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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask why you’ve missed/delayed/declined cervical screening?

936 replies

chickentikkawhatswrong · 19/02/2022 13:56

I see a lot of the campaigns on Facebook about women not going to smears or putting them off for too long.

However it’s generally stats and doesn’t seem to delve too far into the actual reasons?

If you are reluctant what holds you back from attending?

OP posts:
RedToothBrush · 19/02/2022 18:36

Just opt out if you dont want to have screening.

You can't. They continue to harass you and harass you.
Even when you tell them not to.

Letter after fucking letter.

I think its appalling that you are not allowed to say no.

I've tried.

Silverswirl · 19/02/2022 18:39

@mogsrus

Just reading these and wondering if the people fell prey to c/c. Would it make them think how stupid they were to avoid going for ten minutes to see that everything is ok
And this is the exact attitude that puts many women off going. Minimising the procedure to basically don’t be a big baby. Just because it wasn’t agony for you, doesn’t mean it’s not for someone else. You may well have put someone off who was on the fence with just this comment. Hope that makes you feel strong and powerful.
XenoBitch · 19/02/2022 18:40

@RedToothBrush

Just opt out if you dont want to have screening.

You can't. They continue to harass you and harass you.
Even when you tell them not to.

Letter after fucking letter.

I think its appalling that you are not allowed to say no.

I've tried.

Same. I still get at least two letters each year. And it get mentions when I am seeing a GP for something like mental health. Do men get the same level of pressure for prostate exams?
wolfmom · 19/02/2022 18:41

BestKnitterInScotland you need to ask your GP to notify them. I had the same and was listed as a defaulter even though I had everything removed 6 years ago

Skade · 19/02/2022 18:41

@Svadhyaya

It's incredibly insulting to insinuate that it isn't painful. Nobody has any way of knowing what someone else's perception of pain is like.

For me it IS physically painful and emotionally triggering due to past abuse. I can manage to get it done by taking a diazepam beforehand.

Oh - and as for childbirth - I couldn't give birth naturally either due to the same trauma and had a c-section I'd rather have my stomach sliced open than have medical professionals (probably men) rooting around down there

Agreed. I had two large babies vaginally in a short space of time without pain relief, believe me, I am well versed in pain. Cervical screening is a whole other level for me - I require 3 diazepam and a nurse standing by me with a vomit bowl for me to throw up into. It makes me very angry to hear people say that I am somehow being silly for finding it painful.
RedToothBrush · 19/02/2022 18:44

I've requested that my GP doesn't do this because its one thing (of many) that stops me going to the GP because of the harassment. It was supposed to be added to my notes with a big - don't do this.

Still happened.

It has seriously damaged my trust, because I don't feel listened to and respected.

No is not a word that exists in this context. We can't make an informed choice to opt out. Thats fundamentally wrong in its own right.

grapewine · 19/02/2022 18:44

Just reading these and wondering if the people fell prey to c/c. Would it make them think how stupid they were

Comments like this one are so fucking unhelpful. It is not the woman's fault if she gets cervical cancer. And that campaign ad upthread should not have been approved.

But for some reason, it is OK to condescend and guilt-trip women.

greyinganddecaying · 19/02/2022 18:44

So am I correct in thinking:

1- if you don't have HPV they won't test for abnormal cells. So if you know you're HPV negative there's no point in having a smear.

2 - most cervical cancer cases are picked up on symptoms rather than screening

3 - if you've not had sex since your last smear (that was HPV negative) then it's unlikely that you'll become HPV positive (and what's the reason for asking about sexual activity at a smear test?)

4 - you can't use lube for the smear test, so if you have vaginal atrophy then there's a decent chance it'll be more difficult/painful - there's no way around this

Terfydactyl · 19/02/2022 18:45

@Appin

I used to think smears were uncomfortable until one found cervical cancer. What I then went through in terms of treatment and investigations was beyond uncomfortable.
See I opted out of smears completely, no reminder letters, no stress in the run up to it, no asking for valium to get through it ( I didnt but I sorely wanted to) because I had a truly terrible smear years ago. I mean off the charts insane, not even a psychopath would treat someone like that. And then you tell me if I get cervical cancer then it's worse treatment still. In that case I'd rather not know, I'm gonna die one day of something, rather die than have any more rummaging around by strangers down there.

And OP ^ this is why I will never ever have a smear again. If the healthcare system had been more forward thinking, they might have realised such an invasive test on the population that is raped and assaulted most often was not a great idea. Add to that the HCPs who make it a hundred times worse than it could be and you put off a massive chunk of women.

Everyone else who detests them or no longer wants one, email your surgery, tell them you no longer consent to smears and you will not have any more fear inducing letters.

Theluggage15 · 19/02/2022 18:46

When I tore on the last occasion, it was the dismissive and unpleasant attitude of the nurse that was the worst thing. I’ve done my research and know I’m very low risk and am not going to go again.

The attitudes of some on this thread remind me of the nurse.

JenniferWooley · 19/02/2022 18:51

@EmmaH2022

Jennifer why did they do a biopsy?
Because they used to do it routinely at 40, it's currently done routinely at 45 & she said because I'm 43 they'd just do everything at the same time.
YfenniChristie · 19/02/2022 18:55

The nurse played a big role in why I delayed having it done.

When I first started having smears, I never had any problems - nurse was brilliant. Then I moved, had to change GPs and the nurse was awful. She could never find my cervix meaning I'd have to hold an uncomfortable position in order for her to locate, I always bled afterwards and she had an awful bedside manner. When I was distressed during a screening exam following a biopsy for abnormal cells, she scolded me for being so upset when the cells I had were the lowest risk possible and I was being "dramatic." (I wasn't aware of this - I have other grievances regarding a lack of communication with Cervical Screening Wales around that time)

I've changed GPs again, and it was a completely different ballgame. No faff, no bleeding, excellent bedside manner.

I've always encouraged my friends to attend their cervical screening but that nurse really made me reconsider attending.

Saltisford · 19/02/2022 18:56

Just came back to say can I clarify that my laughing face (🤣) was not at people’s personal pain (I apologise for any offence caused) but at comparing the ridiculousness of labour that for me ended in a lot of pain and an emergency c section against the painless quick swab of my cervix that I have experienced multiple times (something similar to cleaning my ears out with a cotton bud yet but more intimate 🤪). Just being ironic…

Sandinyourshoes · 19/02/2022 18:56

Haven’t been for ten years, the last one was unsatisfactory, painful and bled for days, and I was supposed to go back. I think I’m at the age they stop now anyway.

bitemyarsenic · 19/02/2022 18:57

So am I correct in thinking:

1- if you don't have HPV they won't test for abnormal cells. So if you know you're HPV negative there's no point in having a smear.

No high risk HPV can occur even after being dormant.
Not all cases are related to HR HPV
Rare but around 11 in 100,000

2 - most cervical cancer cases are picked up on symptoms rather than screening.
Advanced cancer is usually picked up on symptoms
This is a screening and prevention programme, to pick up HR HPV and cell changes years before they reach the cancer stage

3 - if you've not had sex since your last smear (that was HPV negative) then it's unlikely that you'll become HPV positive (and what's the reason for asking about sexual activity at a smear test?)
See above
possibly to ask if you need contraceptive/ STD screen

4 - you can't use lube for the smear test, so if you have vaginal atrophy then there's a decent chance it'll be more difficult/painful - there's no way around.
Vaginal atrophy is treated with Oestrogen cream or pessaries

Learningtofeminist · 19/02/2022 18:58

Because it’s my body and my choice. “Embarrassment” is really not the right word for a desire not to have somebody inserting something into your vagina.

(Also, as my husband is the only person I’m likely to have caught HPV from, I’m lower risk than average. But that aside: if they want to put something up me they’re going to have to get me unconscious first, and they’ve never offered to do that.)

Chouetted · 19/02/2022 18:58

I've never been sexually active, so my view is that I'm more at risk from the screening than I am from not being screened.

I got the HPV jab instead. It seemed like a better investment of my time, and my GP agreed with me.

WheresTheLambSauce · 19/02/2022 18:59

It would be my first one, and general worries about doctor appointments plus anxiety about any pain and discomfort (as I've never had anything up there) mean I've been putting it off Blush

GreenWhiteViolet · 19/02/2022 19:01

I've never had one.

I've had the HPV vaccination, I'm not sexually active, and I've had traumatic experiences that mean an intimate examination of that kind would be extremely distressing to me.

I'll take the very small risk of cancer over the near-certainty of a panic response should I try to have it done.

I've declined several times and asked to opt out and stop receiving reminders about it, but my wishes are ignored - which really isn't an encouraging sign.

Popcornriver · 19/02/2022 19:02

Because of an awful, rushed medical procedure that left me screaming in pain. The nurses at my GP surgery are lovely too so it's not embarrassment or worry that the person doing it won't be kind. And I'm aware this sounds pathetically stupid but if I went for the smear and was told I required treatment for abnormal cells, I already know I couldn't go through the procedure having read what it entails. Then reading stories of those online that had it and no pain relief was offered. Just no. I can't do it. So I'll take my chances as I do with the other cancers that aren't screened for.

Perhaps if the first step was testing for the HPV virus without gathering cells with a smear I might have done that.

MollyQueenOfSocks · 19/02/2022 19:03

Pregnancy! It dod not stop them texting 4 times and calling twice Hmm

Between that and the covid jab tests I was getting constantly spammed (3 booster texts a day at one point!).

Porcupineintherough · 19/02/2022 19:03

Not all cases are related to HR HPV

No but the ones that aren't are only picked up later through symptoms. Because they only screen for HPV now and, if you are negative, no one is looking at the cells on your cervix.

XenoBitch · 19/02/2022 19:03

@WheresTheLambSauce

It would be my first one, and general worries about doctor appointments plus anxiety about any pain and discomfort (as I've never had anything up there) mean I've been putting it off Blush
I remember learning about smears when I was in school.... so well before an age we had sex, let alone had a speculum anywhere. The thought of a metal contraption going inside, and opening up was traumatic. I had my first and only one at 27 (was getting tested for a STD after being pinged by FWB).
WhenZoomWasJustAnIceLolly · 19/02/2022 19:03

Because they only test for HPV and don’t look at the cells unless you test positive. I know I won’t be HPV positive so it seems pointlessly invasive. Especially when I could just do a urine HPV test.

RobynsMama · 19/02/2022 19:04

i’m a nurse myself and understand the importance of them but i always end up delaying my smears. i was raped in the past and the whole process brings up horrific memories/flashbacks for me. one particular appointment the nurse walked out of the room to “let me compose myself” while i was struggling to breathe and when i tried to sit up she’d left the speculum inside me. i go to walk on appointments at the sexual health clinic now as i find the nurses there are much nicer/more aware of issues regarding sexual trauma b since covid this hasn’t been an option so unfortunately i’m now overdue Sad