Does anyone work as a Domestic or Activities Co-ordinator in a care home and could tell me about it please?

[treesandsnow]

Sorry I realise this is AIBU and that I am posting for traffic, but I really could do with some advice.

I'm 35.

I am in the unenviable position of having almost ZERO previous work experience - worked in retail as a teenager long ago. GCSEs only.
I'll come right out with it and be honest with the reason I have zero work history, because it is relevant I think in how alien I feel towards 'normal' work at my age - I was a sex worker / prostitute or whatever you want to call it - for a decade.

Since I left sex work a while back I need to get a 'normal' job. The problem is I have no idea what to do! Or more what I can do.

After giving it a LOT of thought and research I think decided on either Domestic Staff in a care home setting, or Activities Staff in a care home setting.

If you work in one of these jobs can you please tell me more about the ins and outs, what you do each day?
Is it really physically tasking? (I can't really do much heavy lifting or straining etc, but I can do most things. lugging equipment about worries me a bit)
Is it a really high pressured environment? (I can handle some pressure but could not handle a really high pressure job)
Do you have to be outgoing? (for the activities work), and actually come up with whole new events or do you sort of work within a framework?

I feel a strong pull towards working with elderly people and helping do something worthwhile. I have read all the descriptions online but feel like it would be helpful to hear from people who actually do these jobs.

Thanks for reading

Are there has bs being advertised for activity coordinator? They are normally recruited from within. It's helpful to know your service users so you can plan for them. I'd be surprised if you got that job, unless there's a massive worker shortage were you are. If you can use your own initiative, within what's wanted and sometimes therapeutic, then it works better for everyone. My DD did picture bingo and ordinary, spent quite a while getting pictures of how the city was in the 30/40/50s for craft, which combined memory therapy etc. She organised the trips out, she'd have themed days and have singers/performers come in. She spent a lot of time building relationships with local theatre etc groups.
By domestic staff do you mean cleaner? Again depends on the size of the home and if they want you to use floor cleaners etc.
Is voluntary work an option?

To answer your other question, you should be outgoing and pleasant.

My mum did this job for many years (activities coordinator in a care home, not sex worker).

She enjoyed the job but it was exhausting and poorly paid, plus the managers were usually tools and often changed. Tbh, these jobs rely on lovely people being taken the piss out of, it's insane how important the job is and how little respect there is for it.

Working with elderly people is immensely rewarding alongside being hard work emotionally and physically. I would say you need experience in the sector before securing a job as an Activities Co ordinator. Perhaps as a Health Care Assistant.I'm a Mental Health Nurse and I used to work in a Resource Centre back in the better funded days of Mental Health services and running groups and activities for older people was a big part of my job. I've since worked in Adult Social Care. Over the years I've applied for quite a few Activity Co ordinator jobs and never got as far as an interview despite my seemingly relevant experience. I think they probably get a lot of applicants.

OP watch Derek think its on Netflix its set in a care home and main character kind of does that job ish Might help give you a broad/ loose insight

I used to work in a care home as part of the management team. Our activity coordinator worked her arse off, there was a lot of lugging stuff around the home (often you will take the activity to the people, rather than them coming to you). She based activities on calendar events so always lots to do but it was her own ideas, no guidance from anyone else.

It was her job to organise everything to do with the activity. Baking? Liase with the kitchen or go shopping herself. Visiting artist? Phone around, get prices, run it past management, check diaries. Visit the seaside? Sort transportation, get staff to volunteer (they wouldn't be paid), check all residents have their medication for the day, spends, glasses, hearing aids, do a risk assessment - including make sure no one is a flight risk.

It is not a cushy or easy job, it is all consuming and is usually done on a low wage.

I'd advise you to volunteer a few hours a week at a local care home, explain to them why you are interested and see if you can help their activity team to gain experience. My team would have jumped at the chance.

As an aside you will need to get a volunteers DBS check (criminal record) . The home should do it for you, its free unlike one for employment.

Thanks everyone, that's exactly the kind of information I am looking for.

It looks like I won't be qualified (or probably outgoing and creative) enough for Activities Co-ordinator.

Yes, by Domestic I mean cleaner in the care home. I think I could do that okay, but if it involved lots and lots of heavy lifting I don't think I could (got gynae-related back pain).

I am not sure why I am the way I am, but I cannot handle a lot of stuff in life. I have a diagnosis of PTSD (not from sex work, from childhood), so maybe it's that. I need a job that is low-ish pressure, doesn't require creativity, and doesn't involve lots of heavy lifting. Any ideas?

I actually have a DBS from when I volunteered but it was years and years ago. I've been trying really hard to get volunteering in care homes to see what it is like, but not getting anywhere, even after I chase it up. I have a support worker type lady helping me (although it's limited to 1 hour every 2 weeks due to cuts) and she is trying to arrange it for me, but no luck yet.

You sound a bit like me, I can't handle life "stuff" and I basically left the rat race because I just couldn't handle my own problems/general life and other people (from bitchy colleagues to friends with problems - I was drowning!)

I was signed off sick for 2 years and am now very happy as a domestic cleaner. I work 20-25 hours a week with a regular set of clients. There's not heavy lifting but I do need to occasionally push a sofa out of the way, carry vacuum cleaner upstairs. Definitely similar to what I saw the Domestics do in a care home setting, in regard to moving and handling.

One thing with the Domestic side of things - same as Health Care Assistant/Carer - you will (or should!) be required to do ongoing training. Every home is different but ours had online, multiple choice questions. You'd watch a 3 minute video on health and safety and then answer a multiple choice question (do that for up to 20 questions per topic).

So it would be a good way for you to gather experience and qualifications.

(have you considered being a carer? There's no heavy lifting as hoists will be in place for those who need it. Also, experience isn't necessary - just be good with people, caring and a good team worker)

@JuliaSways Thank you so much for replying, in a way, I'm glad to know others feel the same way as me.

Yes that's exactly it - I really struggle with pressure and being overwhelmed and I need to keep stress from all sources to a minimum or I just break down.

I could manage methodical jobs and I like helping people. So cleaning, delivery driving, possibly retail not sure, maybe admin from home.

I am glad you are feeling better. I've been signed off sick for 3 years since I left sex work. It's all I'd ever known really. I got into it when I was 21 and a single mum in debt and with my pre-existing mental health problems, it was more tolerable to manage strangely, because of the low hours you need to work and I couldn't cope with a 'normal' job with bosses etc. So I'd do one day a week and make the same as a full time job. But it has taken it's toll in other ways such as I find it hard to have a relationship with a partner now and I see things like sex and work and body image differently somehow it's hard to explain. I am grateful that sex work exists but wouldn't choose it again unless I had exhausted all other options first.

Are you a self employed cleaner? I've thought about that - get to work alone and listen to music - but I am a bit put off by the lack of guaranteed income in self employment. Do you find it really strenuous physically? Maybe I'm not used to work lol because I get tired after a 2 hour walk!! I think my body would get used to it though, hopefully.

I have been watching videos on a day in the life of a domestic assistant and it does seem like not too much heavy lifting for my gynae/back issues.

I have thought about carer as well, but I thought that would be more high pressured, and a close relative is a carer and they still seem to do a lot of heavy lifting despite the hoists, some staff doing lifts themselves they shouldn't to save time, and then bitching about the others doing it correctly taking too long, maybe it's not a well managed place.

I work in housekeeping in a hotel and it’s an industry desperate for staff. Maybe good to get some experience.

@Woeismethischristmas Thanks that sounds like a good option. Although I cannot make a bed to save my life!! Do you find it involves heavy lifting or is really physical? I've heard hotel housekeepers need to work extremely fast or don't pass probation?

I just started domestic cleaner in a care home. Personally it was the hours that made me want it most. I can fit in round school hours. No real heavy lifting. Everything needed is on a trolley other than hoover . There is alot of bedrooms/ bathrooms to cover but very enjoyable working with old people and in that environment.

I'm a domestic in a dementia nursing home.
I was a carer for 17 years before hand.
I really enjoy it. It can be noisy, and physically tiring.
I mop and clean communal areas and bedrooms, make beds, clean bathrooms, clean spills etc.
It depends on the type of home you work in.

Thanks so much @catthatgotthecream and @MrsR2be . It does sound like work that would suit me. I can do any hours because my DC are older, but I do like that it's generally 9-4 because it helps my mental health to have a schedule. I can hopefully get in, but maybe I should volunteer because I have nothing on my CV?

Not all homes take volunteers. The most important thing is a willingness to learn and a kind empathetic nature.

You don't always have to have experience to become an Activity coordinator just have loads of ideas. I got offered a job as an Activity coordinator a few years ago and I had no experience at all, however I proved that I had loads of ideas and was extremely crafty.
In the end I turned down the job, but only as I became a Domestic for the NHS. I know it's different to a care home buy I will say thar there's loads of bending and stretching. And plenty of walking. It's very tiring but can be rewarding (I work on a Mental Health ward so different to a normal hospital ward, it is more like a care home environment).

I had no previous experience at all. Was trained by a lovely girl that has been there for years and I have to say I am enjoying it. I wish you the best of luck and hope you find a job that you enjoy too. I agree as a previous poster said it's alot of walking in a day. So comfy shoes is a must!

Are you a self employed cleaner? I am but I work for someone. "Sue" does all the marketing, admin, payments etc and charges £15 p/h. I get £9.50 of that. She has 6 cleaners in total. I couldn't cope with her side of the job with my issues so am more than happy to take a cut
I have done this as a single mum and now am in a solid relationship with a OH who has a secure income. It is hard being a single mum and self employed, for the reasons you state. Some bigger companies will employ you.

Get to work alone and listen to music I really love it, I never see some clients but others will be home. I have really good relationships with my clients. I even play Pop Master (radio 2 morning quiz) with one lady and it's getting quite competitive 😂

Do you find it really strenuous physically? yes. I don't work full time but it knackers me out. I then have to get home and run a family of 6! (luckily OH does 50/50 but it still half kills me) this is the downside.

@MrsR2be Thanks, I do have those things!

@minimadgirl Thanks. I am not creative at all, although I love history and local history.

@catthatgotthecream thanks, can i ask what training you got? and what is a general day like for you?

@JuliaSways
I get what you mean. My DC are still at home but are studying / in high school, so they can barely contribute. I have no other adult to contribute to all the (rising) bills. I am happy to take a cut as well. I think I'd need guaranteed hours though.

I like listening to music and cleaning (even if I am not very good at it!!).

It does sound strenuous and this worries me a bit if I can handle it. I am fit-ish and I regularly walk 6 plus miles most days - apart from really bad core strength (separated abdo muscles which never went back) bad back / 'pulling' gynae sensations) meaning I can't consistently lift more than around 5kg, or 15-20kg ever.

@Iputthetrampintrampoline

OP watch Derek think its on Netflix its set in a care home and main character kind of does that job ish Might help give you a broad/ loose insight

This is the poorest representation of working in a care home ever! Watching it will give you no insight whatsoever 😅😅

It soundsca bit random but I wonder about focusing on cleaning for people in blocks of flats with lifts?? To avoid having to take things upstairs.

I do wonder about companion care? For example, my mum is a bit too ill for this but not far off. She had a brain injury and if at home would need endless patience and prompting, but the only physical care would be getting down to help her with managing socks and pull ups, or helping her shower. She'd need simple meals cooked but mainly as I say just huge patience as her memory is only a few minutes so you have the sane conversation over and over.

If you go to a care agency and say exactly what you can do and what you're looking for, it could work well I think.

Sorry for late reply. I worked along side the same girl for 6 days before I was on my own. I was very thankful for this as any questions I had she was always there. A typical day is firstly setting up my trolley. Basin of water, cleaning products mop etc. Then myself and another girl are give a floor and a half each to clean. ( 3 floor nursing home) I have 21 rooms and 5 bathrooms..yes it is alot but they aren't really dirty if that makes sense because they are being done every day. Its wiping all surfaces, cleaning mirrors and emptying bins in bedrooms. I hope this helps

Thanks @catthatgotthecream that is helpful. I'm going to go for it I think. Hopefully the physical side I can handle.