To ask for a shorter show next time?

[RishiRich]

DD does lessons at a dance school. She loves it and I was looking forward to watching their annual show, invited various relatives etc. The ticket said arrive at 1 a 1.30 start, collection for those not attending the performance (the show was over 2 days so most parents just went to one) at 4.30. Three acts with an interval between each one.

Saturday: arrived at 4.30. They hadn't finished act 2. Finally collected DD at 5.45.

Sunday: warned relatives in advance that it was going to be long. Finally got out of there at 6. That was five hours, with one 10-minute and one 5-minute interval.

The performances were all lovely but the length was testing for even the most devoted parents There were multiple dances per group, plus group dances and solos. DD was in 6 dances - I wasn't counting but quite a few of the girls must have been in 15+. DD was exhausted.

Would I be unreasonable to nicely suggest a shorter program next time? And if so, how to put that really nicely?

Blimey!

My DC have just been in their bi-annual dance show. A school of 200+ pupils, 3-18.
It was a week at the theatre (Mon/Tues short rehearsals, Weds dress, Thurs-Sat evening performances and an extra matinee on Sat afternoon).

The show itself was 2 hour plus 20 min interval and very professional. It was like a military operation. One dance per class taken for juniors, extra dances for seniors.

It was a long week - Weds to Sat the kids were at the theatre 5-9.30pm. But it ran to time and no one got bored watching!

They should definitely work on doing smaller shows for specific groups if they can’t handle a full scale performance to time.

My daughter went to a dance school that did a show like that last summer. Went on for hours. Many children in multiple dances (she was in one!). We moved her elsewhere. It was way too much.

My kid was in FIFTEEN dances in her last show. Some were on 18… and my friend’s kid was in one!

That's interesting. I didn't do dance as a child (two left feet) so wasn't sure if that was standard. It seems not!

DD enjoyed it but I felt a bit guilty dragging so many relatives to it. DD's dad went to the Saturday performance and left early. Normally I'd put that down as yet another example of his crap parenting but I can't say I wasn't tempted myself!

Good luck with suggesting that , the dance teacher will love you 🥴

Yes, it is a bit awkward. "Lovely show, would you mind cutting it by three quarters next time?"

Yanbu - 5 hours for a kids dance show is excessive, not even West End shows go on beyond about 3hrs!

I would definitely feedback about the time scale being too much - even the intended 3hrs is a long time for a kids dance school, maybe they would be better working on quality not quantity - and the fact it ran over very significantly suggests it wasn't a very tightly run show. You ended up sitting around for over an hour on the Saturday and if you hadn't been attending on Sunday you would have also been sitting around for an extra 1.5hrs after the collection time, that isn't acceptable - if they were running so behind then they needed to start cutting things not expecting people to wait around indefinitely

Good. I'm glad I'm not being unreasonable. Any ideas on how to word this? The dance teacher and helpers obviously worked extremely hard to out the show on and I don't want to look like I"m having a go.

Five hours! Good god!

That's ridiculous! Even proper ballets at the theatre aren't that flipping long.

I'd defo say something! Not sure how I'd word it though...

That’s ridiculous. I just had a look at the royal opera house and Romeo and Juliet had a run time of 2h55 with 2 intervals .

5 hours is just mad. Parents only really want to see their own child and little ones just can’t manage that sort of length of show. I’d have thought there’d be meltdowns going on everywhere.

I can fully see where you are coming from. It’s an awkward conversation to broach. DD had a music teacher at secondary school - he was so passionate he didn’t know when to say no. They did a summer concert that went on for hours it was far too long - I was in pain sitting on hard seat. No matter how talented a child is no one wants to hear them sing at 11.30pm when show starts 7pm. Think every ensemble doing 2 numbers not 1 and letting kids do random solos etc, plus there were people leaving so presentations. He left fortunately and new music teacher made clear we’d all be home for x time at next show there had obviously been feedback!

Rather than shorter maybe phrase as need a finish time that fits with getting DC ready for bed/school the next day. Also allows more of DD relatives to see if finish early. (Although I suppose these might just lead to staring early.)
Definitely need to finish on time though even if it is long due to commitments, arranging transport.

That's crazy. My dd's first dance school was big and what they did was have just the seniors perform in both shows, but they divided the younger ones up so one lot were in one performance, and the rest in the other. Only grade 1 and up as well, so the hordes of tinies weren't in it at all. One dance per class so you only did more than one if you were doing more than one type of dance, ballet, tap etc. The seniors got more to do, but there weren't all that many of them.

I remember going to my DD's primary school orchestra show that ran to 3 loooong hours in a cold Victorian church. It was in the evening and lots of parents had younger children with them.

We were expecting a show that ran from 6pm till about 7.15-7.30pm. It started late and went downhill from there.

From around 8.30pm, muttering parents were simply going up to the front and taking their child and walking off with them, instruments flailing about in their DC's little hands.

I stuck it out till the bitter end with my younger DC as my DD was 'first violinist' and was needed for the finale, which finally happened at 9pm. On a school night.

That show included 12 separate drum solos, all of exactly the same piece, as the audience died inside a little.

The finale was a very 'individual' rendition of the theme music from Pirates of Penzance. It could have been anything.

That's ridiculous, so no, YANBU to suggest looking at alternatives. Will depend on how you normally communicate as to how it can be worded, but I bet 99% of the other parents think the same.

They could either do one performance each, and halve the length of the show, or do 2 separate shows - one for the beginners / Junior and one for the seniors. Nobody wants to sit through that. But you might have more success phrasing it as being so exhausting for the dc.

I don't know how old your dc is, but there are regulations about how late they can perform and how many hours etc.

For those saying split it up, it was split up! The tinies did their own shows in the morning (same venue so they had to be out on time to make way for the older lot).

I'm honestly dreading having to go again next year.

But still several groups, from your description - so, the dance school needs to decide if they feel it is better for each group to do their own show, and do several performances, or, for the whole school )less the tinies) to do a show together and everyone gets one, or 2 performances.
6 - 15 numbers each is ridiculous for the number of people they have in the show.

@RishiRich

For those saying split it up, it was split up! The tinies did their own shows in the morning (same venue so they had to be out on time to make way for the older lot).

I'm honestly dreading having to go again next year.

But clearly it hasn't been split up enough.

At the dance school DD attends they have Tinies/Juniors/Seniors/Adults. Whenever they have shows the evening show is about 2.5hrs, two halves with a break midway through, and has Juniors/Seniors/Adults. It is always split so that the Juniors all perform in the first half. That way parents can collect their Juniors at intermission if they wish and any who aren't collected (because other family is in the 2nd half for example) can then be moved to a green room area with snacks and drinks away from the stage together with their chaperones who keep them entertained until the end of the show.

Your DDs dance school either needs to reduce the performances each soliist/group/class performs or split their shows down even further if they want to keep all of the performances - maybe a Juniors show and then a Seniors/Adults?

Could you maybe ask if it’s norm for show to be so long - couch it as it was a lovely show but too much for dd and difficult logistically as it overran so much. Then you can decide whether to sign her up for next one.
My DD’s dance school show is run with military precision and not long. Overrunning so much will have been a huge headache for those chaperoning backstage eg you can’t have kids coming and going willy nilly but some parents will have needed to pick up on time eg 4.30 pick up need to be in work later etc.

Sounds like more organising needed. Dd has done lots of shows with fairly big school. Tinnies do not do shows. Last show was 3vfull days rehersal over Xmas holidays then a week with evening rehearsal, lighting and costume then full dress 4.30 till 9pm Mon to Thursday followed by five shows Friday Saturday Sunday. She danced 8 dances and is a student at 15. The younger girls 5 to 6 yrs upwards did similar number but shorter dances . Whole show 2.5 hours with an interval. Ran very much to time . Professional schools do a lot of work for shows but are normally tight on show times. Maybe the commitment isn't what you wanted or expected in which case perhaps look for a smaller more local school.

5 hours is ridiculous. As is multiple dances per class.
One dance per class is perfectly fine and reasonable for the average dance school.

They could probably also do with better stage management. Usually there were several helpers backstage and in the wings helping, organising and directing the children to the right places on time.

Ours were around 2hrs and that was a fairly large school that ran several classes per evening.

I definitely feel your pain. In primary school, the Christmas plays were so fucking tedious. The parents dreaded them.

You would have thought they were putting on a West end show. Sitting on them little plastic chairs for nigh on 3 hours, getting itchy arse cheeks, thinking when is it ever going to end 😪😪.

Could you maybe ask if it’s norm for show to be so long - couch it as it was a lovely show but too much for dd and difficult logistically as it overran so much. Then you can decide whether to sign her up for next one

This ^
Crucially, talk to other parents and ask them to do the same. If lots of people point this out, then they are more likely to take it on board.

Good suggestions, thankyou. I think part of the reason it overran was that the same dancers were in multiple back-to-back dances needing different costumes. Even if every outfit change is designed for speed, that inevitably takes time. Plus, the eleventy-million dances.

Dance teacher here- you absolutely would not be unreasonable to complain!! That’s far too long for a dance school show, and bad planning by the teacher. Can I just ask, did the dances run back to back, or were there gaps of dead stage time in between, or a compère? I know children need to have time to get changed, but that is a completely ridiculous run time and certainly needs addressing.