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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to actually take notice of the recommended age on toys?

81 replies

ceebee74 · 01/01/2008 19:33

I have always thought that the recommended age on toys is there for a reason (i.e. for safety reasons, or even that the child wouldn't know how to play with it) - what do others think?

DH's cousin bought DS (18 mo) a toy for age 3+ for Christmas - MIL thought I was being petty in saying that it was inappropriate (we have had this argument before as she keeps trying to buy DS 3+ toys).

AIBU??

OP posts:
RubySlippedonastraymincepie · 01/01/2008 19:35

depends - if there is a risk of swallowing tiny pieces then no, YANBU

if it is that your LO won't get the "most" out of it for a while then you are being a little bit unreasonable

themildmanneredjanitor · 01/01/2008 19:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumtomonkeys · 01/01/2008 19:35

what toy was this?

differentYearbutthesamecack · 01/01/2008 19:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TrinityRhinosDhWonHerAnIPOD · 01/01/2008 19:37

I'm not sure that it is a plain and simple as that

It is more expensive and a longer procedure to get clearance for a toy to be marked as suitable for under 3's.

Also surely if you explore the reasons for the toy being marked as 'over 3' and then make your own decision.

If you know why then you can make an informed choice

thegrowlygus · 01/01/2008 19:38

Depends on the toy. I know I am a lot less worried about it since having DS2 - he plays with most of DS1's 3+ toys providing they don't have chokable bits. And I wouldn't have let DS1 play with them because they said 3+.

lulumama · 01/01/2008 19:39

definitely depends on what toy

e.g magnetix - no YANBU

a toy truck - YABU

so, spill, what was it???

TheIceQueen · 01/01/2008 19:39

I'd say it depends entirely on the toy - we've just bought DS3 (only just turned 7 months) a toy for 3yrs+.....he can't learn the letters or numbers or anything else on it yet - and we didn't buy it with that in mind - we bought it because we knew he'd enjoy pushing the buttons making lots of sounds.

IME - onto my 3rd DS now.....a LOT of the toys it's just there a) to cover the manufacturers back (and once you have 2 children you try keeping the "unsuitable" toys away from the younger one LOL) and b) because of the stage of "development" that the toy is aimed at (letters, shapes, numbers etc etc).

WigWamBam · 01/01/2008 19:41

Sometimes it's because of small pieces.

Sometimes it's because of the expected ability of a particular age of child.

Sometimes it's arse-covering.

Common sense will tell you which is which, and whether you should keep the toy away or not. And you can always put it away for a while, which may be what your MIL intended.

So come on ... what was the toy?

Weegle · 01/01/2008 19:41

YABU to be rude about a gift. Your child will grow in to it even if you won't want them to play with it at the moment.

YANBU choosing what your toddler plays with. Therefore if you don't want them to have 3+ toys YANBU for them not to have them.

My 19 month old was only given 3+ toys at Christmas, bar one. He would be incredibly bored with baby toys now and actively does puzzles, plays with train sets etc all 3+. Obviously I would not let him play with anything I didn't think suitable. I am the parent, not the manufacturer.

Hulababy · 01/01/2008 19:42

CCan't say if being unreasonable without knowing what the toy was.

DD had loads of toys labelled 3+ well before she was 3yo. Like WWW says, depends on toy and why it is 3+

LIZS · 01/01/2008 19:43

Depends what it is . Toys like play food or tea sets are often fine , it is those with small parts which are the issue. Think there are different safety constraints for those toys marketed as suitable for under 3's.

mumtomonkeys · 01/01/2008 19:43

depends on what toy it is.
small parts on it? YANBU
but if its a childs toy like a car or something YABU

you as a parent can decide for youself.

you should have been asked IMO. should have been asked if it would be suitable for your ds.

if you think it isnt you are obviously not going to let your ds play with it. so therfore waste of money.

tbh. decide for yourself. look at it. if it dosent seem suitable in your eyes.
it proberly isnt.

Original poster
ceebee74 · 01/01/2008 19:43

This particular toy was a Postman Pat van which has a removable Postman Pat and Jess in and you have to push the van against the floor a few times to make it move.

It has small wing mirrors which I am a bit concerned about - but DH gave them a good pull and tug and decided they won't come off - and DS does love it.

But I deliberately won't buy him anything over his 'age' as I worry about it. I know I need to relax a bit - guess it is PFB syndrome

OP posts:
Weegle · 01/01/2008 19:43

And I hate to say it but I think I actually agree with your MIL!!!!

mumtomonkeys · 01/01/2008 19:46

if that was me
i would remove the small parts first.

then give the toy.

your ds obviously wouldnt play with it properly, at 18mo would go straight to the mouth anyway for a chew

Original poster
ceebee74 · 01/01/2008 19:48

Weegle - lol, how dare you agree with my MIL

Also, my view is that I wouldn't buy someone else's child a toy that wasn't deemed suitable for their age even if I was prepared to buy them for my own as I wouldn't want to compromise the parents.

Also, I didn't complain to the people who gave us the gift - obviously that would have been rude!

OP posts:
lulumama · 01/01/2008 19:48

aaaaaw, PFB.. i vaguely remember that ! sure it will be fine... especially if DH has had a good go at getting the mirrors off.. DS will enjoy brum brumming it around

themildmanneredjanitor · 01/01/2008 19:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lovecattlearelowing · 01/01/2008 19:50

Mmm... my friend had this toy for her dd when she was about 18m and she was fine with it, if that's any reassurance.

people were constantly buying dd 3+ stuff from birth, some of it was fine, some is stashed away.

Unfortunately she's now nearly 3 so I'm going to have to go and dig out the absolutely tasteless stuffed cat with pink accessories that friends of ours bought her from the Bear Factory as a christening gift(God, it's hideous!) and we hid away on the grounds that 'oh, look, it's 3+, she can't have it yet, it might be dangerous'...

WigWamBam · 01/01/2008 19:50

I have to say (and it really pains me to do this) ... I agree with your MIL on that particular one.

Original poster
ceebee74 · 01/01/2008 19:50

Lol Lulu - I can't wait for if and when the second child comes along so I can shed the PFB syndrome pronto!

OP posts:
JacanneAbox · 01/01/2008 19:51

We had that, way before 3, it was fine

lennygrrl · 01/01/2008 19:53

Message withdrawn

Tamum · 01/01/2008 19:53

I agree with your MIL too I'm afraid. It sounds as though it might be a bit young for a 3 year old to be honest. I always remember how much pleasure ds got at 12 months from a xylophone from ELC that was meant for over 3s.