Blanking - is it really as intentional as some people think?

[Swebby]

I seen a fair few threads here about ‘being blanked’ recently and I want to see if my gut response seems unreasonable - that blanking is very often (almost never?) intentional.

When I am out and about, and especially when I am deep in conversation with someone else I am not at all aware of other people going about their business around me. If I am walking along my eyes are generally not focused on the faces of people crossing my path, so I could very easily walk past someone I know only in passing and not be aware of them.

I meet a lot of people in passing due to my job, and I’d hate to think they are upset that I don’t acknowledge them if I’m in their vicinity again in a different context. (Obviously if they call out/say hi to me I would 100% notice at that point!)

So AIBU or are there enough other people like me out there to reassure people who think they are being ignored that that is not what is happening - the worst that is happening is that they have not been noticed? (Which may have its own emotional response as well I suppose.)

I live in a small place where we often all drive on the same road to the local town: we recognise each other's cars and wave etc
One friend I know never waves as she is so busy driving, and doesn't "see" that "oh look i recognise linmanuel in the same distinctive car she has had for 5 years"

I'm always in my own little world when I'm out, and my eyesight is shocking at the moment (WAY overdue an eyetest thanks to covid and then me just not getting round to it) so I'm sure people have seen me before and I haven't seen them.

This sounds awful as well, but I do sometimes also pretend I haven't clocked someone when I have, if I'm having a bad anxiety day. It's self care, I have no energy to speak to people (particularly those who aren't super close to me so it'd be forced, jolly conversation). I just want to do what I need to do, go home, and get under my weighted blanket.

It's important to remember even if you ARE blanked, not everything's about you, people live very different lives and you never know what's going on. Sometimes we literally don't have the energy to talk to people, and that's hard to understand unless you've been there yourself.

In school I was confronted by a couple of girls for blanking one of them. They’d taken offence, clearly. I couldn’t remember it at all so they described where it was and I still couldn’t even remember seeing her. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Some people think the world revolves around them.

YANBU. When I’m out and about I’m in my own world, I’m sure I don’t see people all the time

I agree that it is rarely intentional, I also have the face blindness thing, although I make an effort to say hi to people passing I’m sure I must miss some. I also think some people once they get chatting to someone don’t really notice who else is around but would welcome anyone into the chat, this is often seen as cliquey but everyone of course gravitates to those they know well.