Evening Zoom Meetings

[helenabonhamfarter]

I have absolutely had enough of these.
I work in a male dominated profession (in fact I am the only woman).
MST meetings (nothing urgent) are now being scheduled between 6-830 pm on a regular basis after other daytime commitments.
I have started saying "no" to these- it's such a precious and busy time for me. I don't see my children in the morning and I want to have dinner with them and see them in the evening.
Is this just another example of casual sexism where working women are disadvantaged?

So as not to drip feed I work in a professional environment where there aren't set hours- you work until the job it done. Nights and weekends too.

For those saying it's not sexism, nonsense. In a male dominated work world, these men have stay at home wifeys to deal with the kids, so their expectations are that you are "on" all the time

Blocking out your calendar doesn’t work in my experience. No one looks when there’s a group of invitees or they do, but go with the majority.

I have just learned to pick and choose in all honesty. It took a while but folk are catching on now - I’ll get an email asking if I can do that time before they add the meeting, or I just decline asking them to reschedule if I need to be there, or record the call and send me any actions.

It’s a slog but folk do get the message eventually IF you are consistent.

Block your calendar, if people schedule things during that time reject the invitation. Either they'll get the message or you'll be hauled in by management, in which case you can discuss your concerns.

I don't think it's intended to be sexist - lots of men would get pissed off by having to work evenings. It just sounds like, given you all work long hours, evenings have ended up as a convenient time for whoever organises the meetings. Have you challenged it? If not, you can't expect them to know.

I don’t think this is normal in your industry?? The only time I have experienced it is in tech start ups.

It’s not good for anyone. As you are a consultant that at least gives you the seniority to push for change.

If I were you I’d start by finding out how parallel departments in other hospitals manage it.

And then talk to colleagues in other hospitals to find out the pros and cons of alternatives.

Then work out the key people to get onside in your dept, and work with them on a plan for change. And make a noise if it doesn’t get a quick response - but don’t make a noise till you have viable alternatives and people onside.

Unless there’s someone actively blocking it, you should be able to see change in 3 months at the most.

But you will have to grasp it, which is an arse as you don’t need an extra job, but it should pay off. If there’s anyone similarly fed up rope them in early.

It is sexist in its impact, but its root is probably laziness and historical practice.

Unless you have no children or grown up children 6-8.30pm meetings would be a disaster. Little ones need put to bed, biggers ones need help with homework/transporting to hobbies

this reminds me of math teacher at DC school he literally never came for parents evening. The kids all knew it "Mr. X never comes to P't Eve".

Too few math teachers in schools, he was never gonna get castigated by school for this behaviour. Very secure job.

Similar to consultant surgeon -- they won't punish OP, no harm will be done if she misses these meetings. Ask politely if mtgs can be recorded & wait for someone to advise you there was something important discussed at one.

And 2.5 hours for a meeting!!!! 30 minutes is my maximum. We have ours through lunch time...which is ok once a week. I'm a GP. Some people live the sound of their own voices too much which is why meetings go on.

It’s not as simple as blocking out the time or declining the invitation of the meeting still takes place but without OP’s input.

What is the structure, OP? There must be someone you can take this to.

I'm not at all close to the medical field myself but my family were and are (not UK) and that was always the time these meetings are held (father and brother are surgeons).

Yanbu.

Do you have monthly audit meetings? I would be suggesting moving this to then and keeping it shorter. 45 mins should be enough. What about a rotating lunchtime? The meeting can always be recorded. Making it time constrained focuses the mind better, I find. If not, I would suggest it gets written into your job plan and see how that flies.

Ynbu

The first question I'd ask is who is scheduling the meetings?
then: do you have a partner at home, what is your childcare situation?
Have you raised this with HR?

The thing about your job is that it doesn't have regular hours and you would presumably have known this before having children? How did you think this would work out? (i am not being goady here - I'm interested to know if you knew anyone who worked in your current type of position who had kids, male and female who found it intrusive or normal etc)

I'm not trying to say that you shouldn't have kids in your job, or that you should reduce your hours or change profession. Just asking how much of this is expected that you knew about. How much of it has crept up unexpectedly etc.

Because i think when you can work that out, and then work out how you think your schedule should look, you'll be in a better position to approach more senior management and/or HR to change it.

Also - IME it is better to talk about work/life balance rather than specifically mentioning children. Every time I've done that I've been accused of not being committed to my job.

Definitely insist these meetings take place during usual working hours. You all have job plans. I bet none of them include regular Programmed Acitivites in the evenings to this extent?

Regular work in evenings needs to be accounted for as Programmed activity, 1 PA per 3 hours in evenings? Ask for urgent job planning from your CD

I've stopped attending anything on teams o zooms I can't engage with it. I'm fine with small catch ups with my team but I don't even pretend to be interested either. I found so much irrelevant shit in work I just cracked on with things that directly need my attention.