Page 2 | Who pays?

SeasonFinale · 22/02/2022 18:52

Get the mollycoddled brother to pay

Disfordragon · 22/02/2022 18:55

Either the elderly relative or you split it between you.

TheDoveFromAboveCooCoo · 22/02/2022 18:57

@gingerscot

Quick back story: my mum is carer for an elderly relative. Currently said relative is attending hospital daily for treatment. Elderly relative has mobility issues and usually doesn’t leave the house. My sister’s car is the easiest for elderly relative to manoeuvre in and out of, so mum has been using that.

Mum now has Covid. I’ve been taking over caring duties, so I’m driving sister’s car.

Yesterday car got a flat tyre on way home from hospital. Who pays for new tyre?

I say, I was driving, I pay. Sister says it’s her car and she’s responsible for upkeep, so she pays. My mum says I was doing her a favour, she’s paying. My elderly relative says it happened during caring duties so they want to pay. Money is pinging around ad we keep transferring it around.

So MN jury - who pays???

It's really lovely actually that the argument is because you all feel you should pay rather than a nasty argument the other way round!

Why don't you put 1/4 in each?

BessMarvin · 22/02/2022 19:01

I'd say you on the basis your mum's providing time, your sister is contributing somewhat financially with the wear and tear on her car (and fuel?) so this can be your way of contributing? Though the third sibling is adding a complication!

Bollindger · 22/02/2022 19:10

Tell everyone to hand over £50. Pay the tyre bill out of it and all go out to dinner on the remains.

Dillydollydingdong · 22/02/2022 19:12

Sister, the owner. It could, and probably would have happened no matter who was driving.

Hairyfriend · 22/02/2022 19:14

Does the elderly relative pay your mum for this care and petrol/wear and tear on car? Is your mum getting a carers allowance?

Given that you ALL want to pay, I'd split it 4 ways.

Jvg33 · 22/02/2022 19:16

Aw bless you all. You all care so much for each other. Why don't you all pay equally.

Jvg33 · 22/02/2022 19:18

@Dillydollydingdong

Sister, the owner. It could, and probably would have happened no matter who was driving.

I disagree with this slightly. Some people drive more to the curb than others. The curb is where you would usually find nails etc

CorrBlimeyGG · 22/02/2022 19:21

Sister pays for the tyre and each of you buys flowers/ a little gift for one of the others. Everyone deserves a treat for their individual reasons.

MoiraNotRuby · 22/02/2022 19:23

I agree that little brother should pay!!

CrimbleCrumble1 · 22/02/2022 19:25

The elderly relative.

MrsWinters · 22/02/2022 19:26

Why don’t you let your mum pay for it and with the other three contributions buy an afternoon tea box for you all to sit and enjoy together?

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 22/02/2022 19:26

Just split it 3 ways and treat each other to lunch (when your Mum is better).

Totalwasteofpaper · 22/02/2022 19:27

Ah this is like my family….

I reckon Sister and elderly relative go halves.

Chocoqueen · 22/02/2022 19:37

Actually I want to change my answer. Given that elderly relative wants to pay, I think you should let her (assuming she can easily afford it). She's probably very aware of the sacrifices the 3 of you are making to help her and it might make her feel better to do this one thing for you all.

If this was a dispute because none of you want to pay, then I'd say it should be you as you caused the damage.

Chocoqueen · 22/02/2022 19:38

@Chocoqueen

Actually I want to change my answer. Given that elderly relative wants to pay, I think you should let her (assuming she can easily afford it). She's probably very aware of the sacrifices the 3 of you are making to help her and it might make her feel better to do this one thing for you all.

If this was a dispute because none of you want to pay, then I'd say it should be you as you caused the damage.

When I say 'caused the damage' I know it was accidental!

afuckinggoat · 22/02/2022 20:33

This is lovely and really made me smile.

RedRobin100 · 22/02/2022 21:46

Split it since you’re all so willing.

BoredZelda · 22/02/2022 21:59

If everyone is so insistent in paying, just split it 3 ways.

44PumpLane · 22/02/2022 22:12

I have no opinion other than the overwhelming need to smile at how refreshing this was to read. These are always "everyone thinks it's not them" but this is the opposite and you're all being so bloody lovely. Well done OP and family!!

Original poster

gingerscot · 22/02/2022 22:13

I’m loving the suggestion that my brother pays 😂 His contribution so far has been “if it’s seized a bit and you can’t get the wheel off, give a knock with a hammer” (which to be fair, did work!) He is very good in other ways but not good with cash at all!

Mum doesn’t take carers allowance because she doesn’t need it and feels it would be wrong. We love my elderly relative and she’s very appreciative and a pleasure to spend time with, albeit I know it’s still hard on my mum every day.

Still no firm conclusion, and I’m glad you all have different opinions too, shows why we’re able to still be lightheartedly debating this. Whoever does pay will end up getting it back one way or another. We ended up opening a “kitty” bank account because we used to argue about who wanted to pay for lunch.

Lightbulb moment - we can pay it from that account!!!!! I’m off to text…

OP posts:

Original poster

gingerscot · 22/02/2022 22:25

My mum has just replied to that text saying “it’s coming out of your inheritance end of story” 😂

OP posts: