Best friend mil woes

[Isntisironic1]

My best friend had a baby 2 months ago, her DP has a 10 year old DC from previous relationship. Last night Mil was babysitting and DSC was getting dropped off there. The ex brought the child in so mil put baby in another room and hid all the baby stuff so ex wouldn’t know she had the baby. She even joked that it was a close one as she nearly left his blanket out. My friend was upset about this but her DP said she’s being too sensitive. She’s just come to mine in absolute bits about it and I said there’s no way I would put up with that. Is this normal behaviour?

No it's not normal. They are gaslighting your friend and lying to his ex.

Question is, why?

Jesus.., this is not ok. So are they also asking the 10 year old to lie to her mother?

Your friends needs to tell these people to grow up, and if they can't grow up and act sensibly, she needs to get her baby away from them.

That's really stupid, the ex will find out anyway when she collects her child and the child talks about the baby being there. This is definitely not normal behaviour, is there a back story to this because i presume mil thinks ex would be annoyed if she knew the new baby was there. Regardless she shouldn't have hidden the fact that she was babysitting her sons baby.

Well its all a bit odd tbh, his ex has never let him be in another relationship apparently so she’s tried her hardest to split them up. She refuses to drop DSC off at my friends house and will either make DP pick up from her house (friend not allowed to be in car) or drop off at mil. It’s all really odd but I’ve told my friend that his family are enabling exes shitty behaviour

Mil is making the 10yr old lie to her mother.... well that's stupid for a start.

I'd not be impressed with the DP though... that is not starting well if he thinks expecting his daughter to lie to he mother and his mother lying as well is fine...

Isn't the mil a red herring?

Your best friend has a serious problem with her so-called partner.

Has dc10 not seen your friend for 6 months or more? Otherwise presumanlymshes worked out friend was pregnant and told her mother anyway.

Sounds like do needs to get himself a cao from the court and tell his ex where to go with the stupid...

I imagine that the mil is in a bloody damned if you damned if you don't situation.

She wants to have a relationship with all of her grandchildren, but doesn't wish to rock the boat with either the dil nor the exdil.

I don't see this at all as gaslighting and actually see this as a lack of empathy for her situation.

So she knows they’ve had a baby but mil won’t put any pictures of DC up even though she has lots of all the other grandchildren. I don’t particularly like friends partner but she loves him and they’ve now got a child together.
In all fairness to him he has said (about the picture situation) that he doesn’t want ex going into mil house as there’s no need but mil said she doesn’t want to upset ex. My friend is distraught and I’m so angry

Why is 2 month old newborn being left at Mils?!

They went out for a meal for her partners birthday. Not like she left the baby in the car or at home alone jeez