Annoyed at my MIL’s comment & attitude

[doremifaso]

I was telling my MIL today how I plan on going back to work soon, just doing one evening shift a week (on Saturdays) and as soon as she heard that she looked at my husband and asked if he’s ok with that and whether he’d be able to manage/cope with the kids (6 and 6 month old).

She was looking at me as if I’m mad to be returning to work so soon and dumping the kids with my DH and I found myself having to explain how its only a 5 hour shift, that I’d be sorting out everyone’s dinner before I go so that all her precious son would have to do would be making sure both kids are fed and put to bed!
Luckily our youngest is really good at bedtime as well and goes down without a fuss.

Thinking about it now, nobody asks if I’m alright or if I can manage when DH sometimes decides to go out with his mates after work leaving me with both kids!

Good grief, why did you pander to your MIL's nonsense, any why didn't your husband tell his idiot mother to wind her neck in?

Never, ever, justify your choices to her, ever again, and have a very serious talk with your husband about his obnoxious mother. He needs to be in your corner, always.

Well to be fair afterwards she did say it would be good for me to do something different and did support my decision.
I was just a bit taken back with her immediate reaction.

Go out more often!

And definitely tell DH he can’t go out to meet his friends because his mum thinks it’s not fair to leave both kids on one parent for a few hours.

I remember when I was married told me I was lucky that my husband, her son, was so willing to look after the kids while I worked.

I just laughed then pointed out I also looked after the kids while he worked and that looking after his own kids while I worked to cover 75% of the bills was the least he could do. She wasn't happy but by that point I gave no fucks.

Sorry posted too soon. If she makes the comment again, point out that you look after them all the time alone.

What a a backwards 1950s attitude she has. I would have said to her, "why wouldn't he? Are you saying your son cannot parent his own children? What's the difference between me having them on my own all day and him having them on his own all day, other than one of us is a woman?"

In hindsight you should have said
Really mil. You brought dh up, do you not think he’s capable of parenting his dc for one day a week.
You have a poor opinion of him. How sad.

Yes take the approach above. "Poor DH, you must be so hurt your mother doesn't think you're capable of parenting your own children."

And don't fix the bloody dinner if you're at work over dinnertime, let your DH do it like I'm guessing you do the other six days a week!

Why are you sorting out dinner for everyone?!

@JenniferBarkley

Yes take the approach above. "Poor DH, you must be so hurt your mother doesn't think you're capable of parenting your own children."

And don't fix the bloody dinner if you're at work over dinnertime, let your DH do it like I'm guessing you do the other six days a week!

This 🏆

Why make everyone's dinner before you leave?

And what did your DH say?!