants to contact. He’s on a lot of medication and it could be a coincidence that he started taking a new one but thought it was important to mention it.
That doesn't matter - you need to call him immediately if you think this may be a consequence of medication.
ChairOfInvisibleStudies · 15/03/2022 15:44

@bigbluebus

Sounds to me like your child's condition is beyond the remit of the GP anyway if he is already under the Consultant with medication prescribed by them. Your better route would surely be to ring the Consultant's secretary to ask for an urgent call or for a message to be passed on to see what you should do.
That may well be the case, but why couldn't the GP have politely explained and suggested that? Not everyone is clued up as to how these things work, but they should still receive appropriate care and guidance.
Nelliephant1 · 15/03/2022 15:46

No need to complain, why on earth would you create more work and unnecessary hassle for a hugely overstretched service just because someone was a bit grumpy?! People have off days, you've got no idea what she was dealing with before your phone or what was heading her way after you finished call so chalk it up to experience and remember that you wanted an appointment and that's what you got. I'm sure you have days too when you're not a sparkling ray of sunshine.

Original poster
BowsandBaking · 15/03/2022 15:46

I agree - I think the GP should be willing to check him over in case it’s not that particular medication causing issues. That consultant would more than likely ask me to get the GP to do the initial check before he saw him in clinic anyways to rule out any other underlying issues as joints are not his speciality. The NHS website advises me to go to the GP for this issue

OP posts:
umberellaonesie · 15/03/2022 15:46

Over the last 20 years I have found GPs to be useless when it comes to my son with complex needs.
I have become the expert in is his diagnosis and I am on first name terms with all his consultants secretarys.
You need to contact his paediatrician and highlight the new symptoms and the association with the new medication.
The GP is not the place for this.

LittleMG · 15/03/2022 15:50

@Nelliephant1

No need to complain, why on earth would you create more work and unnecessary hassle for a hugely overstretched service just because someone was a bit grumpy?! People have off days, you've got no idea what she was dealing with before your phone or what was heading her way after you finished call so chalk it up to experience and remember that you wanted an appointment and that's what you got. I'm sure you have days too when you're not a sparkling ray of sunshine.
If I spoke to someone like this in my workplace I would definitely expect comeback.
Ilovethecinema · 15/03/2022 15:54

I had mine tell me today too keep my shitting arsing appointments. The orange tide cancelled them, not me. You totally have my sympathy op

Original poster
BowsandBaking · 15/03/2022 15:56

I didn’t expect a jolly call with the GP on the phone. I just hoped for some advice and for somebody to check LO out as his symptoms are worsening. Yes, I’ve now got the appointment for that, but I didn’t need to be belittled and made to feel ridiculous for requesting it

OP posts:
HereComesTheSum · 15/03/2022 16:00

@Ilovethecinema

I had mine tell me today too keep my shitting arsing appointments. The orange tide cancelled them, not me. You totally have my sympathy op
None of this post makes any sense to me, are you outside the UK? Genuine question.
Original poster
BowsandBaking · 15/03/2022 16:01

@Nelliephant1

No need to complain, why on earth would you create more work and unnecessary hassle for a hugely overstretched service just because someone was a bit grumpy?! People have off days, you've got no idea what she was dealing with before your phone or what was heading her way after you finished call so chalk it up to experience and remember that you wanted an appointment and that's what you got. I'm sure you have days too when you're not a sparkling ray of sunshine.
She wasn’t just a bit grumpy. No need to minimise. She was rude and dismissive. Why are we making excuses for GPs, who have a duty of care?
OP posts:
HereComesTheSum · 15/03/2022 16:03

@Nelliephant1

No need to complain, why on earth would you create more work and unnecessary hassle for a hugely overstretched service just because someone was a bit grumpy?! People have off days, you've got no idea what she was dealing with before your phone or what was heading her way after you finished call so chalk it up to experience and remember that you wanted an appointment and that's what you got. I'm sure you have days too when you're not a sparkling ray of sunshine.
Wtf?? I bet you're a gp!! They are literally paid to care - to actually give a shit about people. I have previously worked in a bank and had to plaster a smile on my face after every customer and treat the next one as a new person, be polite and listen and carry out their transaction - at times I was massively overstretched, dealing with a lot of money yet I still managed to do this for 5+ years without sighing, belittling and treating people like shit AND I earned just over minimum wage too. So fuck yes a GP should be able to do the same no matter how overstretched they are. And YES she should complain.
starfishmummy · 15/03/2022 16:06

@BowsandBaking

I agree - I think the GP should be willing to check him over in case it’s not that particular medication causing issues. That consultant would more than likely ask me to get the GP to do the initial check before he saw him in clinic anyways to rule out any other underlying issues as joints are not his speciality. The NHS website advises me to go to the GP for this issue
I have a medically complex child (now adult).

Do you have open access to children's assessment unit, a ward or paeds a&e? Or a community nurse who can intervene and get him seen?

(Our community nurse was worth her weight in gold for doing just that!!)

Hankunamatata · 15/03/2022 16:06

You need to go back to prescribing consultant. GP wont be able to deal with this. Phone consultants secretary and get an urgent consultation.

Original poster
BowsandBaking · 15/03/2022 16:16

Thanks for the suggestions to go directly to the consultant’s secretary - if he ever has a clear, definite side effect of a medication then this is the route I’ll take going forward. As the symptoms could be a result of a number of medications, I will continue with the plan to have him checked over by a GP first in this instance. He hasn’t been given open access to CAU or the children’s ward and doesn’t have a community nurse. As some of his conditions are worsening, this has been discussed. He has an MDA coming up so hopefully we will have a plan in place soon.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 15/03/2022 16:23

Realistically what are you expecting the Gp to do? Not being arsey but just aware how little knowledge GPs often have when it comes to medically complex people (no dig at GPs they are after all general practitioners)

My first point of call would be the consultant who prescribed the new medication given the close link between timings. Otherwise if it’s a significant change in presentation I would either contact the consultant most likely to be able to help or go to a and e where they can access more tests and specialists if needed.

MissyB1 · 15/03/2022 16:28

It’s not for the Op to have to diagnose the problem then chase down a consultant. We are not in America where people have a paediatrician for their kids. In Uk we have to go through the GP as the first port of call. The OP doesn’t know if this is anything to do with medication.
It was perfectly acceptable to make an appointment with the Gp, and it was the receptionist who decided it was urgent! If the GP thought a phone call to the Consultant’s secretary was needed they could have said so.

We have a system that right now is more difficult than ever to navigate. All staff and all departments are under pressure. That is not OP’s fault.