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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to want to be referred to as ‘Comrade’

173 replies

Shellacbabe · 23/02/2022 19:42

I work for a university and many uni staff are on strike this week. I am not a member of the union so am not on strike, and disagree with a few of the things that the strike is fighting for, but my main gripe with the union is that many members still hail each other as ‘comrade’. Can we agree that communism is dead, and that’s a very good thing, and referring to people as ‘comrades’ has no place in a modern society?

OP posts:
Paeonia · 23/02/2022 20:06

@Shellacbabe

I work for a university and many uni staff are on strike this week. I am not a member of the union so am not on strike, and disagree with a few of the things that the strike is fighting for, but my main gripe with the union is that many members still hail each other as ‘comrade’. Can we agree that communism is dead, and that’s a very good thing, and referring to people as ‘comrades’ has no place in a modern society?
"Comrade" does indeed have a wider meaning, as others have said, and given that you personally are not referred to in this way, it shouldn't be your business. Besides this, I am intrigued though by your claim re the reasons for the strikes. Unless of course your pension has not been affected by yesterday's decision, your workload and pay is fine and have not faced any discrimination whatsoever.
stuntbubbles · 23/02/2022 20:06

Cowards flinch and traitors sneer, OP

tearinghairout · 23/02/2022 20:11

I was very surprised to hear everyone calling each other comrade when I started going to union meetings. It made me see my colleagues in a new light, and they weren't being jokey or ironic. What's wrong with 'friends'? YANBU.

mummykel16 · 23/02/2022 20:21

@Shellacbabe

I work for a university and many uni staff are on strike this week. I am not a member of the union so am not on strike, and disagree with a few of the things that the strike is fighting for, but my main gripe with the union is that many members still hail each other as ‘comrade’. Can we agree that communism is dead, and that’s a very good thing, and referring to people as ‘comrades’ has no place in a modern society?
I agree It's very weak
Brefugee · 23/02/2022 20:25

you're not being called comrade though are you? They are calling each other comrade, and more power to their elbows. It's a risky move striking for the collective good.

Am going to assume that if they make any gains, you are going to turn them all down.

Persephoned · 23/02/2022 20:30

If it helps, I think the term comrade is a friendly one, and I def don’t think Jeremy Corbyn is the messiah! Or even support him tbh. V confused as to what your issue is. If you have a personal objection then raise it and I’m sure people will be kind and make an effort not to address you that way, albeit informally

Original poster
Shellacbabe · 23/02/2022 20:31

I just don’t think having a massive defined benefit pension scheme hanging around the neck of universities is an efficient way to run an educational charity, which is what universities are. Cut my pension to a defined contribution and pay the market rate instead.

But other issues they are striking on are really important. There are only 30 black female professors in the UK. That’s appalling. Short term contracts for academic staff - how are you supposed to plan your finances / a family on that?

OP posts:
Persephoned · 23/02/2022 20:31

Wait, hang on - you’re not a member of the union? Why do you mind how members talk?

Persephoned · 23/02/2022 20:33

IMO the ‘comrades’ are doing a good think supporting one another and advocating for positive change…if you don’t wish to be part of that, because they use the term comrade, then that’s totally okay, you don’t have to! I am sorry I don’t know what your AIBU is?

Original poster
Shellacbabe · 23/02/2022 20:34

The unions can do what they like, but they’d make much more progress if they cut the socialist nonsense and broadened their base a bit. You don’t have to be a socialist to see that 30 black female professors is a bad thing. You seem to have to be a socialist to join a union.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 23/02/2022 20:36

I prefer brothers and sisters. But comrade is acceptable.

I don't like Corbyn, nor am I a communist. But I do like the idea of unions uniting and mobilising the workers. Do you not?

MintyFreshBreath · 23/02/2022 20:36

Haven’t you got anything more important to worry about?

CaMePlaitPas · 23/02/2022 20:37

No you're right OP, this union should bend to your will and yours alone. Then you can rightfully be refered to as "Fuhrer".

Original poster
Shellacbabe · 23/02/2022 20:38

That’s my point. They are not uniting me because they are using terminology which in my eyes is only used by the hard left, and that’s not for me. But maybe I’ve studied too much Russian history and it’s coloured my use of the phrase in ways it hasn’t for others and I’m the weird one.

OP posts:
cuno · 23/02/2022 20:39

I don't know why the term comrade conjurs up images of Jeremy Corbyn for you, speak for yourself as it certainly doesn't for me.

MrsTerryPratchett · 23/02/2022 20:40

@Shellacbabe

That’s my point. They are not uniting me because they are using terminology which in my eyes is only used by the hard left, and that’s not for me. But maybe I’ve studied too much Russian history and it’s coloured my use of the phrase in ways it hasn’t for others and I’m the weird one.
I think that is the issue. There are words I struggle to use because my context is different to other people's. That doesn't mean my interpretation is correct.
FangsForTheMemory · 23/02/2022 20:40

If that's the biggest problem you have, I envy you.

Torunette · 23/02/2022 20:40

@NecklessMumster

My union uses 'comrade ', (Unison). I like it. But a Polish colleague was shocked, he said it had very different connotations where he was born, near Russian border?
It has a very different connotation to my family as well. You would think all the focus on inclusion and diversity these days would make people realise that certain terms have very perturbing resonances for others.

But British socialists don't see this, largely because it wasn't their family members shot en masse or deported to gulags or ethnically cleansed from historical homelands.

DreamingofTimbuktu · 23/02/2022 20:41

I think if you dislike socialism you are going to struggle with Trade Unionism, the two are intrinsically linked no matter what members call each other

MrsTerryPratchett · 23/02/2022 20:46

You would think all the focus on inclusion and diversity these days would make people realise that certain terms have very perturbing resonances for others.

But you can't change words based on every possible context. I don't use the word 'Indian' unless I'm very very sure of context because I've had a lot of relationships with Indigenous people. But should the entire Indian subcontinent stop using it because others don't like it? Of course not.

Comrade in the context of unions is different than in the context of Russian history.

MrsTerryPratchett · 23/02/2022 20:47

And I have Polish and Russian heritage.

TheHateIsNotGood · 23/02/2022 20:48

Agree OP - I also find the use of "colleague" just as offensive -merely another name for a capitalist slave.

Brefugee · 23/02/2022 20:50

The unions can do what they like, but they’d make much more progress if they cut the socialist nonsense and broadened their base a bit

tbh you don't really seem to understand what unions are.

Boood · 23/02/2022 20:53

I was quite taken aback when I went to a WPUK meeting and a lot of the women were calling everyone “comrade”. Presumably if you’ve had a lot of involvement with the Labour party and unions it’s completely normal, but I agree with OP and others saying that outside those circles it is perceived as a bit hardcore. Fine if that’s what you’re looking for, but if it isn’t, it’s off-putting. I wasn’t entirely sure whether to laugh or run away!

HollaHolla · 23/02/2022 20:54

@Shellacbabe

They try to encourage people to join them on the picket but why would we when their political views don’t seem to have moved on from selling the Socialist Worker when they were students. They are not me, and thousands of other staff members. If they want to be successful, perhaps they out to consider why more people don’t join them.
Bet you’ll happily take the benefits that we union members fight for, though. You didn’t have to lose days of pay for striking, but you’ll take pay rises, improvement in terms and conditions, etc. You’re welcome.