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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How far is reasonable to travel to kids party

51 replies

needabreak5 · 08/03/2022 21:24

I'm trying to arrange party for DC 6 (full class). Looking at options, and good one which has availability is at an activity centre about 25 min drive away. Or 50 mins public transport. Is that too far? Would you think this was inconveniently your DC had an invite? We live in quite a small town so not a massive range of options but there are some - it would be a repeat of recent or upcoming invites from other classmates though. Didn't want to 'copy' if that makes sense?

OP posts:
morechocolateneededtoday · 08/03/2022 21:32

Given young age and being all class party, I personally would use a venue someone else has already used, particularly if children enjoyed it. We've been to same venue more than once/same entertainer used more than once for class parties this year and children have not cared one bit.

As a parent, I prefer convenience of close to school because we have weekend activities and other children to juggle around parties. If it was further out, this would make me more likely to turn it down

AndAllOurYesterdays · 08/03/2022 21:34

As someone who doesn't drive I'd say that's too far. There has been a recent craze at our school for a party venue that's two buses away and my heart sinks when I see it on the invitation.

reluctantbrit · 08/03/2022 21:44

For me it would depend on the day. Weekday - no as I work and it was often difficult enough to arrange lifts for a mid-week party. Weekends - if it is something great and DD is a good friend of the birthday child, then yes.

You may get more declines than for a more local party.

Remember that siblings could have activities so the one parent staying at home may still need the car to ferry them around.

I would either do a smaller party or stick with tried and tested.

Original poster
needabreak5 · 08/03/2022 21:45

Thank you! That's helpful, will check availability of the local one and might book that instead. Yes i think if I was a non-driver I'd think it was a bit of a trek too! It's actually not far (4 miles) but it's a busy traffic route which on average takes 25-30 mins. This also makes me think people will be very late who don't drive the route often and underestimate the weekend traffic!

OP posts:
milkysmum · 08/03/2022 21:48

Half an hour to drive 4 miles - heck 😮

Blueeilidh · 08/03/2022 21:52

I would be ok with 25 minutes

FawnFrenchieMum · 08/03/2022 22:03

Depends on the activity for me, drive 25 mins just a different soft play when we have one / several in our town. No thanks! But something like snow tubing, ice skating, go karting etc that’s much less available and an exciting party then I’d travel.
I think whole class parties tend to be close by, the further away ones tend to come once your down to 6-8 close friends though if I’m honest.

SmallestInTheClass · 08/03/2022 22:11

Too far for me, drive there, stay for the party then drive back is a big chunk of the weekend gone. I'd get a church hall or similar with a bouncy castle or entertainer somewhere nearby.

Original poster
needabreak5 · 08/03/2022 22:15

Thanks! Activity is a jump trampoline park. The local options are a soft play (catering party room provided) or a DIY in church hall (and book own entertainment) which is more effort! One other quite local option (farm based) which is quite weather dependant for a late April birthday...

OP posts:
gogohm · 08/03/2022 22:16

How can it take 25 mins to go 4 miles??? Even in cities traffic isn't that bad. I drive 6 to work

Original poster
needabreak5 · 08/03/2022 22:18

It may not / shouldn't take 25 mins, but honestly in reality it always does. The traffic is just awful! Even right now this late google maps is saying 18 mins with amber/red bits!

OP posts:
BeHappy91818 · 08/03/2022 22:20

25 minutes drive is fine.

Original poster
needabreak5 · 08/03/2022 22:20

It's basically from one side of one town to the opposite side of the other, so two badly laid out town centres to fight through. And always temp lights or roadworks in the middle!

OP posts:
Hankunamatata · 08/03/2022 22:21

I would for trampoline park as my kids rarely get to go as so expensive

HundredMilesAnHour · 08/03/2022 22:24

@gogohm

How can it take 25 mins to go 4 miles??? Even in cities traffic isn't that bad. I drive 6 to work
Actually the average speed driving in London is 8mph so yes, the traffic can be that bad in cities.
RockingMyFiftiesNot · 08/03/2022 22:32

I'd make the effort for a more local option if it were my child's party. Other parents won't necessarily make the effort for a 25 min journey so you might find quite a few no-shows.

angelsandinsects · 08/03/2022 22:49

I wouldn't give it a second thought. I'd also make it clear in my reply to you that I'd have a couple of seats spare in the car so that, if anyone told you they couldn't make it for transport reasons, you could put them in touch with me and I could take them/their DC.

FluffyBooBoo · 08/03/2022 22:59

Perfectly normal to drive that far (well, further usually) for a children's party where I lived (very rural) when my children were that age. And we would definitely have attended for something like that.

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 08/03/2022 23:03

Can you offer to give lifts to some kids?

That's a long way to go if the parents then have to drive home and then turn back around an hour later.

RampantIvy · 08/03/2022 23:03

Living rurally, just about all parties were a 20 - 25 minute drive away as there weren't any decent venues closer. So it wouldn't have put me off.

Xmasbaby11 · 08/03/2022 23:06

I think that's ok. Assuming parents are dropping off and there's something to do locally - I wouldn't want to go home and return.

As pp said, parents can share lifts. This happens a lot around us especially when loads of kids are going.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 08/03/2022 23:40

My kids used to love Jump In and didn't mind driving about 25 minutes. If it's a WhatsApp invitation you could suggest people do lift shares and offer to take another child with you. Any none drivers could ask for lifts too.

TabithaHazel · 09/03/2022 06:40

It depends where you live really, if you live rurally and not many venues close by I think people wouldn’t mind, but if you live somewhere with lots of venues much closer then that might put people off - especially if it’s a drop and run party. Also to be honest with the price of petrol lately I don’t think I would ‘waste’ it on a kids party (unless it was a very close friend) and if the venue was tricky to get to on public transport I think we just wouldn’t bother.

Bunnycat101 · 09/03/2022 06:44

25-30 mins is ok. Lots have been 5-10 mins if they’re a hire a hall job but for anything at a venue it tends to be more of a trip. Most families drive though where we are so I wouldn’t consider public transport. I just couldn’t be bothered if it was a 50 min bus trip.

newname12345 · 09/03/2022 07:07

Is a trampoline party for 5/6 year olds really a drop and run party? I think I would have stayed for this one, and hence the distance wouldn't worry me as long as it was something different/better than options that were a bit closer.