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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should I end it?

9 replies

LKL8919 · 23/02/2022 15:16

Hi everyone, don't want to be outing so I'm going to be brief. DP and I have been going through a lot recently. There is wrong on both parts. I feel it is time for us to end our relationship, for the sake of our DC's. There are arguments daily, rowing with each other in front of DC's, no physical violence but it's causing me (and DC's) emotional distress. We live together and he is a great father. AIBU to make moves towards ending the relationship, or should I try again for the sake of the children? TIA

OP posts:
billy1966 · 23/02/2022 15:18

End it and move on.

Put your efgorts into co parenting as best you can.

Rowing continuously is so bad for the children and you.

Be brave and move forward.
Flowers

Original poster
LKL8919 · 23/02/2022 15:28

Ok thank you PP I agree about rowing in front of the DCs. It's not fair on them.

OP posts:
Tothemoonandbackx · 23/02/2022 15:35

What are the rows about, is there nothing that can be worked on??? Is there a chance for you two to have calmer words with each other, away from the children and discuss separating????

Pixiedust1234 · 23/02/2022 15:37

Move on. Continuing to cause emotional distress to your children is tantamount to abuse. Dont forget this anxiety can follow them throughout their adult life and affect their future relationships. Focus on that to give you the strength to leave him. Good luck Flowers

Original poster
LKL8919 · 23/02/2022 16:01

@Pixiedust1234

Move on. Continuing to cause emotional distress to your children is tantamount to abuse. Dont forget this anxiety can follow them throughout their adult life and affect their future relationships. Focus on that to give you the strength to leave him. Good luck Flowers
You are spot on. Thank you Thanks
OP posts:
Original poster
LKL8919 · 23/02/2022 16:08

@Tothemoonandbackx

What are the rows about, is there nothing that can be worked on??? Is there a chance for you two to have calmer words with each other, away from the children and discuss separating????
I have to be vague in case anyone I know sees this. Rows are usually about finances, favouritism with eldest DC, I have suspicions he is cheating and he has the same fears about me. It's draining and taking away from the energy I need for my DCs.
OP posts:
GeneLovesJezebel · 23/02/2022 16:10

Draining. I get that, that’s how I feel frequently too.
Make the move and end it.

cuno · 23/02/2022 16:36

My parents were like this and stayed together for the sake of the children and we have all been left with mental health difficulties because of it. My childhood memories are marred by it all. Please don't subject your children to this any longer, it's fucking miserable for all involved.

Original poster
LKL8919 · 23/02/2022 17:45

@cuno

My parents were like this and stayed together for the sake of the children and we have all been left with mental health difficulties because of it. My childhood memories are marred by it all. Please don't subject your children to this any longer, it's fucking miserable for all involved.
Thank you for sharing your story. It's given me the boost that I needed to be confident that I can do this. Thanks
OP posts:
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