To be pissed off at ex for this?

[coolyeraeroplane]

Ex has daughter (8) every second weekend and one night during the week every second week.

This weekend is his weekend with daughter but last night he was working late and asked me to pick her up from school and keep her till 8 pm which I did. Sunday I am picking her up as she is coming to a family event with me. So really today was my only day child free in two weeks.

I worked in the morning so when I got in around 1pm I had some lunch and then decided to go to my bed and put a film on and doze. Which I did and it was lovely UNTIL there was almighty hammering at the door which woke me up. At first I thought it was in my dream so ignored. But it continued so down I went.

It's ex at the door with daughter, I've to make her lunch as they were at the park round the corner from my house and she's hungry! I said I have no ham or sandwich stuff in (which I don't), take her to the shop to get her a sausage roll or something and you've just woken me up. He said, 'it's three in the afternoon'.

I'm now awake with a banging headache in a bad mood feeling bad for turning my daughter away. I can't imagine ever just turning up to his door demanding her feed our daughter. I'm like Christ can I not have one full day to myself??

He’s a twat. Next tome don’t answer the door or phone. Train him out of it.

YANBU no wonder he is an ex he’s being a twat next time I would just ignore him.

You did the right thing.

Glad to hear this, thought I was going to be told I am the worst mum in the world turning my daughter away

Did you only split up recently? My XH used to do weird shit like this in the first few months. It was like he couldn't quite get his head around the fact that I didn't have to accommodate him any more.

You did the right thing.

@cuppycakey

Did you only split up recently? My XH used to do weird shit like this in the first few months. It was like he couldn't quite get his head around the fact that I didn't have to accommodate him any more.

You did the right thing.

Weirdly no, we have been split 5 years now. Very bizarre.

Ring doorbell.

That’s very twattish of him.

It’s something my ex used to do, and still might do occasionally. He’s had a lot of talking to about why not to do it - just randomly turning up at different times of the day/ evening so I could never relax and know I was definitely “off duty”.

The only thing that’s helped is his partner moving in with him unfortunately.

You feel like a dick having to say to the other parent of your child “now remember, don’t come randomly knocking on my door” but I’ve had to say it many many times. Maybe it’s sunk in a bit but probably it’s his partner being there (so a woman to do the woman stuff ) or because ds is 8 now and easier than when he was 5/6 which was the peak of the never leaving me alone.

It's so strange as if I was at a park by him and my daughter was hungry I'd take her to the shop and grab her something to eat ...because she's with me.

You're the default parent even if you're not even there.

5 years and he’s still not learnt how to feed his own child. Well, you know why he’s your ex ……..
YANBU, he’s heard of shops and cafes and could even have taken a carton of drink and a bag of crisps and an apple with him.