Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

Travelling to a wedding tomorrow...

75 replies

Imthecaffeinequeen · 17/02/2022 20:11

Due to attend a friends wedding tomorrow (wedding is going ahead!), I am in SE and wedding is taking place in Wiltshire.
Roughly 1.5 hour drive on motorway/ A roads/ some country roads.

Will be travelling alone with my 2 primary aged children.
Due to the weather forecasts/warnings I am very hesitant in making this journey, reasons being the distance, driving conditions and being alone with 2 young children should anything happen.

However friend has had wedding postponed previously due to covid and I would feel awful letting them down last minute.

What to do??

OP posts:

Hopefullyoneday12 · 17/02/2022 22:46

If you do go, leave the kids. Not worth the risk. They are not able to make their own decision on this.
I don't think you should risk it either

dimples76 · 17/02/2022 22:46

I drove about 1.5 hours when Storm Arwen was battering the North East as I didn't want to let me goddaughter down - she had a lead role in a show. I'm a lone parent and as I drove back in quite scary conditions I was cursing myself for putting myself in danger. When I got back to my Mum's and saw my children sleeping peacefully I promised myself never again.
I totally understand about not wanting to let your friend down but it's not worth the risk.

steppemum · 17/02/2022 22:46

I am in Wiltshire, and our school over the border in gloucestershire is closed.
BUT the worst of the storm is supposed to be over by 12.
You need to leave around 12, so I would see what is happening by the end of the morning. As the storm moves east and you are driving west, then you will be driving into the aftermath, rather than the storm itself.

I am planning to drive my daughter to a birthday party at the end of Friday afternoon. I am expecting that it will be calm enough by then.

The red warning is only round the coast round the Bristol channel (and further south west) so should not effect the wedding.

TenoringBehind · 17/02/2022 23:02

I wouldn’t do it.

insatiableme · 17/02/2022 23:36

It's upsetting you can't attend totally get the feeling bad about the situation. But no way would I be travelling in red alert knowing the risks with two small children. Why would you consider a risk like that.

uncomfortablydumb53 · 18/02/2022 00:32

I'm in Wiltshire and the wind is getting stronger here now. Very unfortunate timing, but I wouldn't risk it

Wafflesnsniffles · 18/02/2022 00:47

Sorry op but I think your best plan would to not go. The wind speeds tomorrow and the gusts are likely to be hideous. Wiltshire is within the orange area but pretty close to the red zone. Just not wise.

Stay home and stay safe. Any good friend will understand - however disappointed they will obviously be.

StScholastica · 18/02/2022 00:48

What part of "Danger to life" do you not understand?
You would be mad and stupid to drive when there is a red weather warning, in fact I'm not even sure if your car insurance is valid if you drive against advice.
If you have an accident you are just putting more pressure on emergency services.

MrsBDefinitely · 18/02/2022 01:01

I would definitely not be going but understand feeling bad about not going last minute. Your poor friend might even have another cancelled in her hands, I can’t imagine you are the only person not risking travelling, including registrars, venue staff etc

It’s a shame but it’s out of anyone’s control

EmbarrassedAllOver · 18/02/2022 01:03

In the nicest possible way... For god's sake woman don't go! You're job is to look after and keep your children safe. That's number one.

Going out in a storm like this would be very irresponsible.

Don't go. End of. If she blames you, she's no friend.

EmbarrassedAllOver · 18/02/2022 01:04

*your

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 18/02/2022 01:37

I really wouldn’t do it, with a red weather warning. It’s just not worth it.

I was at Bluestone in Wales ( a bit like Center Parcs) with two children, but have driven home to London tonight so as not to get stuck in it.

Juliauns91 · 18/02/2022 01:46

I wouldn't go - not with 2 kids in the car. Trees are going to be coming down and debris flying all over. Roofs will be coming off. It's not a possibility - it's definite.

The wedding is about a formal bond and celebration being made between 2 people and they will still enjoy their day if you can't go. They will understand!

DrGoogleSaysSo · 18/02/2022 01:57

Under these circumstances, the bride and groom should understand. It's a long journey for you to travel risking having a crash. Keep yourself and your children safe.

RoyKentsChestHair · 18/02/2022 02:08

It’s unlucky timing for your friend but honestly given the warnings about the weather she cannot be expecting everyone to turn up. As long as she and her h2b are there, everyone else is a bonus! And if the event is a windswept affair it will be a story to remember! It’s not your responsibility to make her wedding day a happy one. She’s marrying the man she loves after going through a global pandemic. She’s a lucky woman. Send her your apologies and arrange to see her in person afterwards. But don’t risk your and your childrens safety to save wasting a plate of chicken and being one of many bodies on the dance floor.

USaYwHatNow · 18/02/2022 02:24

I'm a midwife living in Hampshire working in Wiltshire and will be braving the weather tomorrow (because I have to). Its such a tricky situation because you don't want to let your friend down but, in all honesty, the roads around Wiltshire can be dodgy at the best of times so you'll have to play it by ear in the morning I reckon

GiantHaystacks2021 · 18/02/2022 02:38

Surely the wedding party will cancel?
You won't be the only guest worrying about it.

Chickenpoxtwins · 18/02/2022 05:05

Of course your car insurance would still be valid if you drive when it's windy.

But i wouldn't go. It's not worth the risk.

GrendelsGrandma · 18/02/2022 06:22

@Chickenpoxtwins

Of course your car insurance would still be valid if you drive when it's windy.

But i wouldn't go. It's not worth the risk.

I'm not 100% about that, insurance usually has a policy term saying you need to do your best to drive carefully and avoid damage etc - driving when authorities explicitly tell you not to could arguably breach the policy terms.

Original poster

Imthecaffeinequeen · 18/02/2022 07:14

Hi, thanks for all your responses.

After waking up to a red alert in my area the South East as well, That's made my mind up I am not going to go. Completely agree safety is the main priority and hopefully I'm sure my friend will understand! The fact that I don't know the roads/area where the wedding is would not help the situation either.

Thanks again for everyone's input and hope everyone stays safe today.

OP posts:

Liondolphin · 18/02/2022 07:15

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-60426382

I’m sure you’ll be monitoring the news but I just read this and thought of you. I think it’s pretty clear cut.

blackdumpling · 18/02/2022 07:19

When I read the thread title
I thought it would be yet another hapless Mumnet member
Who is scared of driving
But reading the weather warnings
That sounds serious
Don't blame you
Maybe you could do a video call with bride & groom tomorrow instead
Hope the weather clears up soon

Peasandcabbage · 18/02/2022 07:37

@Fridafever they seem to be emailing this morning saying you can stay till tomorrow. Everything will be closed, stay in lodge etc. It's on FB

HerbertChops · 18/02/2022 10:14

I was worrying about driving to an urgent appointment this morning, but with the red weather warning everything seems to have been cancelled, including my appointment thankfully.

Fridafever · 18/02/2022 10:52

@Peasandcabbage

Thank you! Yes, we’re staying now phew!

Flip

1 2 3