Never go out (know that's the same for lots though especially recently). Can't even remember last time I went out even for coffe and cake, let alone dinner and drinks (7 months ago and that was first time since 2nd Dec 2019!) We've been floored with childhood illness after illness, plus COVID, bday scaled back as I was recovering from Noro, no Christmas drinks/ socialising due to Omi.
So took advantage of my parents being here for half term booked a really nice restaurant that I've been desperate to try. I never really ask for much from DH in terms of presents/grand gestures but one thing I love is a really great dinner and drinks....I'm happy to organise and always make sure it's somewhere he wants to eat also, all I want is for him to turn up and have a nice time.
Now I know a Thurs booking is a slight risk but DH is self emp so can be a little more relaxed.
Scheduled my hair colour app specially, did my nails, took my time doing, my hair and make up, bought new not exactly inexpensive earrings and was really excited. Told loads of people I was going out.
It was one of the flattest evenings I've had in a living memory. DH was clearly knackered. I'd really wanted us to try something which is to share, he'd normally love but he was sneery about it, said it'd be too much food and made me feel embarrassed for wanting to choose it, he wouldn't normally be like that. Instead chose something smaller/simpler and I felt I had to follow suite. He had to be coaxed to choose a drink when we got there, even the waiter looked at bit awkward at his ambivalence/bad mood. Anyway strange eve chat strained. But, I was so determined to have a nice time and a few drinks, they had my favourite cocktail which I had after dinner, it was delicious so ordered another. DH made a point of saying he was sticking with the water (so not like him). And made me feel embarrassed for ordering another then as the waiter left huffed and rolled his eyes....I was so taken aback, he's never done that to me and it had been such a strange eve I burst into tears. He apologised and just said he was really, really tired and thought we were going home - it was 21.05!!
Of course he's tired, we've got kids that don't sleep well and always give us their germs. DH was extra tired though because he'd been at a funeral (which I didn't know about - it was a school friend's grandma.) And then obviously to the wake in the afternoon and to be able to do that he'd gotten up extra early to do work he would be missing in the afternoon. Much of the chat in the evening between him stifling yawns was him telling me what a nice time he'd had catching up with Tom, dick and Harry and Harry's aunties cousin etc. So of course he cba and wasn't particularly hungry by the time we went out, he'd been up at the crack of dawn and spent all afternoon (3 hrs nearly) socialising/drinking/eating buffet food. Now I clearly don't begrudge him going to the funeral at all - but it isn't our family or someone he's seen in years, it was to support his pal and clearly don't begrudge that either...but that supporting also involved 3hrs socialising at the expense of an evening we'd had planned for nearly two months and something nice we never get to do any more. I just feel really, shit, shit because I suspect I am being a bit unreasonable re the wake (but I can't help it) and sht and embaressed that I spent time effort and money and he couldn't be bothered and I had a terrible time. He hasn't even bothered to say he'll try make it up to me as he knows realistically he can't until my parents are next here. I'm also fcking starving to boot as I thought we would really go for it food wise so had barely anything to eat all day yesterday either!!